Sorry Blackie just saw your question …
After the wedding while the girl worries or thinks about how her new relations are going to work out , similarly the inlaws also worry about how the girl will fit in and whether she will create issues or become part of the family.
Sometimes , they might say or do things that may irritate you , go against you… thats the time you hold fort and use patience and communication as your only weapons of defence.
I faced it in my inlaws , who are generally very nice people but right after the nikkah they were all on their defensive pretty much all the time … I would get picked on very small things …and some not so pleasant things happened .. the first few months were very upsetting … I didnt want to turn to husband to complain against any members of his family. Even he was influenced by some of the members …
But eventually what took me through it all was that I did not fight them , I did not complain , instead I started making an extra effort to get closer to the sisters and MIL … I felt it was a sacrifice at my end that I had to gulp down the hard bits , with no one to share my side of the story with. Not even with my own parents or friends.
It took me about two years and a few months to get on a comfortable level with everyone in his family … it mainly happened coz I totally stopped being on the defense, chose to apologize even though the fault wasnt mine, covered their mistakes infront of husband, never complained , kept smiling , did what ever they said, made an effort to get closer to them , took interest in their interests. thats what i meant by sacrifice …