Re: Admit it, are you skin colourist???
I think its more about over all personality . Color is usually the last thing a man will fall for . I have this black girl in my class and she is totally stunning or may be its just how she talks . So polite and nice . :@:
Re: Admit it, are you skin colourist???
So everyone has their own preferences, we r being honest and some prefer brown, some white... BUT... then what explaination can we give for people who specify that the potential wife / groom should be fair? Or is it just the aunties who have this complex?
I like guys who are not that fair. I like them tanned or little on the darker side.
For friendship with girls - I have noticed I was not partial to fair or dark skinned girls... but I realized that my so called friends in college encouraged me to stop being friends with people who were overweight, people with glasses, people with darker skin.
I was stupid to ignore one of my dearest friend because she was fat and wore glasses. She was a genuine person. I felt I had to stop hanging out with her because my friends always made fun of her - I would tell them to shut up - but they wouldn't. I regret making the wrong decision - and keeping those losers instead of a gem of a person my friend was.
Can't change history.. but I would definitely ask her for forgiveness because I ignored her to "fit" in the circle. Such loser =(
Not a loser anymore, at least u had the maturity and goodness to admit it. I wonder what that girl is doing now.
Re: Admit it, are you skin colourist???
We been ruled by Britishers for 100z of years and we always had inferiority complex about us being brown. We somehow started thinking that white is a color of superiority. The same thing happened with Africans. I won't attribute it to only rishta situation.
I think with education and more intermingling of societies this situation will get better.
The whole potential husband/wife being gora is us Desis being Desis.
To answer the first question color doesn't matter as long as the person is well groomed. Clean nails, teeth, shoes & hair. At particular times I have found darker men or women to be more attractive than the fair ones just because of how they carry themselves.
I believe many Desis have this thing of liking for fair people more because of how we are conditioned as kids. Back home kids who are gora are considered more "pyara" just because they are gora. What the heck. I have seen many dark skinned people with such beautiful features. We hardly see any models in adds or actors or actresses who are dark skinned. Its all about what we are led to believe as children & then we grow up with that mentality.
Its like brown people wanting to be white & white people wanting to be tanned.
Doesn't matter to me at all!
I think when it comes to marriage they're thinking about kids... just like how they want someone tall.
You know, i am not sure if this whole fairness issue is caused by the british rule or whatever. I think that there is some beauty to being lighter skinned. If you take the same face, same features and make one light skinned and one dark skinned, the light skinned one is probably going to look better, all things being equal. I know this mother who is super white, and her daughter looks exactly like her but is "sawli". If you see the two, the daughter looks plain and a little village-y; but the mom looks nice and fresh faced- I think the girl's variation in skin pigmentation makes flaws more apparent, whereas the mothers' kind of blend in with her light and even skin tone.
When I am well rested, not stressed, and have a good diet with plenty of vitamins and nutrients (summer breaks!), my skin looks lighter. When I'm stressed out and studying, I my skin looks darker and duller. You could say skin color reflects health.
Also, when kids are younger they tend to be light and they get darker as they get older, so we might unconsciously link light skin to youth, just like big eyes are connected to younger appearance. Being dark skinned doesn't stop one from being beautiful, but it doesn't help a plain-looking person to be dark skinned as well. I'm just saying that skin color does play a factor in beauty, the same way as wide set eyes, straight noses, no acne, plump lips, etc do.
we're not alone in this matter- white people want to be darker- I think white people and brown people all aim to achieve that beautiful olive complexion- the perfect balance of light and dark.
Re: Admit it, are you skin colourist???
^ I think you're right about the olive skintone thing.. The global 'ideal' of beauty is said to be a medium skintone and dark hair, not the old cliche of blonde hair and blue eyes that ppl often think..
Re: Admit it, are you skin colourist???
Hmmm.
Beauty if in the eye of the beholder, first of all.
I've seen fair skinned people with big noses, red zits, bushy eyebrows, skinny lips, small eyes.........................and all their "whiteness" does NOTHING **to hide their flaws. Even makeup will do **LITTLE to make a dramatic difference in their appearance. And I've seen AVERAGE LOOKING **dark skinned women.........whom with a little bit of makeup look **STUNNING.
I HAVE HEARD the view that "goray rang main imperfections aasani se chup jaati hain." I've heard some aunties say that directly or imply it. Once an aunty had said that her daughter's small eyes would be less noticeable since her fair skin will make up for them and hide them. And I find such views funny.
