Re: backbiting mil and sil
jazakallah for all the kind words, please keep me in your duas.
i had an arranged marriage but i apoke to my husband before marriage and also my nand who waas soo sweet, i loved her i thought she was so nice to me as well we used to spend ages talking on the phone, even after the nikkah thjings were great i was so happy, i was determined to be the best bhabi in the world to both my nands and be the best dil to my mil and fil and treat them with respect and love them as my own family but post rukhsati and post living with my in laws i started to see the real world.
impulse you’re right if the wife is wrong the hubby should take the mothers side but when blatantly the wife is in the right should the husband blindly say yes to everything his mil/sil say??? i dont say anything to my hubby i dont complain about his family even though their behaviour and there chalaak way of talking to me can be nasty, but if i happen to say one thing innocently or my family does its like owlrd war 3..i get a grilling from mil sayiung why why why why?
il tell you some of the situations which i have been through. for a start soon after the rukhsati i was on the fone talking to my cousin justgeneral chit chat, it was aroung maghrib time, and i could see a shadow outside the room where i was sat, and guess who it was my beloved sil listening to my conv. soon after i moved in they decided to get rid of extra fones in the house and just have one house fone in the main room where evryone sits all the time so that whnever i got a fone call they could listen and analyse my conv.
i fell ill soon after rukhsati and they believd i was ill from b4 but had hidden it from them. my sil is in the uk, whenever she visists, she’l fone home to her parents and just talk talk talk.when she came to visit me here whilst i was staying with my father our kitcehn was being done so i couldnt make her dinner, i just served tea with a varioety of other tea things, which was the bioggest mitsake beoz soon after i spoke to my hubby and he was like, why didnt you serve her dinner ??? i was like kitchen being done (there was a builder working on it wen she came) he was like no its becoz u dont giev my family importance thats why…i was like did she say it he was like dont u dare say anything abt her i asked her did they serve dinner, she didnt say anyting about u (how thick does he think i a am?)
then another time she foned and i said im coming round wat u upto? iw as like i was going to my cousins but its ok i wont go u come over (how nice it dat?) she was like nahe chalo rehne do..i was like NO COME IM not going, then she was like no no and then asid bye, so i knowing wat shes like i foned her 5 minutes later and said look i m not going anywhere just come over ok she was like no. so then a few days later i spoke to my hubby hw was like tum nai uss ko ghar anai sai roka kyun tha? meh nai ussai ab mana kar diya heh wo ab tumhare ghar nahe aye ge…he was really angry i was just like wat the hell and started crying and saying thats not true (btw i was pregnant throughout all this crap and had a premature baby) and obv it was my sil stirring again…coz my hubby was in pk at this time so how would he know wat was said over the fone.
so me feeling really guilty and wanting to please evry1 foned her and asked for her forgiveness i was like just come over, i know he’s stopped u from coming becoz of me but come she was like.so next day my brother was supposed to pick her up at 6pm coz he football and other classes going on around 1-5pm. i tolkd her that, she was like 6pm is too late i cant come, (i had already started making dinner for her) i was hes got football so he said 6pm, she was like forget it i cant cum, meh tou har dafa zaleel hojate ho jab tumharai ghar ana ho, koi na koi rukawat ajate heh, i was lik silent couldnt believ she said that, i pu tthe fone down and told my mum, was crying and my mum told my brother to just pick her at 3pm, so he was mad 
coz he got late for football but picke dher up anyway.
anyway i cant be bothered going into the other crappy stuff, i havent even told u the stuff aout my mil.but now we (sil and i) can barely get 10 minutes of talk done through the fone mainly becoz i dont like two faced people.becoz i know what shes really like its awkward and you can feeel the fakeness its disgusting.
they are just plain nasty, and just dont understand how they do it, how can they be so sweet to your face but then they are just horrid behind your back, but they are horrid to my face as well.my hubby just doesnt see it he thinks his sis and mother are just so great, before rukhsati he was like my family are really diff you’l really like them and i did really like them pre rukhsati but after living them ive come to realise they are just like any other stirinng complainig in laws.