Salam girls…
Just want to ask about something I`m wondering about.
Who is or did pay for your wedding?
I mean ur bridal outfit, photographer, venue, food, cards, stage, decorations, your makeup and hair session for the day, your jahez (clothes etc).
My parents is paying everyting for me, but is this normal?
What is normal?
Re: Will you\did u pay for your wedding?
normaly ur parents pay for everything.....but on mine, i paid for the cake, photgrapher and the decor.....
parents gifted me with gold, clothes and they took care of the videographer, DJ and the venue...but my chachoos and phophos paid for the catering and bridal outfit....and all the bridal make-up n stuff.....
they told my parents we'r gona end up gifting ur girl anyway, so tell us how we can help instead of jus paying u cash in a card......my dad wont agree but they made him agree.....
it jus goes to show that relatives do look at these things.......they know wedding is a big expense.....and helping out is better then getting invited and jus sitting back watching the show, especially if u have sisters stil single sitting at home.....
it really hurts when u see parents paying like that...all their savings and hard work and we girls jus want a fairy tale wedding.......
thats y jus a yr in marriage and iv already started saving for my future kiddies....inshallah...:)
My family gifted me my lengha and gold only, and that was at a push because I didn't want them to pay for anything at all! Before I left home, my family tried to give me money that they were going to use for the wedding but i returned it. What's the point I thought? I only want there blessings xxxx
Some of it was sent to Pakistan to give to poor familes whose daughters were getting married.
I took the view that my family has educated me and brought me up well and I never wanted them to pay for anything because I want them to keep it for there own future rather than spend it on my wedding. I used my own savings and splashed out on all my family members for them all to have a time to remember and wear the most amazing clothes/jewellery and makeup. My husband did the exact same. This day and age, we are all very lucky to be educated which gives us all good jobs and be able to give our parents back xxxx
Ashi and Silsila, tnx for reply.
MashAllah you have such a good thinking, Silsila.
I totally agree with you. My parents are paying all the stuff for me, but I dont think its right the same way as u think. They have already given me enough. From childhood until now. All I want and need is blessings.
My dad want to buy me some furniture, but my phoppos say that they can pay as they will gift me something anyway. I dont want either my dad or my phoppo to get me furniture. But they insist.
I really apprecciate ur answers as I was sitting with the same thought as Silsila, but wasnt sure if its right to tell my parents that I want to pay on my own. Now, I can tell them...
Re: Will you\did u pay for your wedding?
Awwwwwwwwwww, maybe come to some sort of agreement, our parents want to give us everything because we are leaving home etc, but we also want them to have everything too xxxxxxxxx
My family gifted me my lengha and gold only, and that was at a push because I didn't want them to pay for anything at all! Before I left home, my family tried to give me money that they were going to use for the wedding but i returned it. What's the point I thought? I only want there blessings xxxx
Some of it was sent to Pakistan to give to poor familes whose daughters were getting married.
I took the view that my family has educated me and brought me up well and I never wanted them to pay for anything because I want them to keep it for there own future rather than spend it on my wedding. I used my own savings and splashed out on all my family members for them all to have a time to remember and wear the most amazing clothes/jewellery and makeup. My husband did the exact same. This day and age, we are all very lucky to be educated which gives us all good jobs and be able to give our parents back xxxx
wish i cud hae doen that on my wedding....but i had only been working for 4 months wen i got married so i had no savings....
had i been working for 2-3 yrs....i cud manage the whole thing on my own and i wudnt have let my parents do anything for me....:(
but my husband has ben working for 7 yrs and still his dad paid for everything...he sed he plans to spend equally on all his children.....and same with my dad...
Re: Will you\did u pay for your wedding?
awwwww that's sweet, as siblings we all try our best to do that right thing for our families, whatever himmat allah (swt) gives us, we try our best. but often we cannot ever do as much as our parents have done for us xxxx
but you have to assess the situation are in, not everyone is working when they are getting married etc etc
Re: Will you\did u pay for your wedding?
haww tum laug itnay acchay bachay ho...mashallah!
i was/still am a student and i wasn't working at the time so uhm....i had nothing to contribute but myself :@:
Re: Will you\did u pay for your wedding?
Even though i was working and had considerable savings, my parents still insisted on paying for everything and they did. I in turn tried to keep the cost as decent as possible.
For the valima, my husband paid for everything as well as my jewellery. His parents had come from Pak and they brought my clothes.
Re: Will you\did u pay for your wedding?
Mashalla Silsia and Aashi I think thats so FAB that you guys helped out with the wedding costs, you girls rock! May Allah SWT fill your marriages with so much barakah and always give your parents every happiness, Ameen
Re: Will you\did u pay for your wedding?
What about men ? Are they allowed to participate in this thread ? Some men help out parents with Shadee ka kharcha , you know .
Re: Will you\did u pay for your wedding?
im doing my wedding preps now, alhamdulilah after uni i managed to save up a bit & after a lot of arguing with my parents i managed to twist their arms & let me help out, they insisted that they paid for the food, lehnga & gold so i got to pay for the shadi & mehndi hall, deco, some of the kapre etc i feel really happy that i can help out, parents do sooo much its heartbreaking so its our farz to chip in esp wen its your own wedding! abuji is still insisting that they will give me money as dehej but iv refused- iv told them my savings r theres to use so woteva i hv left over will be enuf :)
Re: Will you\did u pay for your wedding?
I wish I could help my parents out :-( still a student... but my in-laws are paying for my outfits (both days) jewelery , photo+video and they insisted on absolutely no jahezs so my parents are only paying for wedding hall + food for Baraat... Insallah I am going to pay my parents back for all they spent on my education... Jazak-allah-khair to you girls who helped your parents out...
Re: Will you\did u pay for your wedding?
aw umeed.. i think the main thing is to have consideration 'ehsaas' & not only recognise but greatly appreciate how much parents have done & continue to do so...ofcourse if u can help out then its good but if u cant just wishing u could is enough & i no ur parents would love u even more for that...
p.s ur in laws sound like a dream! x