My wife is on a new diet. Coconuts and bananas.
She hasn’t lost weight, but boy can she climb a tree!
She was at the beauty shop for two hours.
That was only for the estimate.
She got a mud pack and looked great for two days.
Then the mud fell off.
We always hold hands.
If I let go, she shops.
My wife has a black belt in shopping.
My wife will buy anything marked down.
Last year she bought an escalator.
All my wife does is shop.
Once she was sick for a week, and three stores went under.
When I married my wife, she told me I was one in a million.
Only after learning of her past did I realize what she meant.
Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are beautiful.
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The last fight we had was my fault. My wife asked, “What’s on the TV?” I said, “Dust!”
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In the beginning God created earth and rested. Then God created man and rested. Then God created woman. Since then neither God nor man has rested.
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My wife and I are inseparable. In fact, last week it took four state troopers and a dog.
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Do you know the punishment for bigamy? Two mother-in-laws.
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Young son: Is it true, Dad, I heard that in some parts of Africa a man doesn’t know his wife until he marries her?
Dad: That happens in every country, son. -
The most effective way to remember your wife’s birthday is to forget it once.
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How do most men define marriage? An expensive way to get laundry done for free.
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If you want your wife to listen and pay undivided attention to every word you say, talk in your sleep.
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Then there was a man who said, “I never knew what real happiness was until I got married; then it was too late.”
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Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they look beautiful.
LOL! Oh Waqas 1 conchita NILL
(implied to the initiator of this thread)