Sometimes red inflammation will stand out MUCH MORE against a white backdrop as opposed to a darker one. And I believe that as long as your eyes are working fine..............a big nose will look BIG to me......and beady eyes will look *BEADY **to me...whether they are resting on a fair skin or tanner skin. To *"chupao" **anything........one can turn to shading/concealing techniques in makeup......regardless of skin color.
This is what I find ironic. We're living in a youth-obsessed society......botox, restalyne, collagen shots..........anything to make the face look plumper and more youthful. Allah has made all different types of skin colors. And while many desis shun darker skin.......................the BIGGEST BENEFIT of dark skin is that it ages BETTER than fairer skin. Wrinkles are slow to form on darker skin and it preserves better in general. But rather than appreciate this blessing..............even desis with a slight and I mean SLIGHT TAN......freak out and rush quickly to the bazaar to buy their Fair and Lovely. It's ironic.
Re: Admit it, are you skin colourist???
It narrows down to preference. I guess we're ALL colorists to some extent or the other. Do we not notice the color of flowers, animals, cars, clothes??????? Do we not have preferences over which color of flowers we want to give someone or grow...........which color of car we'd like to buy...........what color clothes we want in our wardrobe???????????????
I once read somewhere that someone had said that the idea of some people claiming they are "color blind" is unrealistic. And I agree with that. You can't be "color blind" because you DO notice the color of OTHER things in life. You can say that you have tolerance and even appreciation for various skin colors.............but to act or say that you're oblivious to it is unreasonable.
As far as attraction is considered.........if people have preferences for height and weight and body shape........then it's not altogether unusual to have preferences for skin color. To one person, ebony skin might be appear dark and mysterious and as beautiful as the night sky. To another person, going that dark might be a deal breaker. To yet another person.....who might not initially feel attracted........getting to know the person's personality or seeing them smile could capture their interest. Everyone is different.
Preferences will always be there, no doubt. It's human nature. The problem occurs......when anything........is taken to an extreme. Such as broadcasting commercials depicting a person who gets hired.........or becomes famous.........or achieves happiness after smearing fairness cream on themselves. Or to assume that one is inferior or of LOW character or intelligence due to their skin color. That's extreme.
Re: Admit it, are you skin colourist???
Well I am fair-skinned and to be perfectly honest I am more attracted to guys who are fair. Having said that though I DO prefer a guy to have a bit of a tan (if they are too fair it looks like they have been rubbing Fair & Lovely all over themselves).
Re: Admit it, are you skin colourist???
Muzna our little dance is what makes Life 1 so special. However the comment had more substance than just a pervy one liner.
A person's skin just like their rack has no bearing on their personality, intellect or any personal attribute that I personally find attractive. To me their skin color or skin shade is irrelevant to how attracted I am to them or how I interact with them.
Each woman is beautiful in her own right and to belittle that by limiting my actions to a certain shade of skin is just ridiculous.
Re: Admit it, are you skin colourist???
I thought the OP was talking about how what affects how we deal with people in social situations NOT what we find attractive in the opposite sex.
Re: Admit it, are you skin colourist???
^ I was but then it got side-tracked...
I am fair skinned and have always been attracted to similar skin type, in fact never thought i could fancy anyone with a darker complexion and im being honest i never really gave them the time of day:snooty: however i did end up going out with someone who was darker (looked straight through him when i first met him 
)
and then i married him:sara:
So kakaballi, r u saying that if a person has insecurities about their own skin colour, this is picked up by others who interact with him / her and their behaviour is a response to the individuals own insecurities?
I'm not sure about that, bcos that's like saying that everyone who has been discriminated against bcos of their skin colour, it's their own fault???
I am saying that the people who do not have insecurities about themselves because of their skin colour are not discriminated against. I have seen Pakistani girls with fair complexion are generally much more confident and vibrant than those with darker complexion specially when they are in a group consisting of both types.
Someone mentioned south Indians but I have always found them to be much more cultured and humane than north Indians or Pakistanis. They do not have an inferiority complex just because of the tone of their skin.
Re: Admit it, are you skin colourist???
Stoppit:
If one's skin color affects how you (generic you) interact with them you (generic you) got bigger issues that need to be dealt with.
Re: Admit it, are you skin colourist???
^yeh, that's what Rupay was initially questioning. she has observed it, so why? care to give some insight to that?
I hear you CM. And most of us could see the underlying essence of your comment.
I wouldn’t have expected anything less. So my comment was about the routine, not your post alone.
On a side note…
PCG…I told you so.
^yeh, that's what Rupay was initially questioning. she has observed it, so why? care to give some insight to that?
Hooray, some one understands me!!!