Q. How do you stop an Indian tank?
A. Shoot the men who are pushing it.
Q. How do you disable Indian missiles?
A. Cut the rubber band.
Q. Have you ever seen Indian war heroes?
A. Neither has India.
Q. Did you hear about the other latest Indian invention?
A. The new automatic parachutes. They open on impact.
Q. How do you sink an Indian battleship?
A. Put it in water.
Q. Did you hear about the 747 jet which Crashed into a cemetery in
Delhi?
A. The Indian officials have so far Recovered 3000 bodies.
Q. Did you hear about the Indian admiral who had asked to be buried at
sea?
A. Five Indian sailors died digging his grave.
Q. Did you hear about the shutdown of the Delhi National Library?
A. Somebody stole the book.
Q. You’re locked in a room with Saddam Hussein, Adolf Hitler, and an
Indian. You have a gun with two bullets. What do you do?
A. Shoot the Indian twice to make sure he’s dead.
Q. What’s brown and black and looks great on an Indian?
A. A Doberman.
Q. How can you tell when an Indian is lying?
A. His lips are moving.
Q. What do you have when an Indian is buried up to his neck in sand?
A. Not enough sand.
Q. Did you Hear about the terrorist that hijacked a 747 full of Indians?
A. He threatened to release one every hour if his demands weren’t met.
Q: What to do if you threw a grenade at a Indian soldier?
A: Just stand there - he will throw the pin at you and he will keep the
grenade
Q: What do you do when a Indian throws a hand grenade at you?
A: Pull the pin and throw it back.
Q: What do you do when a Indian throws a pin at you?
A: Run like crazy … he has got a hand grenade in his mouth.
Q: How did the Indian try to kill the bird?
A: He threw it off a cliff.
Q: How do you disable a Indian tank?
A: “Hide the wind-up key.”
Q: Did you hear about the Indian helicopter crash?
A: The pilot felt cold, so he turned off the fan.
Q: How can you tell if a firing squad is from the Indian Battalion?
A: “They stand in a circle.”
LONG DISTANCE…
In order to develop friendly relationship between the two countries,Atal Behari Vajpayee and Pervez Musharraf decided to visit each other’s country regularly. The first visit was by Musharraf to India. There
Vajpayee showed him India’s modern telecommunication system. It was so good that Musharraf made a call to Nehru in hell and talked to him for 5 minutes! The bill for the call came to only Re.1. When Musharraf came back, he also wanted Pakistan’s telecommunication systems to be at the best when Vajpaee visited Pakistan. Suitable arrangements were made. ABV
came to Pak, visited the telecom department and talked to Nehru in hell for 5 minutes. But this time, the bill was Rs. 500! Atal asked with a sarcastic smile - "Why are telephone calls to hell so ! costly in
Pakistan? A High-level diplomat gave a smiling reply - "From India to
hell, it is a local call, Sir, while from Pakistan, it is long distance!”
One taxi driver in Delhi to another, “Did you hear that the Indian government bought a thousand “septic” tanks?”
The other driver replied, "Yes, and as soon as they learn to drive them, they’re going to invade Pakistan
- MuN laa kehNa saiaaN da..
Ghhooom jaa..
Jhooom ja..*