I am a fairly liberal guy and married a fairly liberal girl. I clean up my act a little in ramadan but then go back to the usual non-religious state. This time around I noticed that while I transitioned off the very next day - the wife has yet to do the same. I would like to be supportive in her new efforts - but at the same time part of me is thinking what if she keeps heading in this direction and becomes more conservative with time and starts doing hijab etc.
Its a difficult subject and I dont plan to discuss it with her. Can there be a happy medium where I can continue my choices and she hers. Are there any tips on dealing with a more religious spouse.
Just curious but is there a reason why a spouse becoming religious would be a turn off?
I think the term religious has become a sort of bad word for people. Lots of girls who are religious are actually really fun, energetic,and also ambitious.. are you worried she will kinda be super serious and suddently boring?
What is wrong with you people? What is so trollish about this question? Other than inviting the wrath of the hijabi hit squad. He said he is not religious and hence married a like minded lady. Now she is becoming more inclined towards religion, and perhaps that is why he is a bit concerned.
Well dude, perhaps you could talk to her about whats going on in her head, and share whatever concerns you have with her. I don't know maybe you guys will work something out. Well at least you will be on the same page with regards to these matters. If her reasons are convincing enough, that might also make you a part of the transition. It is always good to ask questions and learn.
Or.....you could corrupt her even further and bring her back to the darkside. Force the transition and ensure it sticks! It is a matter of life and death and you are a damn Sith Lord.
Use ur husband's right n stop her from all her activities reg religon or threat to divorce her and marry a mod girl, non-hijabi n nonpracticing, better a non-muslim. so the chances of her getting into religion will be minimum.
Use ur husband's right n stop her from all her activities reg religon or threat to divorce her and marry a mod girl, non-hijabi n nonpracticing, better a non-muslim. so the chances of her getting into religion will be minimum.
Use ur husband's right n stop her from all her activities reg religon or threat to divorce her and marry a mod girl, non-hijabi n nonpracticing, better a non-muslim. so the chances of her getting into religion will be minimum.
Can't tell if you are joking, but a husband does not have Islamic rights to stop his wife from being a better Muslim.
I am a fairly liberal guy and married a fairly liberal girl. I clean up my act a little in ramadan but then go back to the usual non-religious state. This time around I noticed that while I transitioned off the very next day - the wife has yet to do the same. I would like to be supportive in her new efforts - but at the same time part of me is thinking what if she keeps heading in this direction and becomes more conservative with time and starts doing hijab etc.
Its a difficult subject and I dont plan to discuss it with her. Can there be a happy medium where I can continue my choices and she hers. Are there any tips on dealing with a more religious spouse.
What you say is terrible. You shall not escape the minions of narrow-mindedness and idiocy!
BTW, what do you mean "cleaned up my act in Ramazan"? I suggest you do it like me. Pray 5 times (all year round), no alcohol, zakat, hajj and fasting. Be a generally good human being. Everything else goes :p
Turn off is a strong word. I guess its more about comfort level. After living a lifestyle 30 some years - its what I am comfortable with. Perhaps its a fear of the unknown that bothers me.
Would a lot of girls be comfortable with a guy changing after marriage? Say with a long beard... turban, shalwar kameez like the tableeghi folks - that too in sub-urban america? Say it aint so.
Just curious but is there a reason why a spouse becoming religious would be a turn off?
I think the term religious has become a sort of bad word for people. Lots of girls who are religious are actually really fun, energetic,and also ambitious.. are you worried she will kinda be super serious and suddently boring?
Not about asking her to change/not change, but the differences you're noticing and your fears about it. Figure out what you two agree on and move from there.
I find that even in disagreements, there is usually a place where two people can agree on. Once you understand that and where the other person is coming from, it is a lot easier to accept them for who they are.
My advice as a "used to be fairly liberal minded but now very religious" wife (alhumdulillah) is that if you value your relationship you should try to follow in her footsteps. Start becoming more religious yourself as well. Because believe me religious wife and non-religious hubby do not go well together and sooner or later problems could start arising. I would reccommend watching Islam channel and especially Peace TV. You can learn a lot from these sort of channels but also read the quran with translation. Its in your best interest in every aspect of your life in this life and in the next inshaAllah.
My husband is as non-religious as ever and I am very religious this is causing many problems between us. I hope it doesnt do the same for you but I hope you do make the effort also.
May Allah guide us all to the right path.