My father and his colleague (our next door neighbor, I would call him uncle in this post) were supposed to be in the same plane that killed few of the other colleagues of my father, who used to live in our neighborhood.
We all were grieved at the loss of others but thankful to Allah (s.w.t) that the heads of two families were saved.
Our next door auntie and her children (a son and a daughter) were very happy that uncle wasn’t in that plane. BUT they didn’t know the worst part of their life might be waiting for them. Being at a high post, the uncle used to visit different countries for official visits. He was seen by many people with a young beautiful women in a 5 star hotel. when this rumor reached the family, they didn’t believe it, till uncle started behaving suspiciously. After the family confirmed it was true, the son gave threats to his dad but his mom advised him not to do so. She still wanted to forgive him and re-start her life but her husband was totally avoiding her (due to guilt) and was planning life with that young woman.
Her health got very bad due to depression, not eating and sleeping. My mom tried her best to console her but auntie said she was not finding enough strength to seek help through prayers. Before her death she said to my mom, **" It is so painful that my children are wishing that it would have been better that their dad had died in the plane that crashed 2 years before, at least in that case they wouldn’t have lost respect for him after seeing this aspect of his personality." **
Auntie who was very healthy and active few months back looked very weak, old and no signs of life on her face. The doctors kept reminding her that she could not survive if she doesn’t want to live. After her death, her husband didn’t attend the funeral because of the fear of her relatives, and her only son (a teenager) was found unconscious on the road at mid night, due to over drinking (he never drank before her death)…
p.s. It is a true story. I don’t want to disclose more details to keep secret their identity, but it is heart breaking to see some children wishing their dad had died in an incident he survived due to pure luck, as he ruined the life of their mother in the next coming years…
Its very sad that the father has done this, I think he himself shall learn a lesson, and wish he cauld turn back time, I know of men in my village in pak who have left their wifes, in uk wid kids and gone to Pakistan to get married to younger women, and one of them has now got 2 young kids he is over 70!!
and the wife in pak is makin demands and he cannot fulfill these and apparently he regrets the marriage and wishes he had his previous life back.
MEN!!
inshalla the children shall have someone to guide them through this rough time.
allah sayz that u get bak whtever u do! ur uncle will also get bak wat he did to his wife...how can a young gurl stay happy with an old man forever? one day she'll also leave that man n ur uncle will be left with nuthing...tht day he'll regret!
Nothing in this life is for free...we all pay a price for everthing we do. When it is something good, we might get rewarded. Whent it is something bad, we might get punished. But Allah (swt) sees all and addresses it when he sees fit.
Someone once told me a long time ago that you can either pay for your sins in this life or the next. Sometimes, depending on the sins, you may suffer a little bit in this life and Allah (swt) might (no one really knows for sure) forgive you. Then there are others who will have everything they want now and answer for it later because of the magnitude of the offense. You might not see justice right away, but it will happen.
When the family member is so close like a father or a mother, its a very conflicting feeling. You want to love them and turn back time but you cant ignore what they have done. This struggle often pushes people to give up and find relief in other places...like alcohol.
You should definitely try and gently nudge them back into a more positive frame of mind. They need someone there for them. With no mother and father gone, the kids are probably lost and bitter. It would do them good to have someone like you around.