Okay first of all, to all those people who are ranting against my post, let me refute your arguments and make my statement clear.
To all those girls that are talking about having their kids exposed to English customs and bad influences abroad - excuse me but have you visited Pakistan recently? And no, not as in a short trip where most of your interaction is with family and dressmakers and tailors, but actually lived and breathed the lifestyle that is Pakistan these days? Kids here (I know what I’m talking about because I’m studying here currently) are MUCH, MUCH worse. Drugs, promiscuity and drinking is rampant here in the teenage crowd. People that are living abroad are MUCH more in touch with their roots and religion, and there might be a few exceptions, but for the most part they are decent, God-fearing people. It doesn’t matter where you live, your children will be a reflection of your upbringing. If they are disrespectful, materialistic, etc, that reflects on your parenting, NOT where they grew up. And as for materialism - you haven’t seen materialism until you walk into any average Pakistani wedding/daawat and hear how women show off about their latest fancy designer outfit/handbag/car or preen about how their kids just got admission into the most elite private school available. People abroad are mostly of the middle class, and are used to treating everyone from a waiter to their boss with the same courtesy and respect.
And as for the air-conditioning point, are you seriously comparing the heat of Pakistan to that of anywhere in America /the UK? Even Miami or Houston (both of which places I’ve visited in summer so I know what I’m talking about), the dead of summer doesn’t compare ANYWHERE to the absolute melting, swelteringly and blistering heat of Karachi/Lahore. If you happen to be moving to Islamabad or Pindi, then it’s still fine, they’re more similar to the climate in the US/UK. And it’s not just about the heat. I guess none of the things I’m saying will click in your minds until you actually start living here, but trust me what I’m saying will be ringing over and over in your heads when you guys actually wake up from the rosy-posy world of love and wedded bliss and actually start facing the reality of your situation. The freedom of moving around, driving a car alone, going for a leisurely walk etc - say goodbye to all of those things. Not only is it not safe, you’ll be stared at and whistled at like a piece of meat and you’ll feel so uncomfortable and trapped that you’ll stop going out altogether. The days of going for a walk, seeing a movie, wearing jeans and a t-shirt out will be OVER, unless you get used to strange men gawking at you and passing lewd comments.
As for comparing the law and order situation to that of the system abroad, your analogies are quite laughable, sorry to say. Are you seriously trying to compare the Pakistani police to that of the police in the US/UK? The police there DON’T care about money, they do their job and if anybody commits a crime they get punished for it. Not to mention the crime rates are super-low anyway in comparison. Yesterday, 6 bomb blasts occured in Lahore. SIX!!! IN ONE DAY!! Here a police officer can be bought off for as low as 100 rupees, and if you ever go to them with a complaint, God help you if you’re a girl because they’ll treat you so cheaply and badly you’ll walk out of there feeling like a prostitute. And I know that it’s not like crimes don’t occur abroad, they do. But they are no where near the crime that occurs in Pak. You don’t have men stopping cars at traffic lights in broad daylight stripping jewellery and cellphones off of innocent women, dacoits bursting into homes robbing houses and taking away the daughters of the house to rape, or acid being thrown on wives faces with no retribution because the husbands paid off the police with some cash.
Basically, the reason why I brought this point up in the first place, was that in all of the cases that I’ve known up till now of a girl moving to Pak after getting married from abroad, have NEVER been successful. I could give you guys the benefit of the doubt if I’d heard of at least one happy marriage. But NONE. None in my family, distant family, neighbours or family friends. They’re all either separated, divorced or hanging on for the sake of the children but miserably unhappy. It’s fine if you were also born in Pak and brought up here, but for those who have been born and brought up abroad, it’s just too much to adjust to willingly. Love has a tendency to cloud one’s judgment, but you need to step back from the situation and weigh everything carefully. I read one girl on here, her sn is diamond-something, she would talk the same exact way about her engangement and I could see all the danger signs (mean MIL, arrogant fiance, huge sacrifices being made only from her end) but she kept on saying she loved her fiance and all so I hoped it would work out. Anyway, as you all know, she put up with verbal and physical abuse, gave birth to a daughter that her husband refuses to acknowledge and now is separated/divorced. Really, really, sad. I would hate to see any other girl in that predicament, so just think long and hard girls, before making such a big leap of faith.