I agree Nadz! You were hurt, but he’s not intentionally trying not to understand. Like Stoppit said there is a way to talk to someone, and as soon as you yelled him he shut down and became defensive. That’s a lesson for you for next time!
Why don’t you text him? Something small.
Now on to your last part. You cannot change your inlaws. But you can change yourself so you do not take every little thing so seriously. You will be much happier if you start to just let go sometimes.