One of my close friends has been engaged to a guy in Pakistan for about a year now. He has a younger sister who is married with 2 kids. Anyway, on Valentines Day my friend (being as generous as she is) sent her fiance a new mobile phone- a Samsung Galaxy S3. This cost her about $650.00 including postage but she sent it with the aim that they can then communicate on viber as calls can get costly. Anyway her fiance had to find a battery for the phone (u cant apparently post those in the mail) and he finally found one a few days ago. So he uses the mobile for 2 days they were using viber and skype etc and it was all good. Then his sister came to visit. Her hubby has recently gone to dubai with the intention of settling there. Her phone does not support viber etc. So what does she do? While my friends fiance is at work she is due to return to her in laws. This particular day she asks him to leave the S3 at home as she is expecting her hubby to viber so my friend’s fiance does. So my friend’s fiance comes home and finds that his sister has left to go back to her in laws and TAKEN THE PHONE WITH HER THAT MY FRIEND SENT HER FIANCE FOR V-DAY! When he confronted his mom about it the mom said “wo zidd kar rahi thi waapis kar daye ghi” my friend is now understandably quite upset and wants her fiance to get the phone back. But she feels as though if he asks her for it then the blame will go on my friend as the nand is used to having her way. She is very nice otherwise to my friend but in this situation the nand has behaved selfishly. What is the solution?
Re: Advice needed for a friend! Fiance/Mobile Phone
Tell your friend to stop being so childish and wrongly upset. Because she's the one who is coming across as selfish. It's just a phone and when his mom said she'll return it, she will!
If she doesn't herself then she can ask his fiance to wait for a few days and then call his sister to inquire about the phone. Tell her he needs it. Don't worry she'll give it back when her own brother talks to her.
Re: Advice needed for a friend! Fiance/Mobile Phone
Hmmm...In the first place, Your friend should deliberatly avoid calling him to make him realize that it cost her to make long distance long calls & the purpose of sending him a mobile.
Wesay he can get some cheaper version andriod for his sister, so she can viber too.Aur maybe your friend should do this good job too.I cant give you exact rates but other Samsung phones with Viber-enabled are way cheaper.
Re: Advice needed for a friend! Fiance/Mobile Phone
Was about to suggest the same as above, that guy can buy her smart phone with viber. Many affordable phones are available in Pakistan , rather If am not wrong mostly cell phones are cheaper than abroad.
Re: Advice needed for a friend! Fiance/Mobile Phone
Personally i would never ever send such an expensive mobile through postage... or even to pk ..even if it was my hubby.
I mean we all know how it goes in pk... behen nai to bhai hota hey joh expensive cheez lejata hey eventually.
I would say let her fiancee solve the problem (like the examples mentioned above) and she should stop worrying.. its just a mobile
Re: Advice needed for a friend! Fiance/Mobile Phone
Why would your friend even send her fiance something?? Isn't it the other way around? What's wrong with Facebook, WhatsApp or BBM? This is above my reasoning level.
Your friend needs to give him some time to sort all of this on his own terms. What the finance's perspective on all this? What does he want to do? He's a grown up, your finance doesn't need to tell him what to do, I'm sure he knows how he wants to deal with this situation knowing the purpose of this phone and how his sister, mother, and fiance feel about it.
Re: Advice needed for a friend! Fiance/Mobile Phone
As stated already, I don’t understand why your friend can’t chat with him through Facebook, Whatsapp etc? But I guess since she clearly has the money…it made sense to her to spend $650 on a phone for this.
As for a solution…that’s her fiance’s job. She gave him the phone as a gift…now it belongs to him. And they’re not even married yet so technically, she’s not part of his family. It is solely HIS decision on how he wants to deal with his sister regarding a piece of item that belongs to him.
Sorry but i think the nand is very selfish if she has such a need to talk to her husband y not get a phone with viber, the phone was a gift from tje op to fiance its rude to take it without informing him and without thinking of how her bro n fiance will communicate, she sounds selfish and rude
But its not uncommon for this kind of stuff to occur between bro and sis but the sis shouldnt hv been so selfish.
