do you guys think it’s selfish to delay having a baby for a couple of years so you can sort your life out and create a foundation for your ultimate goals and wishes for your life?
i’ve been having baby feeling soon after i got married … i guess that’s natural … i dont know, maybe not … it’s been over a year that i’m married. lately both my husband and i have been feeling so good about the thought of having a baby. it’s such a cute thought … sometimes we casually stop by at a shop window with super tiny baby clothes .. and we’re like awwwwwwwww … but even so, we both know it’s just not done right now. we have (an approximate) 5 year plan … not just for a baby but of our life as well, to bring it into a desired direction. hmph …
by what age should a woman must have already had her first child to avoid complications with growing age?
Well if both partners are thinking along the same lines then you're not hurting anyone. Most people have told me they just felt ready to take on a responsibility and the birth of a child reinforced their bonds and provided a challenging but very fulfilling addition to their lives. Very few people actually have regrets, everyone gets to have a few doubts here and there though I'm sure.
I wish for simpler times when everything didn't have to be planned. There is nothing selfish about it. Having a baby changes everything even the dynamics of a relationship so when you are both ready - thats the right time.
i mean, right now i see my parent's generation, where they sacrificed their life to give everything to their children, and as a result went through a lot of trouble. i see them struggling till date ... a time when they should be relaxing and taking it easy. good fortune doesn't come (easily) to everyone. this whole idea of being struggling and killing yourself well into your 50s really really puts me off .. makes me feel bad for parents.
give children young parents? give children older but secure parents?
I understand people look for the desired stability before having kids. However I have seen countless real life examples where the kids were automatically followed by stability and so for me even a basic level of stability would be enough for having kids. In the OP's case it's only been one year of marriage so that is probably too early regardless of stability.
do you guys think it's selfish to delay having a baby for a couple of years so you can sort your life out and create a foundation for your ultimate goals and wishes for your life?
i've been having baby feeling soon after i got married ... i guess that's natural ... i dont know, maybe not .... it's been over a year that i'm married. lately both my husband and i have been feeling so good about the thought of having a baby. it's such a cute thought ... sometimes we casually stop by at a shop window with super tiny baby clothes .. and we're like awwwwwwwww ... but even so, we both know it's just not done right now. we have (an approximate) 5 year plan ... not just for a baby but of our life as well, to bring it into a desired direction. hmph ...
by what age should a woman must have already had her first child to avoid complications with growing age?
Your other half sounds a bit like mine but we've even bought a couple of things (inc some super cute baby trainers) that we saw and just couldn't resist lol and we're still only engaged :D
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I don't think it matters either way** if ppl want to wait or choose to have a baby a little earlier (as long as they aren't already struggling to pay the bills or something).. My parents had me quite late (my dad is 60+ now but there is about a ten-year gap between him and my mum so by desi standards she was a 'late' mother for me as well in those days) but he says he has no regrets that he chose to marry after he was totally stable rather than before like a lot of other men back then as well as his own brothers.. Obviously everyone has different priorities tho.. Each to their own imo..
Ahaan :). It's do-able. Infact, I know someone very closely who got married this early, and they are doing fabulous. This is the right time to get married for girls. Also, when the body is healthy, young, and agile ... people quickly go back to their prepregnancy shape (and health) without much effort. Ask any old and wise lady, she will confirm that the girls who get married early stay young and innocent for a lawwng time, there is some hidden wisdom behind it.
… but according to our thought pattern, i wouldnt be younger than 32 when i ultimately have one.
