another guys perspective on married life and managing family stuff

umm look dont read my words here as verbatim for what I said to them but that was essntially the message. I am a grown up, let me run my life, if there are issues, until everyone understands each others temprament, just give me your advise, concerns.

what HAQ btw? what HAQ has anyone to tell anyone anything? its this HAQ thinking that gets ppl in trouble, does every elder then have a HAQ to tell everyone younger anything at anytime in any manner?

Elders dont have a 'right' but a 'privilege' and it is a privilege that must be exercised responsibly and keeping in mind the wishes and personalities of the people that elders are giving advise to. There is no gustakhi in establishing ground rules. As a matter of fact that is part of one being an adult.

the asool works well in "humara muashara" as noted by other people in this thread.