Be does this to you because he knows he can't do anything about it. If can't leave him then either accept it or show him you can live without by building yourself up. Part of him doesn't respect you. focus your energies elsewhere like taking care of the kids and a build a life outside of him. When he sees that you are not a doormat then maybe just maybe he might get his act Togehter. the other possibility is that he has learned that cheating is okay and it is allowed. The consequences are to great enough for him to change.
my phone is never password locked. It's never in my pocket when I am at home. It's at the kitchen counter, or dining table, or charging by my bedside. My wife insisted that she does not need to know, but I told her my Gmail, Facebook and GS passwords. She is not checking my phone or emails, but I don't want her to think even for a second that I am trying to hide anything from her.
Re: You should check on your husbands call records
Since we have gotten married..not even once..my wife have picked up her phone and vice verca. We don't care..there is good amount of trust between us..
Re: You should check on your husbands call records
miyaaN biwii ke beech agar trust uTh gayaa to phir bachaa hii kia? isse bahtar hai k Khush asloob tareeqe se fareeqai'n apnii apnii samt alag alag muta'aiyan kar leN aur talaaq/Khulaa kaa jaa'iz tareeqa apnaayeN...
...magar, trust uThne se pahle tamaam tar koshisheN Haqeeqat jaanne ke liye karnii chaahiyeN...mediation/reconciliation efforts laazim o malzoom hai kisii bhii talaaq/Khulaa se pahle.
Re: You should check on your husbands call records
I want to know what kind of evidence OP is waiting for? I'm pretty sure you have everything in front of you and your hubby is actually not even making an effort anymore to hide it. How can something be going on for 2 years right under your nose without you noticing it? Seems like a case of neglect on both parties. Maybe seperate ways are in time now.
Re: You should check on your husbands call records
It seems empathy is getting lesser and lesser in the world these days. When a person's trust gets shattered , they are prone to react the same manner as the OP.
OP, you really need to sit back and think the next course of action. The key is communication. Communicate with him as much as you can , try to see if this is a relationship breaker or can this be put behind and forgiven. In times like these , there is no point further corning the spouse. It would be best if you try to ask him where and what he think went wrong that he didnt feel like sharing his thoughts with you but another person.
This is the first step and will determine what course your relationship will take from here on wards.
Re: You should check on your husbands call records
We are trying to build our relationship but it's me I don't trust him anymore even though he has stopped the calls and he lets me go through his phone he even leaves his phone behind.
He took advantage of my trust for 2 years I had no clue at all that's why I want other wives to check their spouses phone once in a while you never know what you can find and god forbid if they do they can stop it like I did I showed him the door he begged for forgiveness then elders got involved I had to think about the children again as he is good with them and he is trying his best with me.
We don't bring the subject up as it will only make it worse.
I keep it to my self I always think about it keeps going round in my head that how come I didn't have a clue and if only I checked his bills earlier.
Re: You should check on your husbands call records
Shareen, totally understandable. The turmoil you are going through is not unjustified. A broken trust can take forever to heal. So I for one, wouldnt say even for a minute to forget what happened.
However, please think of it like this : If you have decided to take him back , then sit alone one day and ask yourself to either forgive him completely or not forgive him at all. Dont keep yourself hanging in between. If you decide to forgive him, for various reason like, there is shaitaan always trying to ruin relationships , we are humans and can err etc , then please do so wholeheatedly not for him but for your own sake. Shaitan will keep on reminding you of all that happened , but dont let the thoughts ruin you.
I can sense from your post he is making an effort. Its a good sign. I think you should give him another chance but you can keep a vigilant eye on him until you feel you can trust him again.
Perhaps you can focus your energy on looking at his attitude , he's trying to make it up to you and that should slowly build back your confidence in him.
Also try to strengthen your communication with each other. It wasnt your fault what happened, but finding out what made him do what he did , its important to get him to open up. If it hurts too much , its ok dont discuss what happened let that be buried in the past , that is the best strategy.
All the best , hope your inner strength guides you through this .
Re: You should check on your husbands call records
Shareen, totally understandable. The turmoil you are going through is not unjustified. A broken trust can take forever to heal. So I for one, wouldnt say even for a minute to forget what happened.
However, please think of it like this : If you have decided to take him back , then sit alone one day and ask yourself to either forgive him completely or not forgive him at all. Dont keep yourself hanging in between. If you decide to forgive him, for various reason like, there is shaitaan always trying to ruin relationships , we are humans and can err etc , then please do so wholeheatedly not for him but for your own sake. Shaitan will keep on reminding you of all that happened , but dont let the thoughts ruin you.
I can sense from your post he is making an effort. Its a good sign. I think you should give him another chance but you can keep a vigilant eye on him until you feel you can trust him again.
Perhaps you can focus your energy on looking at his attitude , he's trying to make it up to you and that should slowly build back your confidence in him.
Also try to strengthen your communication with each other. It wasnt your fault what happened, but finding out what made him do what he did , its important to get him to open up. If it hurts too much , its ok dont discuss what happened let that be buried in the past , that is the best strategy.
All the best , hope your inner strength guides you through this .
Ever wonder what if our husbands check on our calls and record our conversations to find out our longest calls are to our moms and sisters chughli-fying our mils, sils and husbands? phir kya hoga bachooo jeee ???
I made my husband’s gmail and facebook accounts and he asks me for his passwords when his froends tell him they emailed him something important All he ever hides and deletes from his phone are texts and call logs from his mom and sisters to avoid getting taanay from moi keh kabhi mujse bhi itni lambi baat kar liya karayn
Re: You should check on your husbands call records
OP, As i have followed your other threads i can see the turmoil you have gone thorough when you found out about your husband chatting to another girl which in my opinion too doesn't come under "a harmless chat among friends". but i would disagree with the advice you are giving to all wives that they should check the call logs of their husbands. there are many husbands who are genuine and true to their wives and to their marriages that they are not involved in cheating etc. also there are men who don't appreciate their wives or their moms or sisters ( before marriage) to check upon or even touch their phones not because they are involved in something bad or are hiding something but only because they view their phones and conversations too personal to be shared or viewed by family members. so if someone has a husband like tihs and if she starts checking his phone records it will be a recipe for disaster in my view.
Re: You should check on your husbands call records
my phone is never password locked. It's never in my pocket when I am at home. It's at the kitchen counter, or dining table, or charging by my bedside. My wife insisted that she does not need to know, but I told her my Gmail, Facebook and GS passwords. She is not checking my phone or emails, but I don't want her to think even for a second that I am trying to hide anything from her.
ok so have you told your mrs. about your multiple fb/email accounts PW as well? And perhaps about the other prepaid phone that's you keep in your workplace drawer?:D
phir kya hoga bachooo jeee ???
All he ever hides and deletes from his phone are texts and call logs from his mom and sisters 
to avoid getting taanay from moi keh kabhi mujse bhi itni lambi baat kar liya karayn 
