The reason the boy's family is often worse than the girl's family is because of the power situation. The girl goes to live with the boy's family so she is the outsider, the outnumbered one. She has to fit in with them. The boy is more important than the girl in desi culture to begin with anyway and many desi moms treat their sons like the sun shines out of their sons' behind. The boy's family has more status in rishta negotiations than the girl's. It's a power thing. The wife's position in the family is all about accommodation, and the husband's is all about "leadership" (control).
That said, my in-law's were a mixed bag, just like my family is a mixed bag. My saas was very nice to me. Ridiculously so sometimes. My susr was a meanie and a snob. My husband turned out to be a compulsive liar (and a cheat) and so he is no longer my husband, but I have good and bad feelings for/memories of my in-laws. They were all individuals, with their individual quirks, failings and achhaiyan.
yes ALL are bad. When you come here, you think Allah has cursed Pakistani Males, Pakistani Inlaws. As if the inlaws of the gores are so GREAT and so PERFECT!
My MIL and SIL said to my fiancy that we want to book 'ZARAS' beauty salon for the reception ceremony..When my fiancy called me and said about this i shouted loudly , then because of my shouting he thought that may be ZARAS is really a worst one ..That's why he told his mother that please ask ur DIL about the makeup and everything...In this way i 'll book saba ansari or may be Mona J for me :)
It's all girls on this forum, so of course we're all hearing negative things about MIL and no one here has a DIL to complain about - but that wouldn't be possible, as most of the girls here think the DIL are perfect and only the MIL are nasty.
My MIL and SIL said to my fiancy that we want to book 'ZARAS' beauty salon for the reception ceremony..When my fiancy called me and said about this i shouted loudly , then because of my shouting he thought that may be ZARAS is really a worst one ..That's why he told his mother that please ask ur DIL about the makeup and everything...In this way i 'll book saba ansari or may be Mona J for me :)
Maybe they don't know about the differences between the salons?
I treat my daughter in law like my own daughter and so does my wife and she loves us to bits as well. We joke in the family that she is our daughter and our son is our son in law. It is a matter of how you deal with each other and how much love and respect you show for each other. From day one I treated her the way I would like my own daughter to be treated once she is married. In our culture the girl comes into a new family and it is the responsibility of that family to make her feel welcome and comfortable and if you do that she will respond positively as well. I couldnt have asked for a better daughter in law.
Yeah aliyahali may be u r right ! I think their taste of likeness is different.Dat'swhy they suggest zaras ..Well i know Zaras is also good but it will be my valima so i think my decision should be consider but they decided about it by themselves .I dont have any problem with my FIL.He is really a good man and likes me tooo much :)
It's all girls on this forum, so of course we're all hearing negative things about MIL and no one here has a DIL to complain about - but that wouldn't be possible, as most of the girls here think the DIL are perfect and only the MIL are nasty.
In laws are also human beings so just like every human being cant be good/bad, so can't they be. Everyone should go into their new relationships with a new mind without any preconcieved notions, will do them good and save them from alot of unneccesary trouble.
from reading these threads on life1 i get the idea that most ppl dont really have nice things to say about their in laws but are in laws really that bad and i was reading in another thread about how if we put ourselves in their shoes and see it from their prespective how would we feel.
i am sure most of u have sister in laws or brother in laws, so if they were complaining about you what would u do?
I treat my daughter in law like my own daughter and so does my wife and she loves us to bits as well. We joke in the family that she is our daughter and our son is our son in law. It is a matter of how you deal with each other and how much love and respect you show for each other. From day one I treated her the way I would like my own daughter to be treated once she is married. In our culture the girl comes into a new family and it is the responsibility of that family to make her feel welcome and comfortable and if you do that she will respond positively as well. I couldnt have asked for a better daughter in law.
I treat my daughter in law like my own daughter and so does my wife and she loves us to bits as well. We joke in the family that she is our daughter and our son is our son in law. It is a matter of how you deal with each other and how much love and respect you show for each other. From day one I treated her the way I would like my own daughter to be treated once she is married. In our culture the girl comes into a new family and it is the responsibility of that family to make her feel welcome and comfortable and if you do that she will respond positively as well. I couldnt have asked for a better daughter in law.
MashaAllah. May Allah swt showers His countless blessings on you and your family. May He bless you all with eternal and everlasting happiness. aameeen!