True, but she's speaking after watching the age difference among close relatives and I agree with her. In one case the guy was in mid 30s and the girl was in mid 20s when they got married. The girl was really looking forward to going out to lunches, movies, etc. but the guy's attitude was "been there done that". He did go with her but he wasn't as excited as the girl. There was some other stuff that he thought was boring but the girl thought it was fun, you know, the little things.
well that just sucks!! it's a bit selfish for a husband to have that kind of attitude!
anyway yea...it depends on the person's level of maturity and their personality.
Well, I would call him selfish but I always try to put myself in his shoes and try to understand the situation. Yes he should do this kind of stuff for his wife, but why force him to do it? Think of it this way: If there is a huge gap between you and your spouse and your spouse likes to watch cartoons but you don't find them as entertaining, would you still forcefully do it just because your spouse is still into cartoons?
^ That's only a year younger than me and I am think it's too young. lol.
What do you mean by completing half of his Islam? I am not getting your question. When you got married, did you do rukhsati or was it just a Nikah? I have three cousins who went to pakistan and only did Nikah then came here. That happens a lot actually! I can feel your pain if you actually got married, spent some time with your husband, then had to part from him. That's just cruel..
I thought it was too young too at the time! But i dont regret it at all and it feels completely right now too, all my worries about it are gone :)
oh i was referring to the hadith that was mentioned a few pages back about marrying completing half of your religion.
Tell me about it, i miss him :(!
AnGeL EyEs - ooh really? i hope so! i really like this hadith, i may be biased lol
i was 28 and the hubs was a month shy of 27 when we got hitched. yay! :)
as for the age difference thing, i have a friend who was 24 when she married a 34 year old and yeah, there was quite an adjustment on both sides. he'd been living on his own for a while, had been through med school, was all settled into things and had seen and done quite a lot. it was a shock to her system in a lot of ways- she was freshly graduated, focused on her career and doing her mba and living it up, generally speaking.
i think you have to be really prepared to compromise when you marry someone that much older and vice versa for them. i mean, marriage is all about compromise anyway, but in this case, it seems it was just magnified. so i dont know if i'd recommend it necessarily based on her experience.
having said that, they've been married three years now and are doing really well MA, so i guess if you can hang in there the first year, things get better!
^ That's nice.. I disagree that marriage is all about compromises. I mean IT SHOULDN'T BE.. What's the point if you are compromising all the time?
no, you're right, in an ideal world, people would be perfectly suited to each other and no one would ever fight. but unfortunately, its not like that. i think at least in the beginning, until you get to know each other well, compromise is the name of the game. and it doesn't have to be a negative thing- you don't have to sacrifice what you want, instead you come to a mutually beneficial decision.
