my favourite aunt is half german n half columbian and she is better than the 60 other aunts i have n she is having a perfect life.all that matters is u shud have strong willed husband who wud break evrybodys jaws.besides have confidence in urself .i have a hard time believeing that someone who already is in luv n has made a decision wud backoff just becoz of dumb people who r unable too look n more importantly feel beyond their orthodox oriented cultural views.JUST DEFY EVR1 N LIVE UR LIFE
I think there is nothing wrong if an American & a Pakistani are in Love. At least two people here who answered you are married with non Pakitani (European) females & living happily.
So has far as the Pakistani partner loves you & is honest with you its fine because then he will stand by you. So I hope u will stand by him. That matters. Rest, well u know everyone has a tongue in the mouth but "barking dogs seldom bite".
Good luck & be happy.
It is fine! But beware that Pakistani may want you to convert to Islam!
My love and i have spoken on this subject,he has read the bible (part of college program i think) and knows my values,and morals…Mind u im not perfect christian,(no one is).But from what ive seen and read of the quaran(*spelling?)It is not so bad.I have told my fiance that i am considering becoming christian-muslim.
Now someone is bound to ask me what that may mean,or how can i be both.Ive been reading of others who have embraced both teachings. There are some small differences in what each of them teach..im not saying we wont have difficulties at some point,but im willing to learn .I know much has been said on the topic of how people like me will deal with such things as holidays and such.I dont mind if he dont celebrate my holidays,and he doesnt mind if i dont celebrate his either,but the choice is left to ourselves..Im not in this relationship to change him,nor does he want me to change.We are very open with each other on a great many subjects. (cant wait to marry him)
http://www3.pak.org/gupshup/smilies/smile.gif
thanks for the concern…love being a part of this family..
Chrissy,
do what your heart tells you.....even religions can be solved. After all religion is an instrument to live a good life and not the other way around.
Chris:
One thing that you and your prospective partner may want to iron out right from the beginning is the upbringing of kids (when they may come). I have heard of conflicts arising immediately afterwards and lack of foresight by both partners results in some major problems to family.
Religion & name (yes, that has known to cause problems) are some of the key issues which should be discussed.
Finally, best of luck to you both. Just so that you know, there are many happily married cross-culture; cross-religion couples. So it has been proven to work. Just needs a little extra doings from both parties.
Statistically Muslim men + non muslim women usually end up as a muslim family. See imran khan?
In fact prophet Muhammed, encouraged muslims to marry non-muslim women and convert them to Islam.
You can't be a christian muslim. Islam does not permit that. Jesus is simply not the way! allah is the way!!
And it is easy to divorce you after marriage.
Islam permits a man to marry 4 women at the same time.
But last but not the least, if you don't care for the religion, then you can boldly do whatever you plan with this guy. If you are a religious christian, you may wish to think abt this.
[This message has been edited by kumarakn (edited March 19, 2002).]
Chris they shouldn’t be any problems, I have an uncle who married a Protestant Christian, she dresses modestly so that helps, our relatives every where accept her as part of the family, they seem to be getting on just fine they even have a 16 year old son.
Kumarakan man you idolaters are full of hatred for Islam…It seems from posts that your knowledge of Islam is limited to hate sites and the media
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Yes because Islam is so beautiful, simple and easy to follow it appeals to ones heart and intellect.
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No one is putting a gun to any ones head and converting them by force are they?
There is no compulsion in religion. The right direction is henceforth distinct from error. And he who rejecteth false deities and believeth in Allah hath grasped a firm handhold which will never break. Allah is Hearer, Knower [Qur’an 2:256]
Yes we, as Muslims do like to invite people to Islam not because we get a kick out of it or anything but because we want our fellow human beings to experience the sweetness of faith, so that they could live decent lives and achieve salvation, be saved from the fire of hell. It’s natural for a hubby who loves his non-Muslim wife to want to convert her so that she can be saved from hell in the after life.
Ditto! The only way to salvation is by worshipping God/Allah alone Muslims don’t believe in the trinity/divine incarnation.
We believe Jesus Christ (Peace and Blessings of Allah be upon him) was one of the mightiest Prophets of God but not part of God.
And ur point is??? why make it hard to divorce if the couple can’t get along?
Polygamy is allowed in Islam not just to satisfy lust, but mainly for the welfare of widows and orphans. The husband should be able to treat all his wives equally if he can’t do this then he’s suppose to marry only once. I think he also needs the 1st, 2nd etc. wife’s permission before he can marry again. Some men in the west have extramarital affairs anyway and I’m sure mistresses would prefer being second wives so at least they don’t feel as though they’re being used. Also I think all the Prophets (PBUT) from the Abrahamic religions had more than one wife except Christ (PBUH) because he hasn’t married yet. Some Christians even allow polygamy at least Islam puts a limit on the number of wives we can have at once.
What about children chris-wazir? Is your plan in rearing them as Christians, Muslims, or a combination, or leaving it up to them?
