This might be too early to post this but I would like to invite married guppies to share their experiences before, and after shadi. How did things change between them and their spouses after they got married? Did they or their spouse change significantly and if they did, what were the differences? What can be the most common arguments after getting married? What to expect, what not to expect? etc etc.
Quite a few girls are getting married soon InshaAllah so i think this thread should benefit quite a few of us. Please share any personal experiences and any words of wisdom you would like to give us.
nahi nahi toba toba me was joking, just after looking at ur thread i remembered this song from kalnayk
so yeah married guppan and guppies please share ur experience.. it is gonne help me and other single girls in future
umm from being quiet, to talknig heaps.. from being shy to totally opening up.. umm from not saying anything to blurting out anything on ur mind… just things
Sadzz and Majestic: yeah i really think i have changed since i have met him. its like i want to redefine my purpose in life etc etc. Alot of my thinking has also changed. I used to be a feminist of sorts and now i feel that when you like someone you are ready to do anything for them. Its a different sort of feeling, maybe i am not explainng it well.
^ na i get u… i used to be such a “im never doing that for him!” kinda larki.. actually i still say that, but i know its just me being an idiot.. inside im like “anything for u” (i need to be sent to some mental institute)
but yeap, those are the changes im talking about.. and i think u start thinking differently. Financial things.. organising ur life.. wanting to do things to make everything “perfect”
Piyari: The big day is to be sometime in August InshaAllah. Please remember in your duas.
LuxI: I dont know if its normal or not, it sure is different and feels wonderful Alhamdulillah :D
Memsaab: how does it depend on who you are marrying or whether it was love, AM or forced? In my case it was arranged but love at first sight MaashaAllah. So the arranged part doesnt even bother me. :)
Ira, thats wonderful.. but what I meant.. was a wedding experience.. totally depends on the person you're gna marry coz there's no wedding without 'that' person is there?
So the experience.. of shopping, wedding day, enjoyment.. life changing going's on - depends on who you're marrying.
First off, congratulations to everyone who is about to get married.
May Allah SWT bless your unions, ameen.
Things are different after marriage because you start living with your spouse and obviously living with someone is different from visiting them - not only do you see them every day, you learn about their daily habits, thoughts, lifestyle, and more importantly expectations.
I don’t know anyone who changed significantly.
I think the most common arguements have to do with housework. A few of my friends got really ticked off at their husbands because they weren’t doing as much housework as they would have wanted them to do (both of them work full-time). Another friend complained her husband was disorganized and he left his socks everywhere. The couples ended up making a schedule for housework, taking turns doing things and that’s how they resolved the problem. Other common reason for arguements: jealousy.
Words of Wisdom (and i can’t stress these enough!) The key to a successful relationship is communication. You’re not perfect so don’t expect your spouse to be.
People change over time, but not drastically. There are some adjustments. You argue politely the first two years over space in the closet and what spot the toothbrush goes in and how loud the TV is. In the third year, it is "how many times have I asked you to/not to _____."
Most it is just adjusting to having another person in your private and personal space all the time. That is the hard part. Another thing is instead of making decisions alone, having to put them off until the two of you reach an agreement, if you ever do and part of that is knowing when the battle is not worth a victory. In other words, knowing when to let go and when not to.
The rest is pure bliss (especially the snuggling part).
Congratulations also to all planning on getting married. May you all be blessed.
… lol nai nai just playin !!!
(i need to be sent to some mental institute)