Re: Advice needed for a friend! Fiance/Mobile Phone
SIL showed her class nicely.
What can you possibly do in this situation. Cause a tantrum and be called greedy or materialistic or use this knowledge and prepare for similar future incidents - which will undoubtedly happen.
Also, this should've taught you a thing or two more about your future husband, his place in his family and his strength to take a stand on trivial situations.
Re: Advice needed for a friend! Fiance/Mobile Phone
Your friend is RIGHT. Its not about.... Oh, grow up, its just a mobile!! Its about the GIFT (no matter what is it) which she gave to her fiance for the communicating purpose. Why she spent $650?? its none of OUR business here... she spent because she wanted to, she spent with pure intentions and she spent because definitely she loves him and wants to be in contact with him.
The SIL is being really selfish, she should have not done such a silly mistake. A cellphone is really a personal device, with personal data in it. With personal messages. Ofcourse if the Viber is installed, then TWO vibers cant be installed at the same time. She will definitely be using the same program and that includes messages too.
Its not good for sharing the same cellphone with bro or sis especially when you are married. Its all about privacy. She should understand what kind of communication takes place when two are in love. It was so generous of her to even tolerate how the SIL was using the same device.... and now she has taken it away is such a ridiculous and silly act. She should return it asap.
I dont know why didn't her fiance spoke to his sister, he should.
Re: Advice needed for a friend! Fiance/Mobile Phone
If someone gave me an expensive gift...my fiancé...and then my sister took it...I'd be a bit embarrassed. In fact, quite. Because he gave it to me as a gift...so I could communicate with him and it was nice of him to get me something to pricey. I'd get that phone back...asap.
Re: Advice needed for a friend! Fiance/Mobile Phone
agreed here. i would be upset too if i bought such an expensive gift for my husband that someone else took for their use. SIL should of known better and her brother being older needs to get it back if he cares enough to do so. other wise if he cant' im sorry but this will probably be the least of your friends worries after marriage.
Re: Advice needed for a friend! Fiance/Mobile Phone
Hello
Sorry to hear the situation you are in. As someone stated, you should wait for some time and see if she returns the phone and if she doesn't ...then it is your right to ask for it back. I do not agree with someone else who said,...its just a phone as obviously its not just a phone because then you would not make such a fuss.
The phone itself is quite expensive and I can totally understand how hurt you must be as If I had spent that much on someone and then someone else came along and effectively stole it , it would dishearten me :(
Ever still....I don't get how people just take stuff and hope it will all be good...the phone was not that sisters and so just taking it like that...some people are just out of my grasps :p
Re: Advice needed for a friend! Fiance/Mobile Phone
My friend sent him the phone with the intention that they would use it to communicate. He used the phone for 2 days and the nand took it. The nand has two bratty kids who ruined her phone. My friend asked her fiance to get the phone back and told him she is hurt- she works hard and is not made of money so for her to send it to him wasnt just an easy task. The fiance responded with things like "shes my little sister hw can i see tears in her eyes wo zidd kar rahi thi" etc. She is a grown married woman. My friend responded with "what about hw i feel doesnt that matter?" to which he responded that she matters but his family comes first. But my friend bought him the phone for THEIR communication purposes! I feel badly for my friend she is so down and crying about what has occurred. She has stopped eating. Her fiance claims the sister will give it back but my friend seems to think that once shes gotten used to communicating via viber with her hubby shel just do "zidd" again and take it. Meanwhile my friend has to call him from here and she is also meant to be saving for when he gets here to help him settle. It is a mess The nand also keeps vibering my friend with the SAME phone intended for the fiance - the nand is being as friendly as ever but it is annoying my friend further..
Re: Advice needed for a friend! Fiance/Mobile Phone
I hope your friend has learned her lesson. Hopefully she will not send expansive gifts again. The best thing to do now is drop the topic and use skype or google talk on computers to communicate with each other. I would recommend that he should make an effort calling if they really want to talk on the phone. Besides it is cheaper from Pakistan.
But I guess since she clearly has the money…it made sense to her to spend $650 on a phone for this. 