Some people do this but I personally think its ridiculous - the parents divide up the kids and say this one will be muslim this one will be that and that one will be muslim and that one will be that...
Statistically Muslim men + non muslim women usually end up as a muslim family. See imran khan?
They would say it happens because Islam is soo beautiful!
In fact prophet Muhammed, encouraged muslims to marry non-muslim women and convert them to Islam.
They would say it is because your husband loves you and wants you to save from Their Hell.
** You can't be a christian muslim. Islam does not permit that. Jesus is simply not the way! allah is the way!! **
Yes, and they would say you can't have any other non-Islamic opinions/belifs as well
** And it is easy to divorce you after marriage. **
What I meant was, he will divorce you if he doesn't like. Remember Azharuddhin, he wanted to marry this actress, so one fine morning, she shocked hid wife that he divorced her.
** Islam permits a man to marry 4 women at the same time. **
It is because in their society (according to them) has more women who are orphaned or widowed. (but will anyway marry more than one women).
Oh! I forgot, you don't have to worry, he will treat all his wives equally.
Well as always religion is a very controversial matter.Wars have been started on this topic alone...
Each person has their own viewpoint of how they see religion.
Im not here to debate this subject,for in the end we all will face god/allah and be judged.I choose to follow however god leads me in this path of life.
My plan is to read the Quaran,and learn as much as possible.
But as one kind person pointed out to me this Quote:
[al-Baqarah 2:62] Surely, those who believe, those who are Jewish, the Christians, and the converts; anyone who (1) believes in GOD, and (2) believes in the Last Day, and (3) leads a righteous life, will receive their recompense from their Lord. They have nothing to fear, nor will they grieve.
This is why i say i can be both christian and muslim.
My sweetheart has not asked me to convert,nor do i want to convert him to be a christian.As i said,we all have to follow how god leads each of us...God preplanned this life didnt he? Well he loves us all, and in time if we listen we will all know what path is the right one,even if it takes us to our dying day to find the right answer.
As for children,i have 3 from a previous marriage.My sweetheart knows this. Yes we plan to have more.
HOw will we raise them.The best we can,by showing them both sides of this world.Isnt life about learning? And in the end,dont we all make our own choices?
Marriage is based on a partnership,but also based on individuality.I was not put here on this earth to take on someone elses opinion,nor am i to force mine on someone else...but to learn what we can from the examples in life we see around us and conclude our own opinion....
Wish you all the best! Keep us updated if you wish to!
Chris-
Best wishes to the 2 of u.
[This message has been edited by Muni (edited March 22, 2002).]
[quote]
Originally posted by kumarakn:
**And it is easy to divorce you after marriage.
Islam permits a man to marry 4 women at the same time.
[This message has been edited by kumarakn (edited March 19, 2002).]**
[/quote]
If you marry a hindu, and if he dies, his relatives will burn you alive with him.
So if you are marrying a muslim, u might end up having a second wife for ur husband, but if u marry a hindu, u'll end up burnt alive.
What are u guys talking about?
1) Islam permits four marriages but did u ever go through the conditions, or in what circumstance those four marriages are allowed?
2) OK "SATTI" is there in hindu religion but when was it practised last? (dont tell me the case in early 90s in India, the people responsible were charged & convicted).
Chris dont listen to the voices coming from the different corners ... I think you are rationale enough to judge & situation & make the decision.
Regards.
hi criss,
i know many ppl in cross culture marriages, its worked for them, hopefully it works out for u.
sorry cant be bothered followin the thread.
carry on.
[quote]
Originally posted by Muni:
** Reza, what do u call "salan" in English. I thought that Salan was curry. I don't know what vindaloo is but that seems to be a regional dish, and remember India is much more diverse than Pakistan. **
[/quote]
I mean to say that Indians live on curry basically. Most of the food they eat during their life is curry and most eat vegetables whether they are relegious vegetarians or not and its mostly the same all over India. In pakistan people dont eat currys in every meal of the day. I think that fact is quite visible by how the indians weigh.
[This message has been edited by reza khan (edited March 22, 2002).]
Dear Chris;
I know many Pakistani men married to american women , and mostly their relationship work pretty well.
it's just like other marriages.. offcourse risk is always there.... but decision is yours.
wish you good luck..
where in NC you live???
all gone!
http://www3.pak.org/gupshup/smilies/tongue.gif
[This message has been edited by Muni (edited March 25, 2002).]
[quote]
Originally posted by secret_obsession:
**Dear Chris;
it's just like other marriages.. offcourse risk is always there....
Risk???
where in NC you live???**
[/quote]
Well lets just say im not far from Charlotte,its in the center of the state,southern section.......
and thanks for the encouragement on my sweetheart and me......
I have special request: that maybe others will include me in their prayers that his parents will accept me...They dont know about me yet....which makes me sad...but im hopeful in the future...
~~~``~~~~~~~
love is grand