Re: 30 year old Pakistani women
I’m not being vain. I am being honest. Especially in North America, there is a shortage of eligible, educated, professional Pakistani men that would be a suitable match for eligible, educated, professional Professional Pakistani woman. As a result, we are forced to take our time and wait for an appropriate match.
The majority of us are not interested in moving to Pakistan or marrying a man from Pakistan. That leaves a very small pool behind. Men that would be good matches for us tend to marry late anyway. If you look at the average age of eligible, educated, professional Professional Pakistani men in the United States, many marry in their mid to late thirties. By then they have graduated, paid off their student loans and have established themselves in their career enough to want move on to the next phase of life.
Remember I’m not taking about a man with decent job that earns $50,000 - $80,000 a year. I am talking about men in their 30s who have established wealth. Professional women can pretty much make that on our own now after working a few years - most men prefer that the earn more than us.
So then one would say that perhaps we shouldn’t have studied so much or worked so hard. To be fair, what else are we supposed to?
I was a good girl, studied hard, lived at home with my parents and got good grades and got a good job while my family friends’ son’s were to busy slacking off. We’d see these guys running around campus, hitting on every girl that walked, partying on the weekends and skipping classes. The other family friend’s whose sons were religious typically married a girl from Pakistan because apparently us girls raised in the west are “corrupt.” (Makes me laugh, especially when I visit Pakistan and see how girls behave there.)
So guys from Pakistan wouldn’t work, guys from the States were either out of control or went back to Pakistan to find a wife. What else are we supposed to do? Stay home, watch dramas and get fat? Or go out in the world and do something productive?
So before you judge us, maybe give us a little credit. I was lucky, I found my soulmate eventually. I have so many Pakistani great female friends who are still single and it is sad. I also find it disappointing that the first person to call me vain is a female when I am just trying to provide perspective so that we can actually deal with the real issues our sisters face.