Am I taking a really extreme step?

Uh, I never mentioned anything about a divorce and this is no reason to divorce someone.
I am talking about the manners and adaabs of a marriage- a wife treating her husband like this is ridiculous, regardless of whatever the reason is. She needs to stop acting like a child, and more like a mature wife and mother who should learn to sort out problems in her marriage. I'm sure he himself is okay with 2 kids and not looking to babysit a third one. Islamically, your husband is the head of the household and deserves respect which certainly doesn't come from silent treatments and abandoning of chores. I don't see why he should be going to her to resolve issues, she needs to realize it too and put her ego aside to patch up.