Inna mal aamal o bin niyyate
Bayshak aamal ka daro madar niyyaton par hay
There are about 98% or even more of the shias, who physically hurt themselves for matam. We should therefore consider the fact that the ones who do these are no more than a very teeny tiny %age.
I have seen a far more common matam like act or BAN that is done by the people whose someone from their near and dear ones is dead. no one ssteps out to stop them from doing that. The shia azadari is keeping the Karbala alive by reminding everyone about it. Shedding tears in the remembrance of Ahl e Bait and the martrydom of Imam Hussain a.s. is far superior than crying for some worldly grief.
And who knows, Khuda ko kab kis waqt kisi ka kya amal pasand aa jay.
Qatl e Hussain(a.s) asl mein marge yazeed hay
Islam zinda hota hay har harbala kay baad