20 Year old Pakistani Girls

Lifestyle Relationships
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When you know you won’t find many rishtay later on, why don’t you look hard..and marry… when you are in your 20’s…only to complain about it later?

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Re: 20 Year old Pakistani Girls

You** really** think shadi kerna Mard ya aurat ke ikhtiyar main hota hay? :konfused:

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Re: 20 Year old Pakistani Girls

If they wait til they're 30, they can save up for a Ubunto Kazim outfit. Don't you know?

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Re: 20 Year old Pakistani Girls

Kuch had tak. Koshish to insaan k ikhtyaar main hai…the result is kismat I guess.

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Re: 20 Year old Pakistani Girls

I am 30, and up until now, never got one rishta in my life, despite being active in the religious scene. I made the "mistake" of living at the dorms in college, which I would not trade that experience for anything in the world, since driving was 1-2 hrs drive from home to college. I was told at some party that I'm a "mod girl", and that was that. The only girls who got rishtas in my community were the ones who weren't even done with high school. My family doesn't know many families outside that circle, and with my dad holding down four jobs, he didn't have the time to take us to dawats where we could be shown off for marriage, and with all my exams, I didn't have time for it either. Guys at my college? Sure, they were marrying SAHM's pretty much all of them. The girls might have had some education, but no one was putting in long hours at work, and some of them did part time work IF they DID work. Some of those guys - their families brought over girls from Pakistan. Or there were just huge cultural differences like myself being Pakistani and guys being arabs. And that was a HANDFUL of desis in my college. Where I was, most guys went to community college OR left the state for education elsewhere.

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Re: 20 Year old Pakistani Girls

And also there was ONE family friend we had who was roughly my age, he married a peurto rican.

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Re: 20 Year old Pakistani Girls

Puerto

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Re: 20 Year old Pakistani Girls

if the guys are getting married but the girls arent, who are the guys marrying? :confused:

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Re: 20 Year old Pakistani Girls

Sure.

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Re: 20 Year old Pakistani Girls

PCG, it's okay if some aunti rejects me for knowing how to spell or for any other trait of mine. They're not obligated to like or accept me just as I'm not obligated to like/accept every rishta or anyone for that matter. I've been on the receiving end of a rejection and I've also done the rejecting for reasons others find superficial. Part of life; i don't rant about every person that turns me down. The only time it hurts me is if I invested emotional energy in a person...and with strangers...that's usually not the case, so generally I have moved on and don't dwell on it.

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Re: 20 Year old Pakistani Girls

intelligent women need to stop using their "education" as an excuse for not getting married...we were too busy with school. Just because you're a doctor (btw i am one) doesnt mean you have to marry a doctor/lawyer/engineer. What matters more is a person who respects you and will work with you to make a marriage work. So why set standards so high? Plus who cares about a doctor who's a jerk vs. a nice guy who owns a convenience store/ or just an undergrad degree is political science.
- i still think pretty grls always find suitors, no matter where they are...so i think looks play a big role.

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Re: 20 Year old Pakistani Girls

Half an hour ago I was in a circle of six friends, all between 30 and 40. Only one of us was happily married while two of us were divorced with not much inclination towards remarrying, one had a broken engagement as recently as last week, one with a mother not much interested in giving away her only son, and the last, well, he is too perplexed by others’ experiences and doesn’t know what to do.

So, you see, not many guys are getting married either.

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Re: 20 Year old Pakistani Girls

Marry in 20’s :bummer:

yes its true that rishta milna mushkil hu jata hai but aisa bhi nahi hai..kyun jo loog 24 ya 25 ke hutey hain un ki shadiyaan nahi hu rahi hain kya :cb: …lekin now a days sab 18 ya 20 tak ki hi dhond rahey hain chahey larkaa 30 ya 31 ka hi kyun naa huu :smack: oper se suney per suhaga Graduate bhi honi chahiye..tu kya duniya mae atey saath hi school mae dakhil hu jaye :omg:

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Re: 20 Year old Pakistani Girls

There are better ways to make yourself happy than some dude and kids.

