Would you go?

[Paheli00]

@Chameli420

And why is is suddenly so important with Pakistani culture now? that I behave like a traditional bhabhi and perform all the Pakistani wedding things for her?

I am not sure if I am making my point clear but my reason for reacting like this is primarily that I see double standards here. And I am also worried for her future cuz she hasnt learnt from her past 2 hasty marriages that this isnt the way to go…

1. In my humble opinion, you’re missing the point. IF you go and perform “traditional bhabhi” duties, you are not doing them for HER. You are doing it for your husband. Whether or not your husband cares, the fact of the matter is that his family (SIL, his parents, other relatives, “aunties” etc) will take notice of your absense and WILL make negative comments. Those negative comments will get back your husband one way or another. I’m assuming that your husband will not be happy knowing that others are talking about you in a negative way. Your absence gives your in-laws “ammunition” against you. So you performing your “bhabhi duties” is not for your SIL…its for your husband so that he does not have to hear others talk sh*t about you.

2. Your SIL is an adult woman right? You two obviously aren’t good friends. Don’t worry about her future. If she wants to get married 10x and divorce 10 husbands…well then let her. The one and only person you need to think about in this situation is your husband.

You mentioned on a post that you have no discussed this with your husband. That’s the very first thing you need to do before anything else…ask him if he’s going to the wedding and how he would feel if you choose not to go.