If you dealing with intrusive in-laws. Where each and every member of their family (including male members) thinks it to be their duty to interfere in your matters and they don’t want you to tell the situation to your parents. Initially you kept from telling this to your parents but things are getting worse day by day. What would you do?
Re: Would you tell your parents?
depends if you have compromised with the situation you need not to tell them BUT if you are seeking support and solution then you can share it !
However , I don't think they would be able to help you much the only person who can have a solution to this problem is your husband and he needs to realise and accept the problem you are facing. Try communicating this with him in a polite way and let him know what are you feeling.
Re: Would you tell your parents?
My parents are my best friends..
My mom and dad told me bfore rukhsati not to hide nythin (e.a. Probs etc in susraal) they never ever interfered, but adviced and guided me so that i can solve the "issues"....
I personally didn't told them everythin (so tht they wouldnt get upset) but in case of things goin out of hand... I know my parents will b there for me ....even if it is just for moral support.
Re: Would you tell your parents?
Never hide anything from Ma n Pa!
Of course they will be upset and worried but they will be more worried once they find out ur pain later on.
Always talk...x
Re: Would you tell your parents?
tell them. i didnt initially, but it was obvius in my voice that i wasnt happy. my issue was i was living in pak and i didnt want to, wanted to go back and mil is a nightmare, it helped me alot telling my mum in the end.
Re: Would you tell your parents?
Yeah tell your mom kyu k mom b kabhi baho thi ..:D
Re: Would you tell your parents?
Do tell them, but dont tell them in such a manner that they get a shock, reveal little by little in the start, like telling them someone else story, so they get mentally prepare. Parents are kind of sensitive when it comes on knowing their daughter is not happy and she was hiding all her suffering and this much has happened and they were unaware of all this. So please be careful, but do tell them
Re: Would you tell your parents?
personally , if i were in that sitaution , i would have never told my parents anything , but if things were so bad , yes i would have informed my other family members , brothers or sisters,
Re: Would you tell your parents?
kintny masly massail hoty hain shadi k baad... uff
Re: Would you tell your parents?
I would not share with my parents it would stress them out. And I just learned I can handle myself being stressed but not my elders...tugs my heart.
Re: Would you tell your parents?
Thanks everyone for replying.
I didn't tell my parents any detail but parents can easy judge when their kids are upset. They are very friendly alhummdulillah. Now i have decided to tell them some details. I won't be emotional (will try to not to be teary at all)
Re: Would you tell your parents?
Thanks everyone for replying. I didn't tell my parents any detail but parents can easy judge when their kids are upset. They are very friendly alhummdulillah. Now i have decided to tell them some details. I won't be emotional (will try to not to be teary at all)
Wish u good luck
Re: Would you tell your parents?
Thank you sweetequation :-)
Another question from you people.
What is the best way to keep your husband updated about whatever is happening in the house without making him feel that you are being a nonstop ranter?
Re: Would you tell your parents?
^ i generally wait for the right time and place.and i dont rant two days in a row. or even two weeks in a row. I wait things out, and make sure to say all that annoys me at an appropriate time in a nice way. which looks like im just informing him so that there are no surprises.
Re: Would you tell your parents?
^ Thanks for replying.
! I am also trying this for a few days and I would just say it works great! Thanks for advice Demesne :-)
Re: Would you tell your parents?
^ just make sure not to rant consecutive days in a row. at max once a week "informing" him of things is enough. And that too when you two are sitting around, he is in a good mood, and to speak in an offhand/by-the-way manner.
Ive noticed that even if I did it in an offhand manner but it was two days in a row, no matter how small the issue was both days, and even though the issue didn't involve family but rather the hired help, husband gets annoyed. it is best to bide your time and when you DO talk, make sure to talk everything out in a measured manner.
Re: Would you tell your parents?
I totally agree!!!
Never hide anything from Ma n Pa!
Of course they will be upset and worried but they will be more worried once they find out ur pain later on. Always talk...x
Would you tell your parents?
If there is abuse if any kind, you need to tell your parents!! If its little things that with time u might not care about or will somehow fade away then do not get your parents involved. The picture you paint now will last forever and later on even if the things are good and adjusted between you and your parents, they might not be over their initial impression of your inlaws. Perhaps talk to hubs and have him nip it in the bud and if that doesn't work then perhaps talking to your sister wagera or friend might help. Parents overworry!!!
Re: Would you tell your parents?
Depends on the magnitude of issues we're dealing with here.
But to be absolutely honest with you, instead of having my jimmies in a rustle (complain) to my parents, I'd want to find the courage and confidence to deal with them head on, and on my own. I mean, I'm sure you're off the stage where you could be considered as vulnerable or be dependent on your parents to fix your troubles for you. Most parents in this day and age, seek to raise/invest in their daughter with all their might and hence, somewhere inside their heart they expect their brave daughter to come through just as they'd expect their son to.
Long gone need to be the days when a woman needs anyone's (More so the parents) support to help get her out of trouble. But even then, I'd rather go seek help of a brother who could be considered as a father figure than to cause the parents the grief they just don't truly deserve.