Well, I wish I could agree with you Code_Red. While I don’t have answers to most of the questions you have for the young hindus, I feel extremely sad to say that amongst the middle class muslims, simple religious values are slowly disappearing:(…
I have recently come across families where salat is not offered regularly, going for jumma prayer is not even a consideration…fasting, maybe, but fasting without the obligatory prayers…kids are growing up but no effort is being made to teach the Qur’an…and the list goes on. There are still many families who are working on establishing the values to the new generations and I guess this is how it is in every religion.
I definitely don’t mean to be judgemental here at all. The practice of religion is very personal and I have by no means “arrived” so please don’t take me wrong. This was just an observation and the funny part was that my husband and I were just discussing this a few hours ago.
You raised good points. We need to look into this topic more closely. I have made this a new topic
Let us see around us and do a little survey
Questions :
In your family and friends circle roughly what percentage of young boys and girls do not offer prayers regularly ? ( please mention % in pakistan/india and outside subcontinent separetly , if possible )
In your family and friends circle roughly what percentage of young boys and girls use bad language (swearing) in home and within family ?
In your family and friends circle roughly what percentage of young boys and girls are not chaste ? ( cross limits in relationship or otherwise )
In your family and friends circle roughly what percentage of young boys and girls drink liquor (ocasionally ) ?
What is the percentage of divorce in your family and friend’s cirlcle ?
What percentage of people in your family and friends (you know somehow) are involved in extra marital affairs ?
Re: Young Pakistanis and religious, family values (split)
I rather answer the questions without bringing countries into the picture:
1. 50%
2. Not that many
3. Don't know for sure
4. Don't know
5. I personally know 4-5 couples who got divorced last year
6. Suprisingly, I know many.
Re: Young Pakistanis and religious, family values (split)
i totally agree, Niksik.
scaling makes a huge difference as one can capture the whole spectrum.
of course, all people cannot be accounted for.
what i would say, is that those who dont pray now and dont read Quran with meaning, can begin as soon as they realize.
confusion is a big thing due to which young children and teen agers are not able to follow basic Islamic teachings.
both parents need to pay attention to be role models for their children. and there must be a family background that shows children the importance of being aware of their faith.
best,
Dushwari
Re: Young Pakistanis and religious, family values (split)
i totally agree, Niksik.
scaling makes a huge difference as one can capture the whole spectrum.
of course, all people cannot be accounted for.
what i would say, is that those who dont pray now and dont read Quran with meaning, can begin as soon as they realize.
confusion is a big thing due to which young children and teen agers are not able to follow basic Islamic teachings.
both parents need to pay attention to be role models for their children. and there must be a family background that shows children the importance of being aware of their faith.
best,
Dushwari
Dushwari, kids follow by example more than by rules. I know families where the mom has not read namaaz for ages. Her 16 year old daughter has no clue. What we forget is that we are not just answerable for ourselves but for our children as well.
Re: Young Pakistanis and religious, family values (split)
^mashAllah, Tariq bhai, that is what is necessary.
and look at that, an infant knows that what to immitate and observe.
same with bad programming on indian and pakistani channels, that when are watched at homes, of course, children will think dancing and being violent is alright.
i wish that it can be controlled and we never support any indecent programming so that children are safe from that all.
Re: Young Pakistanis and religious, family values (split)
^mashAllah, Tariq bhai, that is what is necessary.
and look at that, an infant knows that what to immitate and observe.
same with bad programming on indian and pakistani channels, that when are watched at homes, of course, children will think dancing and being violent is alright.
i wish that it can be controlled and we never support any indecent programming so that children are safe from that all.
I agree totally about the Indo-Pak channels. If things are not kept in balance, it is very easy to get influenced. We as parents need to set standards.
Re: Young Pakistanis and religious, family values (split)
Niksik and TLK,
i absolutely agree. people often say to me, you are not a Mom, but you know this or that and i simply say, a) my education and brought up has made me aware of these things and i dont have to be a Mom to be responsible.
true that after being a Mom, one must be even more careful about what kids learn.
we are all indeed responsible for all the kids and what we expose them to or allow bad elements to tempt them.
so we should encourage and educate children about WHY being a faithful believer is necessary.
