Islam made it possible for a man to have 1-4 Wives.
In Islam they approved it because of some benifits for the man and his wife…
Here are some of the common questions:
For guys, would you want to have more than 1 wife? why?
For ladies, would you accept your husband having a 2nd wife? ad would you accept bieng the 2nd wife?
What are the reasons that may lead the guy to consider a 2nd wife?
How would that affect his current family??
If a man to marry another women, would that normally lead to the divorce of the 1st wife??
If a man to marry another women, should he tell his wife before doing that? or after? (some men say a women would never accept that, so better tell her later on)
Do you know any guys who married more than 1 wife? how did it go after marrying the 2nd?? share stories…
no need to answer all the questions, just Discuss…
I would never accept and let my husband have a 2nd wife, nor would i would've liked to be somebody's 2nd wife!!
It's just strange to me and no I do't know anybody who has a 2nd wifey!!
I find it interesting, the question: should a man tell his current wife before marrying the second wife.
I presume the man would tell the potential second wife that he is married before marrying her. I find it sad that he cannot extend the same courtesy to his current wife. How is that equal? The second wife is given a choice: she may choose to be in a marriage with a man already married. The first wife is not: "honey, i got married two weeks ago, i didn't tell you before b/c you might object to it".
In Islam they approved it because of some benifits for the man and his wife... The one who approved it Allah himself and there must be a wisdom in it which people with little brain like me fail to believe
For guys, would you want to have more than 1 wife? why? If circumstances require and if I have the means to support my 2nd wife and if I can treat them equally, then yes. But if I fear that I cannot treat them equally, then only one (as instructed in Surah Nisa).
What are the reasons that may lead the guy to consider a 2nd wife? *The reason cannot be for personal benefits (such as pleasure). There are consitions set by Shariah to have more than one wife and one of them as stated in Surah Nisa is that you should be able to treat them equally. *
How would that affect his current family?? If all the family members know and follow Islam and fear Allah, then it shouldn't.
If a man to marry another women, would that normally lead to the divorce of the 1st wife?? *That depends on the first wife. If she fears Allah and knows that she cannot make something haram which is allowed by Allah himself, then she probably will not ask for divorce. *
If a man to marry another women, should he tell his wife before doing that? or after? (some men say a women would never accept that, so better tell her later on) I dunno whether you are asking from Islamic point of view or otherwise. As far as I know, a man does not have to seek his first wife's permission before marrying again. However, it is always better to do so, so that problems cannot be created later on. As for the 2nd wife, he has to tell his 2nd wife before marrying her that he is married and cannot keep her in darkness.
Do you know any guys who married more than 1 wife? how did it go after marrying the 2nd?? share stories...Prophet Muhammad (S.A.W) married more than once. His life is in front of you and that's really that matters. As for me knowing people personally, yes I do and Alhamdulillah his life is only effected in the sense that he has to divide up his time equally between his 2 wives.
is a guy able to treat his two or four wives equally though....unless he's God himself I don't think it's possible. Since the line concerning equal treatment was written with humans(very imperfect) in mind, why was the idea of multiple wives even written about.
If in the case of a disabled woman, there is a married man who feels like he wants to take care of her why does he have to marry her? Couldn't he just let her stay at his and his wife's house instead of taking her on as a second wife or just provide her with financial support in today's world?
In Islam they approved it because of some benifits for the man and his wife...
The one who approved it Allah himself and there must be a wisdom in it which people with little brain like me fail to believe
For guys, would you want to have more than 1 wife? why?
If circumstances require and if I have the means to support my 2nd wife and if I can treat them equally, then yes. But if I fear that I cannot treat them equally, then only one (as instructed in Surah Nisa).
What are the reasons that may lead the guy to consider a 2nd wife? *The reason cannot be for personal benefits (such as pleasure). There are consitions set by Shariah to have more than one wife and one of them as stated in Surah Nisa is that you should be able to treat them equally. *
How would that affect his current family?? If all the family members know and follow Islam and fear Allah, then it shouldn't.
If a man to marry another women, would that normally lead to the divorce of the 1st wife?? *That depends on the first wife. *If she fears Allah and knows that she cannot make something haram which is allowed by Allah himself, then she probably will not ask for divorce. **
If a man to marry another women, should he tell his wife before doing that? or after? (some men say a women would never accept that, so better tell her later on) I dunno whether you are asking from Islamic point of view or otherwise. As far as I know, a man does not have to seek his first wife's permission before marrying again. However, it is always better to do so, so that problems cannot be created later on. As for the 2nd wife, he has to tell his 2nd wife before marrying her that he is married and cannot keep her in darkness.
Do you know any guys who married more than 1 wife? how did it go after marrying the 2nd?? share stories...Prophet Muhammad (S.A.W) married more than once. His life is in front of you and that's really that matters. As for me knowing people personally, yes I do and Alhamdulillah his life is only effected in the sense that he has to divide up his time equally between his 2 wives.
And Allah knows best
Divorce is not haram either. And, she doesn't even have to have a "valid, approved by some scholar reason." She can choose to divorce based on not wanting to be a co-wife or any other reason. That is not her making something haram that God has made halaal the way you guys love to say. That is her exercising her right to marry, stay in the marriage, or divorce if she should choose to do so.
I hate the implication that if she divorces him based on that, that is a sin or something. No one has to stay in a marriage they don't want to be in.
For guys, would you want to have more than 1 wife? why?
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I am happy, Alhamdulillah, with my wife. I feel that at this point in my life, I can only adequately deal with having one.
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What are the reasons that may lead the guy to consider a 2nd wife?
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Here are some I've heard/can think of:
the first wife's infertility and the man wants children.
To support the second wife.
Because he has the means to support a second wife and believes he can be just to them.
Girl wants to get married and there is a lack of good proposals.
Each guy wanting to marry a second wife will probably have his own reason(s).
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How would that affect his current family??
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There would be a lot of different factors to consider, but as far as the idea of the man marrying a second wife, I don't see it being much of an issue.
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If a man to marry another women, would that normally lead to the divorce of the 1st wife??
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I know of a few marriages involving co-wives. This has not lead to any divorces as far as I know.
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If a man to marry another women, should he tell his wife before doing that? or after? (some men say a women would never accept that, so better tell her later on)
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If I were in that position, I'm thinking I would.
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Do you know any guys who married more than 1 wife? how did it go after marrying the 2nd?? share stories...
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I know a handful. From my perspective it seems fine. Then again, I almost never specifically ask friends about their relationships with their wives.
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no need to answer all the questions, just Discuss...
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Oops. I guess I didn't read the whole post before quoting and replying.
I have a kurdish friend couple. They are a very happy couple and they have one child. Recently, my friend visited back home (Iraq) without his family. Upon asking him why his family wasn't going, he responded that he is going alone because he is getting married there. Needless to say I was shocked to hear that. I told him that I had always thought they were very happy and he said they still are. He went on to say that its his wife's decision/advice for him to have a second marriage. His wife actually asked him to get married to a widow in Iraq. I asked what the reason is and he said that there are mutiple reasons:
They want to supportc/comfort the widow, etc
He wanted another child and his first wife didn't want to go throguh with having another child.
What surprised me the most was that they didn't think there was anything at all wrong with this. According to him, its very common to have more than one wife in their culture. To date, the second wife lives in Iraq and he frequently visits her. Don't know how frequent though. Just thought I would share this here.
I would not have a wife. But i dont mind a few concubines. That allows me to taste a greater range of "flavours" while not having to have the same responsibility.