Sir, I admire your study of the Ahmadiyya movement but because you want to find flaws in our beliefs, you have made many assumptions not fit for a fair researcher.
For example, your observation that "he felt like God" is clearly a satanic idea is wrong. God becomes hands and feet of his true servant according to a Hadith e Qudsi. Quran also says that the hand that took Bai'at of the believers was not that of Holy Prophet (saw), but God's own. There are many instances in Sufi literature which supports this view and thus can not be found objectionable.
This links in with the idea of death giving way to spiritual life. Again, you have assumed that this is somehow a stolen idea. But it has its sound basis in the Quran. Bai'at, an established custom in Islam is literally selling one's soul to God. i.e., assuming a death like state in material sense. Quran speaks of Martyrdom as a form of eternal life. One kind of martyrs are those who die in the way of Allah i.e., in wars etc. But the wider definition of Shaheed is of a person who witnesses the Glory of God and thus gains eternal (spiritual) life and this title is not reserved to the fallen of holy wars. There are also many instances where life and death cycle in nature is compared to spiritual rejuvenation of people. I can not see how you find this idea alien to Islam.
The female analogies of pangs of labour, transformation which happens from embryonic states to a fully grown man etc are all spiritual analogies. Mullah considers such analogies as filth, but to be fair, we all are product of such physical processes and there is nothing wrong with drawing analogies as there is nothing dirty or wrong with them. Many Ahadith draw analogies between mothers emotions and God's love for his servants. Quran calls all believers to be the likeness of the wife of Pharoah and mother of Jesus (as)..
As for Tonic wine, opium, cocaine derivatives etc.. these all were and are used as halal medicinal products. If you go to a dentist you get a shot of coccaine in your gums.. Sufferers of severe pains get opiods in all muslim countries and alcohol is a carrier of many medicines in all systems of treatment.
And a few corrections.. The father of Mirza Sahib was not a lawyer, but a land owner. Mirza sahib did work in courts of law in Sialkot, but his argumentative skills were derived from Quran and a well established Islamic tradition called Ilmul Kalam. I find in his words many jewels of wisdom, which you can also find if you read them with the right questions in your mind. For example, ask yourself what could be the answer to the Danish cartoons and then read his discourses on Jihad and the life of Holy Prophet (saw).. You will find plenty of responses which will open your eyes to the beauties of Quran.
The notions of Jihad and violence which still prevail in orthodox muslim minds has been dealt a heavy blow when Sayed Imam Abdulaziz al-Sharif, the intellectual father of Al-Qaeda, Islamic Jihad etc etc recanted from his beliefs and issued a detailed series of edicts explaining the true Islamic Jihad. No surprises here as most of his arguments seem to agree with what Mirza Sahib wrote more than a hundred years ago. It is not British who needed a peaceful movement in Islam. Infact they would have and still are benefitting from the fool hardiness of the Mullah. How they have managed to attain control of muslim lands is not the fault of peace loving muslims or even corrupt leaders, but it is the foolishness of the Mullah who has literally said "aa bail mujhay maar" ..
There is an increasing number of scholars who now vocally preach peaceful Jihad. Many stress on the need of Khilafat and there is a growing number of scholars who consider Jesus (as) to have died. Why would the colonial British support a movement which in effect killed their God?
Peace Destino
Well I must hand it to you that you have indeed got the knack for sobriety in your discourses. It is not my duty to convince or argue. I understand that there are some answers to our said things but I also feel some things do not come close. Reflexive logic can be a dangerous thing, especially when talking about God. We can leave it there enough for you to really think about the overall message of Mirza Ghulam Ahmad and how it compares with the overall message of Muhammad (SAW).
The nature of prophecy and its fulfilment in the past compared to the stretched definitions in these days in order for forced fulfilment is telltale of foul play. We can bring in metaphor where ever we like and we can quite simply turn definitions on their heads, but we need to do so making sure we have not become something totally different in the process. The main cause of sects in dogma are not due to the literal word but due to how it is interpreted.
From reading the more contemporary works of Ahmadis I can see a consistency of what would be called a denial of miracles, but to you our stance would seem like sourcery and magic. I can assure this is not the case regarding miracles. When I hear of them I can see before my eyes the might of Allah (SWT). There is no reason why there should be allegory or metaphor in simple narrative of past events.
We can read the hadith and Qur'an without having to raise an eyebrow, sometimes we may be confused but it becomes a phenomenon too often trying to rack ones brains to make sense of the writings of Mirza Ghulam Ahmad. The styles are very different and the motives too, these are points that need to be 'realised' not argued. I like others invite to openness and unbiased study.
Some of the things drawn in comparison by Mirza Ghulam Ahmad such as association to Maryam (AS) has never been done by Muhammad (SAW) neither literally nor in metaphor. You see if 90% of what you say resides in mutashabihah how can anyone know for sure?
Jihad is about struggling against oneself. The oneself in this matter is part of oneself that draws us away from our principles on the grounds of personal comfort and selfish desire. Muslims are raised for peace and love, so it truly is a Jihad for them to fight, especially when the need the arrises. Instead of reducing the whole Muslim ummah to 'mullahism' one needs to view the aqeedah with serious intent to unify and agree on terms. It is not the nature of a prophet for example to claim to be like or feel like God, regardless of the metaphoric intent of the words. Can you see this?