*1- Make her feel secure- don’t joke about divorcing her, this will put a hole in your marriage. *
*2- Always greet her whenever you arrive *
*3- Your wife is a fragile vessel so take care of her- In this vessel there is a lot of goodness so treat her in a gentle manner. *
*4- Advice her in privacy and the best timing. Don’t advice her in the presence of others, it can be a type of humility *
*5- Be generous with her *
*6- Move out of your way for her, when she’s coming to sit get up and let her sit on your seat tell her: ‘here honey sit I warmed up the seat for you’ *
*7- Avoid anger. *
*8- Look good for her and smell great. *
*9- Don’t be rigid, you will be broken- just because you are a man doesn’t mean you have to be harsh hearted *
*10- Be a good listener *
*11- Say yes for flattering and no for arguing. *
*12- Call your wife with the best names she likes to hear. i.e: the prophet (SAW) used to call Aisha- A’ish! *
*13- Surprise her secretly. Ex: Bring her a watermelon when it’s not the season of watermelons. Pick and choose in surprising her, be an artist in surprising her pleasantly *
*14- Preserve the tongue *
*15- Accept her shortcomings/ everyone has one *
*16- Show your appreciation to her *
*17- Encourage her to be in touch with her kin relations *
*18- Speak topics of her interest. *
*19- Speak of her goodness in the presence of others *
*20- Shower her with gifts. The prophet (saw) said: give gifts and you’ll love each other’ MML It’s doesn’t matter how cheap or expensive the gift is, it’s the thought that counts! *
*21- Get rid of the same old routine once in a while, scrub the rust. Ex: Buy her ticket to a vacation cruise or something that she will enjoy. *
*22- Think good of her- husn althan- *
*23- Ignore some of the words/actions you don’t like *
*24- Add a drop of patience- It can go a long way- i.e: at her time of pregnancy, menses…etc *
*25- Expect and respect her jealousy. *
*26- Be humble *
*27- Don’t put a price on her happiness. *
*28- Help her around household chores just like the prophet (saw) did. *
*29- You can’t force her to love her in laws, but help her respect and love your parents. *
*30- Show her that she is an ideal wife; each and every wife is an ideal wife in many ways, so make her feel that. *
*31- Make dua’a for her and always remember her in your dua’as *
*32- Leave her past to Allah swt *
*33- Don’t show her that you are doing favors by doing your duties *
34- **aan/Satan is your enemy NOT your wife! **
*35- When eating, don’t only feed yourself, feed her TOO! - Not only does it go to the stomach but to the heart too. *
*36- Look at her as a precious pearl, treat her and take care of her like a precious pearl *
*37- Speaking of pearlsà show her YOUR pearlsà SMILE! . Don’t put your smile out-of-service when you reach home! Don’t be rigid, smiling is Sadaqah *
*38- Don’t hold grudges. Deal with the littlest matters and don’t ignore them, it will build up and will create a wall between you and your wife. *
*39- Avoid being harsh hearted and moody. *
*40- Respect her thinking; her thinking strengthens you. *
*41- Help her discover/develop her skills and her success within *
*42- Respect the boundaries of the intimate relationship- it’s a fragile matter. *
*43- Help her with the children; it’s not only her job it’s yours too! *
*44- Complement her!-give her the gifts of the tongues- *
*45- Don’t be a stranger to her meals, know your wife’s meals, and eat her food. *
*46- Let her know when you are traveling don’t just disappear, and also let her know about your arrival. *
*47- When arguments arise, deal with it and don’t run away from it. *
*48- Don’t share your home secrets with your friends. Keep your privacy, and don’t make it a garage sale. *
*49- Encourage each other to worship/obey Allah swt – Go for umrah together, listen to a lecture/recitation.- *
*50- Engrave her rights in your heart and in your conscious *
*51- Treat her with kindness through happiness and sorrow *
*52- Don’t jump on your wife like a ball!, in fact polish your love with many kisses- A kiss is a messenger- alqubulah rasool *
*53- When disputes happen between you and your wife, don’t go and share it with the whole world.-don’t leave your wounds open for the germs- *
*54- Show her that you care for her health. *
*55- Don’t think that you are right all the time!-No one Is perfect but the prophet (saw)- *
*56- Share you happiness and sorrow with her. *
*57- Have mercy on her. *
*58- Be the shoulder she can lean on! *
*59- Accept her as is, she’s a bent rib so don’t try to straighten it. *
**Side note: A dear friend once said: “a bent rib cannot be straightened, and in fact the beauty of it lies within its curve!” *
60- Have good intentions for your wife - alniyaatu atayibaah-
Source: Sh. Ahmed Shehab's lecture
Thanks for sharing. There's a hadith that suggests a man to smile each time he looks at his wife.