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Re: 20 Year old Pakistani Girls

I've recently come to the conclusion that because I'm 21 there's no way I can even seriously consider marriage until at least 4-5 years without marrying a Oompa Loompa who doesn't know what to do with his life or a guy that has yet to finish the trecherous journey of tough schooling. Also it seems highly illogical and hasty to marry in the near future b/c neither do I have my shi-- together or a decent job. In the West there are more factors involved in getting married. Unless you have no financial obligations/ aren't academia or work inclined.

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Re: 20 Year old Pakistani Girls

Which is most of the upper class desi daughters of society. What? They don't. A lot of families have income, and properties coming in without much effort, some legal, some illegal. As long as their dads are paying for everything, they're not gonna be thinking like you are. They will just go from dad's house to husband's house, the only thing that changes is the kitchen architecture and countertop colors.

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Re: 20 Year old Pakistani Girls

Being true to yourself is one way to move forward in life. (Y)

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Re: 20 Year old Pakistani Girls

There are quite a few assumptions in your statement unless your question is directed to someone specific instead of a general query.

Anyway, if I were you, I'd probably ask girls who are 20 somethings (now) if they are looking hard and planning to get married asap or are they coming back in around 8-10 years on the forum complaining.

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Re: 20 Year old Pakistani Girls

So, basically I gather that if your not married by 22 you pretty much have no chance of getting married ,ever?! Really?. I mean don't you guys thing that's a little too young to get married? What's wrong with 26-28 yr olds? Or women older? 26 is still pretty young if you ask me. I wish this age thing was subjective, does not seem like it is, most people are just agreeing that any woman above 22 is old?! IDK. Marriage is definitely a very important part of life ,but for many , so is education and actually becoming somebody. Many want to do more than just get married , some wish to to play what they may perceive as an important role in society, and there is nothing haram in that. Sometimes things take time,maybe alota time , so does that mean if by a certain age we have not achieved all that we wished we would, we just stop everything and get married? Because if we don't,we'll never get married? Where does it say that? Many will argue you can study after marriage, some can but it's not that easy.

The reason why girls don't just get married in their 20's is well because life is not ideal,not everyone has achieved what they wished for by a certain age . Furthermore, getting married is no joke. To get married just because you've reached a certain age is silly. Even if their were to get married in their 20's the possibility still remains that the marriage might not workout , just getting married by a certain age does not make everything okay, life is not that simple. Further, looks may play an important role but at the end of the day everyone wants more than just a pretty face. Again , looks is a subjective thing and honestly,whether we like to admit it or not looks isn't something that will matter much in the long run.

Nobody knows what will happen, we maybe be able to guess from the way things work but even then nothing is certain. Heaps of people get married early and end up getting divorced, many find great people later on in life despite their age, etc. I don't think it's right to question those who did not get married in their early 20's and say you're the ones at fault. It's society that should be questioned, people who have given something such as age so much value that girls who are 25 are finding it hard to find a good proposal. Honestly what real difference is their between a 22 and 25 year old?Nothing, it's just a number. If anything girls who are older should be treated with more respect and seen as a better choice, with age comes maturity, a better understanding of life and generally more tolerance. Yes,this may be a generalization but in most cases it isn't. It's funny that no one questions people who favour someone younger over someone whose well-educated. It's society and it's shallow standards that should be questioned. Standards that have made it so hard for parents to marry off their daughters because people walk around with the longest lists and not every girl in her 20's is able to meet their standards, is singling someone out just because of age, really acceptable? In saying all that there is no point in questioning anyone. It's not like anyone can really change anything. So, as they say everyone's life partner has been decided,the point is to work on your relationship with Allah, the rest will fall into place. Hum chahye kuch bhe kar ley kise ko bhe naseeb se kam ya ziyada nahe milta hai aur har shahye apne waqt par milti hai.

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Re: 20 Year old Pakistani Girls

The thread is about those , who on account of their own free will and decision, delay their rishta and stuff.....and then moan about it later on...... if you , being an adult, mature, educated, sensible,independent woman made a decision to not look for rishtay in your 20's........then stand by it........ don't blame the system and paki men and society and whatnot........ you know all those things when you made the decision.......now time to face the consequences......... IT IS NOT DIRECTED AT THOSE WHO DO NOT MANAGE TO GET MARRIED IN 20'S DESPITE TRYING AND ACTIVELY LOOKING'