who gets along really well with their inlaws? raise ur hands please
I think when people make a genuine effort to be nice to one another and make each other feel as comfortable as possible, things work out for the best
It also helps if you’re mature, and know when to stop listening to other people and go with your instincts. I dunno if its education that makes the difference.. personally i think its your tarbeeyat and your understanding of the bigger picture..
In our culture you not only marry your spouse but his/her family as well. You are expected to be 'there' in their khushi/ghami. Anyone who enters a marriage considering inlaws as a baggage has a shallow attitude from 'eastern standards'.
Same goes for the inlaws.. if they are not very welcoming or are intruding, they need to act more mature and understanding.
Getting married doesn't guarnatee maturity, patience and success. Every tom, Dick and Harry gets married but do they understand family values?
exactly... marriage requires maturity and understanding.
personally, i think the notion some parents or people have that maturity comes with marriage.. is totally wrong. It should be, marriage comes with maturity..
people need to be less judgemental and more understanding. You cant always get ur way... but the more effort you put in to be understanding and caring, the better things will be for you in the long run..
sadzzz, I beg to differ. I personally know of many cases where the bahus have been excellent, but the saas' have made it a point to ensure that things turn bad. On the other hand, I've come across great saas' who have had horrible bahus.
Also, having an educated saas also plays a big role in her behaviour towards the bahu and vice versa.
hmm i dunno Sadiyah. I dunno if its education that makes the difference. Maybe education as in knowing about the world, being open minded, that makes the difference.. a degree or some certificate means zilch in my books..
again, as i said, it requires maturity, understanding and patience from all sides...
Sadzzz,is this some round about way of saying," I am educated, and i have tarbiyat , i am mature, and i dont listen to people and go with my instincts. I understand the bigger picture and i make genuine effort. i also make my inlaws feel comfortable and basically I am just perfect, thank you please?"
Sadzz, Suroor and Maniac haha! It’s funny app teenoN ki abhi rukhsati nhin howi…but I am glad at least you are entering with a positive frame of mind. I bet you will get brownie points from your significant others. No hang ups, conditions etc..which is good.
People don’t necessarily have to be mushy with their inlaws…as long as their is mutual respect among the bitches..life should be good
fayz: i interact with my inlaws almost every other day. i doubt i'll ever be living with them or in a joint family system.. so rukhsati or no rukhsati, it doesnt matter that much.
its all about respecting each other. the way i see it, if i won't respect my husband's parents , he won't respect my parents either and obviously i wudn't want that.
oh and my mother get along with my dad's family pretty well. my dadiyaal walay still look up to my mom for advices n such and give her great respect. she is my role model, and thats exactly the kind of relationship i want with my inlaws as well of good understanding and respect.
contrary to the norms, me n siblings are actually more closer to my dad's side.
aren't we witnessing this type of threads quite often now ....not that its a bad thing:)
well, i agree with sadzz ....degrees n certificates usually don't mean much ......its all about being mature n co=operative
i've said it before n i'll say it again .....ihave the excellent experience with my in-laws mashaAllah....n we have lived together as a joint family for two years .....then i moved out of pak ......my mil isn't educated but she is a wise wise woman ....i've learned quite a lot from her.......
n mashaAllah .....i thank my Allah , for these evil bahus n evil in laws stories are still alien to us lot.....we hear them but Alhamdulillah never experienced them
I have good relationship with my MIL/Inlaws, it just got better rukhsati, but I dont live with them nor can I, I'm just too independent to be living under someone.
