So, lastinght I attended my first ever local government professional women’s dinner… I was quite thrilled to have been invited to an invent which my fellow peers were attending..
apart from the lavish location and yummy dinner, I found the whole night rather.. lets say.. unmotivating..
basically, what i learnt from the women CEOs of our era is that, its a struggle to be a woman and be a working professional. We women have to do double what men do to get to a position of recognition..
and to be honest to you all, I dont think I ever felt like that prior to lastnight. I’ve always felt like an equal, if not more capable than my fellow male peer.. and ive never ever felt that i have to sacrifice my family for my career… which is the message some CEOS indirectly were giving/saying… that if we wanna get somewhere, we need to sacrifice… I totally understand that.. give a little to get a little…
BUT, really.. i was highly unthrilled by the message.. or unmotivating session..
what are your thoughts on this? do u think u as a woman have to give up a lot more to be where u r.. and go where u want to? or do u think its a choice u make??
sadzz, I agree with you completely. The women who bit*h about not being treated as an equal in the work place are the women who you find constantly talking about shopping, make up, clothes, backbiting, gossiping. Well, if you're going to play the "i'm just a girl" or "i'm such a girly girl" role, then you know what, no one is going to take you seriously.
The men in my department don't go around talking about sports and cars and tools, they come in, do their work and get out.
Here's the latest thing that's really been pis*ing me off lately, two women in my department knit during meetings, WTF, can I bring my Nintendo DS and play THAT during meetings, it's effing rude you stupid b*tches, don't knit in meetings.
I'm not in a position to comment i suppose, but the way things sound... it does sound very discouraging and depressing.. more so when u read the threads on here and how people think of career/stay at home women.
Often you see women saying that they will stay home while the kid is young and then go back to work, and get something part time or something..I was reading this novel and three women were having this conversation about working and raising kids and one of htem pointed out that you'd really want to stay home when the kids are older and in HS so u can be there to guide them and to have the flexibility at that time, u need to have that seniority..which isn't very likely if one is just at home for first few years. Ok ok it was a fictional novel but she had a good point......
I think what it ultimately comes down to... is ur spouse. If htey are understanding of whatever u wnat to do then nothing is difficult or impossible.
only because women are the ones to give birth to and raise children (possibly). but otherwise men have to give up a lot too. i'm sure everyone knows men who have sacrificed family life/time to get where they are. obviously all the other factors come into it too - men can work and build a career and then settle down to have a family, whereas women have to have a family by a certain age if they desire one. so yes, if women want to do what nature has allowed them to do and have a career, something will have to give and yes, it's a choice that they have to make.
just as an example, my friend works in an investment bank, he gets in at 7am and leaves between 7-8pm, he complains that he has no life. but his boss is a woman and leaves at 2am and is back in the office at 7am. you'd think she's probably giving up her whole life right, working harder than the men to get where she is? but there is another senior guy in their japan office that doesn't even go 'home' - he just naps in the office at night!
it's all relative. plenty of men make the choice between career and family too.
I think it's hard to balance work and home, but I certainly don't see much of the struggle in the work place alone. Maybe it's the fact that I'm in education and it isn't as biased against women as some other fields. But pretty much from the first day I've worked, my colleagues have given me a great deal of respect, trust, and responsibility. Perhaps the one thing is that in some cases it's the men that get first picked as administrators, but it's not been a consistent thing where I am.
I think it's hard to balance work and home, but I certainly don't see much of the struggle in the work place alone. Maybe it's the fact that I'm in education and it isn't as biased against women as some other fields. But pretty much from the first day I've worked, my colleagues have given me a great deal of respect, trust, and responsibility. Perhaps the one thing is that in some cases it's the men that get first picked as administrators, but it's not been a consistent thing where I am.
i work in a male dominated environment. i could never say that i haven't been treated equally or had the same opportunities. but if i want to achieve as much as my colleagues i have to be prepared to put in the time, which i don't because my family life is important to me.
aahmed.. i didnt buy any of the stuff these women were talking about. Matter of fact.. it all felt like lies. One was proud she had raised three children and was a grandma.. and then had the nerve to tell the audience that she knows female CEOs who dont see their families from monday to friday just so they can come to work… (thats if they live a fair distance from home)..
