Hareem I think the reason that your husband doesnt get upset is that he sees a vibrant, healthy and active woman. One that surely will live to grow very old with him by your side. Its just so very unimaginable to him that those discussions, while he may take them seriously, he just truly cannot imagine ever having to face it.
When my dad was diagnosed with very advanced cancer, I STILL thought he could beat it. He was such an invincible man - a superhero - to me. A few years on, after his passing, I still find myself shocked at times that he is no longer with us.
Awwww mamaof3....very sorry to hear about your father. May his soul rest in peace.
ok a few more thoughts from my personal point of view...
If I should pass on, my husband would likely not be lonely because he has his 3 kids that he loves very much. He also loves me very much.
My husband and my boys will never find a replacement in their hearts for Mama, that I know for sure. Yet...to have a nice woman who will make them nice food, have family dinners, make sure that homework gets done and that laundry, food shopping and household things are done, that the boys get extra attention and hugs when they need them...so that my husband can keep working and earning like he does. Those things are important for me, I would want to be sure that they have these things.
I imagine life without a remarriage. And its a sad thing. Dad would surely take care of it all. BUT...it would be very sad for him, not having anyone to help him with the boys. Not having any adult to share his day and his dinner with. Sad for my boys not to have a woman's touch in their lives. When my boys are hurt, they want mama. If mama is not around ie., if something upsetting happens at school, then they go right to the nicest female available.
"Mama" is not replaceable. But another woman can give them some of the caring that they will need.
But what if that step-mother turns out to be very evil? This is what I'm afraid of.....step-parents being evil.