Dushwari, kids follow by example more than by rules. I know families where the mom has not read namaaz for ages. Her 16 year old daughter has no clue. What we forget is that we are not just answerable for ourselves but for our children as well.
Re: Young Pakistanis and religious, family values (split)
Questions :
In your family and friends circle roughly what percentage of young boys and girls do not offer prayers regularly ? ( please mention % in pakistan/india and outside subcontinent separetly , if possible )
5%
In your family and friends circle roughly what percentage of young boys and girls use bad language (swearing) in home and within family ?
0%
In your family and friends circle roughly what percentage of young boys and girls are not chaste ? ( cross limits in relationship or otherwise )
0%
In your family and friends circle roughly what percentage of young boys and girls drink liquor (ocasionally ) ?
0% Some adults do drink.
What is the percentage of divorce in your family and friend’s cirlcle ?
Minimum possible percentage.
What percentage of people in your family and friends (you know somehow) are involved in extra marital affairs ?
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Re: Young Pakistanis and religious, family values (split)
The things is Dushwari, if we instill love of religious value rather than fear, there are more chances of attraction. Alhamdulillah, my older daughter looks forward to her Quran classes and revisions, she loves to participate in namaaz and sits quietly through mine or her dad's quran recitation. She always says Allah mia will love me if I do this or do that...I hope and pray this attitude continues.
Re: Young Pakistanis and religious, family values (split)
inshaAllah.
this will be so good to know as a guide. i totally know that kids pretty much absorb what we do.
and hope is that we also stay on the right track.
amen.
I don’t know many ppl who intenitionally don’t offer it, as in they don’t believe ni offering it. But i know many more who do try to offer it as much as possible but get lazy. I know very few who are actually regular with it. So I’d say its’ 10-60-30.
punjabis mein.. 100 … in my in laws… 0 %
the friends i have, are all pretty decent. to my knowledge, they dont’ have boyfriends or girlfriends, and are getting physical. so i guess it’d be a small percentage, like 10% who are not chaste…
0 %
Er 30 %…but they are all of the older generation, friends parents, relatives etc. don’t know anyone of my generation.
Re: Young Pakistanis and religious, family values (split)
Very interesting answers :k:
Ok first i should answer these questions myself
In your family and friends circle roughly what percentage of young boys and girls do not offer prayers regularly ? ( please mention % in pakistan/india and outside subcontinent separetly , if possible )
Roughly 70% do not bother much about daily prayers ( for jumma, 70~80% do go for jumma prayers)
In your family and friends circle roughly what percentage of young boys and girls use bad language (swearing) in home and within family ?
5~10% . But generally punjabi people are notorious for it. It wont surprise me if someone says 50~60%
In your family and friends circle roughly what percentage of young boys and girls are not chaste ? ( cross limits in relationship or otherwise )
Less than 10%. I agree our society is quite conservative here in pakistani middle class population. But more important aspect is scarcity of opportunity. You cant realy lose virginity easily , unless you are quite be-gherat (loose character)
In your family and friends circle roughly what percentage of young boys and girls drink liquor (ocasionally ) ?
Less than 10%
It is expensive
not easily available
it is not really offered at most parites to young people
Some older richer people do sharab noshi quite frequently
What is the percentage of divorce in your family and frie
nd’s cirlcle ?
Again it is very very low. On paper it looks good but there are some couple i know who are totally incompatible. But family pressures does not allow them to partaway
6. What percentage of people in your family and friends (you know somehow) are involved in extra marital affairs ?
Same as divorce.
Alhumdulillah, I guess I’m in good company for the most part.
Just wanted to mention that while it’s true that good examples have to be set for children, I have personally seen many families where the children are more religious than the parents. For example, a friend of mine started wearing hijab and her rather liberal family used to chide her for it.. but she persevered, and now even her mother has started reading namaz again. I have seen other individuals who were far from religion in their school days and are now more attuned to their religion. In my friends circle namaz times are adhered to, young people attend lectures and social events at the masjid, and while we don’t specifically sit down and talk Islam, there is sharing of knowledge and impromptu discussions in our interactions. So personally, I’m optimistic abt the situation.
… in my in laws… 0 %