Accepting gifts from the in laws during the engagement period

[Paheli00]

Re: Accepting gifts from the in laws during the engagement period

@chocolatebuttons

I don’t know where this thing of not accepting gifts from in laws unless they come by our house and drop them off came from, it is just something that we and people in our social circle have always followed. I don’t go to my in laws casually. I only ever go when there is a need to go and that is always with elders in my family with me. I am not in the habit of visiting their home without reason or alone.

I’m glad things got sorted out. I’m also engaged and visit in-laws and have gotten gifts on several occassions. Anyway, most of what I thought have already been said but I wanted to make a few comments regarding the above statements.

I understand that your family/social circles have certain traditions/norms. BUT you must also keep in mind that your future husband’s family also has their own traditions/norms. And since BOTH sides have agreed that you will soon become part of their family…when you’re visiting their home (whether its out of “need” or “casually”), there will be an expectation that you follow/respect their traditions. In addition, if the “elders” going with you do not have the authority to say “yes” to something as simple as you receiving a gift…then there’s not much point in them going with you (in my humble opinion).

There has already been one misunderstanding between you and your future MIL…and your fiance was in the middle of it. In order to avoid any more similar situations…think about whether or not you’re willing to follow THEIR traditions when you visit their home. If not, then don’t visit their home…UNLESS you’re accompanied by your parents.

Again, glad things got sorted out. Good luck w/ wedding planning!