Re: Working Womens Kids More Likely to be Sick or Poisoned
I work and InshAllah intend to work even when i'm married. I can't stay at home and do nothing as that would completely depress me. I would hate to rely on my husband for everything.
Re: Working Womens Kids More Likely to be Sick or Poisoned
I think its obvious women have a right to work and do what they please. Men - begrudgingly - acknowledge that right most of the time. However, when studies like this one come out, they dont really read them (the first page of it had me laughing)...they just get on a high horse and yell to the mountain tops "see i told you our kids would turn out crazy because you wanted to work!".
The issue is not working mothers at all. The issue is the amount of help working mothers ask for from their husbands while raising a child. Men THINK they wouldnt have to do anything if the women were at home. Wrong. You're still going to be stuck helping out so you might as well keep your wife happy.
This really peeves me, Reha. Why isn't it obvious also that men have a right to not work and do what they please? Why the double standards?
I never said they dont.
What peeves me is when a woman does what she wants and there are 100 people to say "you can do what you want but look what happens when you do". Its not fair, is it?
Re: Working Womens Kids More Likely to be Sick or Poisoned
I never said they dont.
What peeves me is when a woman does what she wants and there are 100 people to say "you can do what you want but look what happens when you do". Its not fair, is it?
Even successful working women today have admitted that women CAN'T have it all. It's extremely hard to have a demanding career and raise your kids. If you do, then you will sacrifice one or the other. There's no way around that.
A woman can do what she wants, but to say that her kids would not be better off if she spent more time with them is incorrect. Same goes for fathers. Men or women, both sacrifice their careers a bit when they have kids. If both parents work, then there's a bigger chance of kids being neglected. If one parent stays home, then the other is able to dedicate more time to their career. And I'm speaking more towards younger children. Past a certain age, I think children can take care of themselves to an extent (feeding etc) so less time is needed but parents should still spend time with their kids.
But sadly, the cost of living has increased such that many families are not able to make ends meet without both parents working.
Re: Working Womens Kids More Likely to be Sick or Poisoned
Even successful working women today have admitted that women CAN'T have it all. It's extremely hard to have a demanding career and raise your kids. If you do, then you will sacrifice one or the other. There's no way around that.
A woman can do what she wants, but to say that her kids would not be better off if she spent more time with them is incorrect. Same goes for fathers. Men or women, both sacrifice their careers a bit when they have kids. If both parents work, then there's a bigger chance of kids being neglected. If one parent stays home, then the other is able to dedicate more time to their career. And I'm speaking more towards younger children. Past a certain age, I think children can take care of themselves to an extent (feeding etc) so less time is needed but parents should still spend time with their kids.
But sadly, the cost of living has increased such that many families are not able to make ends meet without both parents working.
You're contradicting yourself. On one hand, you're making it seem as if women are neglecting their children when they work. On the other, you're saying single income households are becoming rare.
So, she loses either way doesnt she? If she works, she is a bad mother. If she doesnt, she is bad wife.
Re: Working Womens Kids More Likely to be Sick or Poisoned
I said "demanding" as in the type of careers which require people to regularly work 9-10 hour days. In this case, she would be spending less time with her family. It can still work, as people have mentioned, but it's tough. And I mentioned men as well, they too "neglect" their kids if they dedicate all their time to their careers.
I never said she's a bad wife if she doesn't work. I mentioned the economic factor to defend women who work, because it's necessary. They should not be judged harshly for helping their families.
Re: Working Womens Kids More Likely to be Sick or Poisoned
I understand what you are saying, but do consider that having a working mom can add a lot tothe family. There is a sense of pride in her work ethic and accomplishments, she is a role model as a nurturer and also at other skills, she is capable and reliable in a variety of ways. It's not all about everyone giving the same amount of time.
Also, what do you tell your daughters,when you raise em. Hat are you teacing them to be? What dress are you creating for them? What is te point of themhaving a nurturing mom that cultivates their talents, if those talents are not allowed to be used?
Depends on the person who is in the seat to judge. Some might think her abilities as a mother, raising up a child, giving up a career is worthy of more respect. On the other hand, some might think shes worthy of more respect because she sacrificed her time with her children to work and provide for their betterment. I would personally go for the former, because I certainly think taking care of your house, children and all is no easy job at all.
Re: Working Womens Kids More Likely to be Sick or Poisoned
^No one thinks sacrificing time with the child makes you more worthy of respect. What I'm saying is that the children gain another person to look up to, who has established a different path, accomplished perhaps great things, pursued a passion they themselves may share, etc. That can be a powerful example for them.
Re: Working Womens Kids More Likely to be Sick or Poisoned
Wow. Really?
You need to PubMed an excuse to push women back into the home?
Sad.
Re: Working Womens Kids More Likely to be Sick or Poisoned
What peeves me is when a woman does what she wants and there are 100 people to say "you can do what you want but look what happens when you do". Its not fair, is it?
Ok.
But I should add that no, men are not free to do what they want and please.
Women won't even consider men marriage material, if men come forward with a proposal that they are not going to work after shadi.
There is little to none escaping this fact that men have to be the breadwinners for the family. That's a default policy line that everyone adheres to. It must change.
Re: Working Womens Kids More Likely to be Sick or Poisoned
Ok.
But I should add that no, men are not free to do what they want and please.
Women won't even consider men marriage material, if men come forward with a proposal that they are not going to work after shadi.
There is little to none escaping this fact that men have to be the breadwinners for the family. That's a default policy line that everyone adheres to. It must change.
That's a very good point. Men are expected to do plenty of things as well and, for the most part, do it without complaining. Not every man is out there "living his dream". Many have given up on theirs to work to support their families.
Re: Working Womens Kids More Likely to be Sick or Poisoned
[quote]
What I'm saying is that the children gain another person to look up to, who has established a different path, accomplished perhaps great things, pursued a passion they themselves may share, etc. That can be a powerful example for them.
[/QUOTE]
Yes, they certainly will be for other people, more so at adolescent ages though, not infancy and even teens. But overall, yes.