are arranged marriages these days becoming a last option for those people who cant find anyone else? ive noticed people who THINK or know they cant find a partner themselves talk about the joys of arranged marriage and are looking down upon love marriages…simply because they know they wont have a chance with a love marriage themselves. Ive seen certain SINGLE guppies talk against love marriages…and try to act like arranged marriages are the answer to everything…when these single guppies have had no experience of marriage at all…
just cuz you dont think you’d have a love marriage yourself…cuz u cant find anyone suitable…dont make it out to be like those going for love marriages are heading for disaster.
I don't think this is necessarily true for many... no matter what, anyone whether he/she is tall, short, fat, skinny, ugly, pretty is capable of having a love marriage... it's just a matter of going the traditional route for many, or doing what would make their parents happy. I'm perfectly capable of having a love marriage, considering my parents have made that a choice for us at home, but if I ever change my mind about getting married, I most probably would go with arranged marriage rather than love marriage...
Impulse, I sort of see where you're coming from. I think a lot of people who get married through an arranged process do so for the right reasons, whatever they may be. These are the people who have successful arranged marriages and realize that people can find a mate through an arranged process or on their own.
When you get into the type of people who are always beating the arranged marriage drum and constantly putting down 'love marriages', that's when you start to wonder what the motive is. Some of these individuals use really disgusting and cheap arguments to promote their arranged marriage cause and to insult people who found their spouse themselves. I actually thought about this a while ago, THESE type of people feel like they need to put down 'love marriages' because they weren't man enough to find a mate on their own and the only way they are going to find a spouse is if mummy and daddy find one for them. I say MAN ENOUGH because it's usually MEN who try to put down 'love marriages'. Women for the most part understand that marriage has NOTHING to do with how the people met but about the individuals themselves. It's usually the young, 'i know everything', males who just don't get it.
^ True about the men... they can date and make promises of loving the girl and "oh, I cant live without you, I wanna marry you" but the second their parents decide that they're gonna choose their son's wife, the guy goes running behind his mother's dupatta acting like he never saw a girl in his life before.
I dont think it has anything to do with "love marraiges, or arranged marraige...I say..wat ever works for U...go for it...as long as YOU think its right for u....
not everyone is capable of having a love marriage...
as far as keeping parents happy is concerned....there are more parents who are UNHAPPY with a broken arranged marriage rather than a successful love marriage. I know of soo many couples divorced who had love marriages and their parents are totally depressed about it. so as far as keeping them happy is concerned...i think id rather keep them happy by making sure i get married to someone with whom my marriage will last forever insha-allah.
p.s. whats ur logical reason for going with arranged marriage?
if a guy does that to you....it means you werent capable of finding a SUITABLE partner yourself which proves what I initially said. A real man once he's said "i love you" wont let you down.
(sorry lajjo for announcing this so many time..hope u dont mind)
btw impulse…not everyone wants to have a love marriage. Not everyone wants to find that special someone…in fact in this fast paced society…many dont have time to find anyone in the first place. Some people actually do prefer an arranged marriage for their own personal reasons.
I am trying very hard not to comment on your "Man Enough" remark . Your arguments here are circular, trying to justify your own POV. It is a personal decision to go for love or arranged marriage.
Obviously, you are just assuming what you have written is correct. Think about it; it is not true (red above. hint: Desi culture)
I’m not sure how my argument is circular. I’m not saying that men prefer arranged marriages over love marriages, I’m simply saying that for the most part, women seem to understand that how you meet your spouse has nothing to do with the success of a marriage while men don’t understand that and keep coming back and posting rubbish about love marriage vs. arranged marriage.
My POV is simply that every circumstance is different, every individual is different, every personality is different, and different methods of finding your spouse work for different people, to condemn one or the other is simply asinine.
again not having the time means your not capable of finding someone yourself. what other reasons apart from compromises…would people choose arranged marriage for?
