Re: Arranged marriage - First Meeting
hi everyone!
Will share my my own experience. Am born and bred in the US and am abt to marry my fiance InshaAllah in a couple of months. Mutual family friends introduced our families for potential rishtas a lil more than a year ago. On our first meeting my family went to his famlies home and so did the mutual family friends. Before dinner was casual conversation--all of the families gathered together. It was during dinnertime that a couple of aunties sat me and my now fiance together and helped break the ice with very general and casual conversation--mostly about food--this tastes good, that tastes good. What do u like to do in your free time etc etc? Then a little while later the Aunties just left usa side dinner table (this was in the kitchen away from the rest of the guests) and allowed us to talk--again very general--nothign abt rishtas. I didnt even know his name or age until we got to their home and thats when I found out that we went to the same uni and same mosque as well.
A couple of days later we talked on the phone for the first time, then after that it was once every two weeks for a few months. It was during this time that we realized that we ar compatible and would like to be in a relationship (then baat pakki hui thi). After baat pakki hui--we were allowed to date unsupervised. Had lovely dinners, watched movies together, met each others friends (this would happen once or twice every month). All in all it took more than year to become "more than friends"--because things develop slowly and gradually--we got to know each other as ppl first, then friends, then best friends, now future spouses.
The reason why I put this story is tht on GS ive heard so much abt arranged marraiges and fears....for any marriage just think Allah mian brought that person as gift for you and an arranged bond is just as strong as any other marriage and there is just as much respect and love for that person. Hope this inspires you guys:)