what does it take for a couple to always think along the line of being togetether no matter what happens in and around their lives, which otherwise, might drive them to split.
factors which can sustain a vulnerable marriage, please share.
Re: will stay together, always... no matter what
So many threads in a day , u beter share ur point of view as well :)
Re: will stay together, always... no matter what
When my cousin was getting married to an amazing man, her ultra-modern dad said a few surprising yet powerful words to her - they were along the lines that her getting married is beyond just getting dressed up and having a husband. She must understand what 'marriage' meant. He told her straight up that he never wants to hear her come to him to bad-mouth her husband or expect his involvement in her personal life. This marriage basically meant she burn her bridges - she has to put everything in this marriage, through the good and the bad. There is no turning back.
Alhamdullillah, she went in this marriage thinking this is it and that's the mentality you should have: I will make this work with all I have.
Re: will stay together, always... no matter what
loyality and respect.. remove any of these factors from a relationship and it will be dead
Re: will stay together, always... no matter what
wasteful to think always and forever.
Re: will stay together, always... no matter what
Relationships is a science now. Something which works in one case might not work in other case.
For example a husband and wife still click even though they have different tastes and different interests.
In other cases they do not click even though they share tastes and interests.
As someone above said , getting married is not like buying dresses or not about having a spouse. It is a garden being tendered by two gardeners, it needs constant nurturing , maintenance and hard work. It goes through various seasons and weather patterns . If those two gardeners want to see their garden flourishing they should co-operate , consult , plan in unison.
Re: will stay together, always... no matter what
@croquet: Look up news that a french husband and wife committed suicide at age 83 and 82. Wife was terminally ill and was about to die any moment. They couldn't bear the thought of seperation, so they slept peacefully through a lethal injection. They were married for over 50 years. I think that constitutes as ALWAYS AND FOREVER!
Don't be pessamistic about love. It can do amazing things - you only need to beleive in it.
Marrige always goes through ups and downs. When it is down, you have have to remember it will come back up! The secret to not let it fall apart: COMMUNICATION.
Communicate / talk / interaction should always be happening - no matter how good / bad things are going :)
Re: will stay together, always... no matter what
love
communication
respect
loyality
love can last forever and always, my hubbi says even when we are on our death we will never argue, or fight as long we continue to love each other
I think developing a strong bond is the key to a strong marriage. Little things like, no matter HOW angry you are with your spouse, or whatever huge disagreement you have, do NOT ever go and lean on your family's shoulders and be a tattletale!
Remember, no real relationship is perfect. There will always be a day when you might just not like him very much and he the same. But please, DON'T ever go talk about it to anyone. Respect begets respect. Most of us girls tend to be chatty and whiny by nature. But obviously, we'd hate it too if our husbands were to discuss our little arguments or differences with their moms/ sisters.
Re: will stay together, always... no matter what
definitely, newly weds must stay together and ideally all caring couples should dtrive to convince each other to stay together, unless for economic and career benefits, one place is better for both or one, intially.
but, still, home and spouse must not be made a second priority.
Re: will stay together, always... no matter what
love for Allah swt and the Prophet pbuh. If this love honest and oure the couple will stay together.
Re: will stay together, always… no matter what
I always think, if I have an issue, I will tell HIM and not the rest of the world. If we actually want to work through things, we come to each other first. The only other people I sometimes complain to about him (and it’s not the serious stuff, just like his need for all the latest and expensive electronic toys 
) are his mother or his sister, and that’s more in fun and when he’s actually around. I don’t complain to my mother, father, brothers, friends, etc about him.
I really take seriously the Quranic metaphor about how husband and wife are clothes for each other. They cover up the flaws and the intimate details, and they accentuate the good.
I also know myself, and know my tendency to be a know-it-all ( 
), as well as have a short fuse. I’m a lot to put up with, and he is incredibly kind and patient. I appreciate that.
Re: will stay together, always... no matter what
trust and only trust
totally agree with u Sahar 
i dont believe in talking about your spouse to anyone. (well the bad anyways.. as there is simply no need)
and thats where the trust comes in too, i guess. We trust one another to keep each others faults with us and not have them discussed with every other member of the family… or even friends. If there is an issue, we both stick together and try to resolve it… its our marriage, not someone else’s.
When my cousin was getting married to an amazing man, her ultra-modern dad said a few surprising yet powerful words to her - they were along the lines that her getting married is beyond just getting dressed up and having a husband. She must understand what 'marriage' meant. He told her straight up that he never wants to hear her come to him to bad-mouth her husband or expect his involvement in her personal life. This marriage basically meant she burn her bridges - she has to put everything in this marriage, through the good and the bad. There is no turning back.
Alhamdullillah, she went in this marriage thinking this is it and that's the mentality you should have: I will make this work with all I have.
That actually upsets me quite a bit. It's the same as a parent telling you that they're disowning you.
Equally horrendous when we're expected to marry.
Re: will stay together, always... no matter what
^ really? I thought it was good that a parent is actually telling the daughter not to involve them in personal matters.
I mean, why would I want to burden my parents with an issue i have with my hubby. If hubby and I cant solve it on our own, then there are real issues there (and im talking only about myself.. not about anyone)
Plus, I want to shield my hubby from anyone else's bad thoughts and judgements about him... so i actually think what the father said to his daughter was quite good.
"Love between souls" last longer than anything else. If only we sincerely keep thinking and act in accordance of what positive changes and improvements can we bring in the life of our spouse, instead of expecting anything in return, our married life achieves a meaning worth living for.
Every good action has at least some good reaction, sooner or later. If one leads by example in every field of life, by keeping oneself busy in satisfying the legal needs of one's spouse with sincere prayers and having faith, inshaAllah sooner or later s/he would be able to see in his/her spouse what s/he always desired / wished for.
May Allah (swt) bless us with the wisdom and strength of consuming all our energy on positive thoughts and actions in favor of our spouse with least (humanly possible) expectations.
^ really? I thought it was good that a parent is actually telling the daughter not to involve them in personal matters.
I mean, why would I want to burden my parents with an issue i have with my hubby. If hubby and I cant solve it on our own, then there are real issues there (and im talking only about myself.. not about anyone)
Plus, I want to shield my hubby from anyone else's bad thoughts and judgements about him... so i actually think what the father said to his daughter was quite good.
Exactly, sadzzz. I think it's far from disowning, it's simply telling the daughter, don't come to me crying like you did when you were little - now you have to turn to your partner and solve your own problems.
what does it take for a couple to always think along the line of being togetether no matter what happens in and around their lives, which otherwise, might drive them to split.
factors which can sustain a vulnerable marriage, please share.
trust ,honestly,sincerity and understanding is the key to sucess..the base of every true relationshippp and the glue that holds the realtionship together