and i thought to myself… is that what people have to do these days to achieve somtehing in life?? i personally think thats a choice u make to get to ur achievement… Im not at a managerial level or anything… but i consider my little achievements to be a huge success.. and i dont think i would ever sacrifice my family for that.. and thats the choice ive made. To balance my life in a way in which i get best of both worlds (to some degree)..
i personally just dislike nags… people who whinge all the time. Yes, i have faced a bit of a hurdle at my new position as they dont give credit to people who are not managers (so the oldies dont give u respect even if ur on a higer post than them :halo: )
but khair… ive never had a male tell me im not an equal.. as much as the women CEOs did lastnight… how sad is that?
stoppit, and i totally agree with u. Men, just like women, sacrifice a lot....
i dunno, maybe its just government then.. where women find it a struggle.... but if they do, why not do something about it? idiots...
well they can only do so much (the government). women find it more difficult, i guess, because most of them want quality family time and to be able bring up the kids etc. men are generally okay with only spending time with the family on weekends etc as they know that they are doing an important job too - providing for the family.
the government is aiming for equality in different aspects though. they can't help out women without making it unfair for men. so in the UK at least men can have paternity leave etc instead.
sadzz at these conferences you usually meet "feminists" not the women leaders who balanced their work and family just as well.. I won;t be surprised if you tell me that they had tables set up for Mary Kate Cosmetics and that the whole look was pink or purple!!
I work in a field that is predominantly males but I have never felt being challenged or looked down upon.. Since I work for the county govt, what I have observed is, I get those racist looks when I go for inspections in small towns and cities because of my ethnicity but definitely not the gender!!
Ive never been looked down upon by a male peer... (yes by females but for other reasons) and its only now when im in govt, i get older women treating me like a "girl".. someone who doesnt have the experience they have..
I believe it would be unfair to say that women aren't treat equally because it's not true. In my opinion, women are treated equally these days, and even have higher chances of getting a job than men.
And yes I do believe that you have to sacrifice a bit more than men because If you are a career-woman then you've got more responsibilities. Whereas men's job is to concentrate on their career but we have so much going on especially if married. For example: taking care of the house, (ghar chalana), children, family and there are many other things that require our attention within the family. So it's hard when you're working becaue you dont want to neglect anything I mentioned above.
a man has to worry about his career, a women has to worry about her career/her husband/he kids/her house/her family etc etc etc
ofcourse its harder. men will never understand, and think its just women moaning and B*tching about nothing....
Please stop telling us fairytales, ok!?
Men has to worry also about his wife, kids, family etc. etc. etc.
Aren't you moaning right now? For both it's hard. I think Men with families
go to work for their families, not to f'ck some secretaries in the office...
Women will never stop bit'chin' and yet they dare to "fight" against Men.
Is it not ok if only one has a carreer? Why do we "kill" each other? Is it a fight Men vs. Women?
So what if Men has a career and Women not? or the other side around? For what does a Woman
need to make $100,000 in a month? I know why, women tend to boast around when they are with
their so called girly friends, a men would go out and buy a Ferrari and then boast around...
but now seriously, why is there a competition between Men and Women? Why? Who earns more, who makes more, who carries the most responsibilities? What the hell are you?
sadzz, what was your public contribution to that alleged unmotivation? perhaps, it was all the more reason for you, to share your observation with your colleagues, and if you could, then you should have presented a good plan to modify the vibe that the seminar gave you. what field of work these CEOs attendees are in?
I don't understand the need to "have what he has".
Are we aiming for equality or identicalness? Because the two are certainly not the same.
I don't understand what is so wrong with allot of these so called females. i know this is abit off track but, saying "actress" instead of "actor" and "editrix" instead of "editor" - is it really that degrading, ladies? Does it somehow undermine your efforts?
I don't understand why the feminist movement is working against itself - instead of embracing feminism in its whole, changing the English language under the guise of rights, equality, and sexism.
I want equality. Nothing more, nothing less.
A kilo of apples and a kilo of oranges are equal. But are they the same? Must they be the same fruit to weigh the same amount? No.
Through identicalness, you lose your identity - which includes your gender because that, scientifically speaking, determines your actions, etc.