The notion that with responsibility comes maturity is very prevalent in my family. As a byproduct of this notion comes the practice of marrying off the children at an early age. In other words, it is believed that the responsibility of marriage will nurture the maturity required to handle such responsibilities. From generations this idea is in practice and for the most part has been pretty successful.
With the rapid change in societal norms as well as economic living standards & change in professions, this line of thought has become a challenge to uphold. Girls are completing graduate studies, boys are having a hard time trying to live up to their wishful standards of living with being the only bread winner and we are no more the farmers living in remote areas of Punjab earning our living off the land we cultivate.
My cousins living in Pakistan are having a hard time convincing the elders about the changing norms and the elders are probably having a hard time letting go of their old ideals. Is anyone else or their family having similar issues?
Secondly, I believe in context of marriage the notion of “with responsibility comes maturity” was true for joint family system. Where the couple had a good base support from a group of family members, be it financially, socially & emotionally. With joint family system almost to its end in our family, its hard to keep up with old practices. As my father’s generation urbanized their living in Pakistan and my generation globalized that approach, its a challenge to live up to the expectations of our Dadi Jaan who still hopes, one day all her six sons will come back to the Hawali in our pind for good & be farmers again.