Speaking of sets, since there were many weddings in the family during my recent trip, I got a chance to observe “women and their sets” phenomenon more closely.
Women are so weird when it comes to their zaiwar. It’s some kind of kink or convolusion. For example, one of my cousins wanted me to get married only 'cause she wanted to buy the jewlery and there was no immediate candidate available for whom she could shop around. Her claim was that she is not interested to buy the jewlery for herself (a very rare impulse on women’s part) but was only interested to buy the jewlery. unn ka chehra jewlery shopping kay naam par damak uthata tha and she’d immediately descend into some kinda fantasy world and won’t be available to converse for next few hours.
Aik aur mohtarma, who was involved in a pretty big phadda with another khatoon-ay family (so big that unn say milna julna, akathay khana peena was religiously haram) calls the same auntie up an hour before one of the mehndis and asks her to bring one of her sets so that she could wear it. I was flabbergasted. I was told that borrowing sets is not haram. akathay khana peena ya bolna chalna is.
An auntie brought up her gold set she received in jahaiz during dark ages. The thing was motha*&%%%& big and ugly. She sat down among a circle of half dozen other women of the family (I was sleeping there and got woke up by the rudeness) and they all discussed the future architecture of the set. They wanted to break it up and make something out of it more contemprary. The end result of that four hour brain storming was that the contemprary design the auntie had her heart set on was uglier than the existing one. In the history of that set it was decided for the fifteenth time that she should leave it alone and continue not wearing it!
Yeah I dont know what this obsession is - blind materialism. I find it on our side of the family too with some members. Some of them just treat the old jewelry kind of like a family heirloom. But some of them are just bonkers over it - planning on how they're going to cut it up and divide it.
Some of these ladies do go overboard with it. sighz You should have taken the Aunties to a bowling alley or a library or a college or something to show them that there is more in life than zevar.
they are not haram its just better to marry out of the family so that “different nations may come to know one another” (al-quran) dont know the exact ayah/surah..il try and get it!
Islam has nothing against family marriages…
culturally, most muslims tend to marry within the same family…
for a better understanding, and not to have any sort of inferiority/superiority complex later on in the marriage regarding family status, Islam enoucrages to wd in the same family with a similar social status…
silly logo, I’ve no idea how this turned into cousin marriages. I think you guys misunderstood. My cousin is happily married with a cute kid whom I’m very fond of (although I’m sorta weary of his drools over my shirt). She meant to get married to anyone just so that she could shop around for jewelry for me.
haha! Reminds of the presents I got on my nikah most of consisted of jewelry of some type or another and a few relatives were staring, touching, weighing the necklaces bracelets etc. so they could comment on them. It was EXTREMELY weird watching them.
its like these days u cant be married if u dotn have a ring
