Re: widows gettin married
People are sick and they just need a reason to talk 
Re: widows gettin married
it is noble on the part of a true suitor to be able to marry with respect and love, a widow.
same is true for widowers. especially, when they have children from the late and departed partner.
human nature is based on friendship and no where else, but in a married couple's status is it the most powerful and fully capable of securing each other, through mental and emotional bonding.
people who bad mouth widows and widowers, when they want to remarry, is not something to worry about or feel guilt due to.
sometimes, very attached surviving partners need to see someone they can hold on to, just to be able to live with the memories of their departed partners.
it is all based on the personal strength of the surviving partner as well.
but, still no one else has any right to stop the survivor from remarrying.
women and men, both need a life long partnership.
may it be that most couple livbe together as long as their time is destined for them to live.
ameen.
Re: widows gettin married
^ye well said...
It seems that people look at a widow from the "glorious" point of view, but what people forget is that there is trauma involved for losing a loved one. Life goes on, a widow has every right to continue her life the way she wishes.
hinduism exist way before the advent of Islam. it was their practice to segregate widows from the society. but then Prophet Muhammad PBUH himself married a widow (Hazrat Khijeh RA)
even today we see traces of these norms as part of our culture especially during the wedding where widows are kept away from the bride cuz its considered a “bad shagoon”…yeh baat to app maan lain k literacy rate of pakistan is 
and then indian-bollywood movies work as cherry on top of jahalat cake.
Re: widows gettin married
c if i cud have the capabilty to do a great thing, i would have taken out all the evil tongues out of ppl's mouth, as they enjoy wenevr they get a chance, whenever they find othr person suitable for it but wen it's their turn they start blaberring. they present bfor u a 100 n1 reasons so u can think them not guilty. but Allah is there doing justice, he will b wid everyone, as the famous saying goes " whatever you sow, you are to reap". it is a vicious circle, no deed goes unpunished, sooner or later the result will come.
Re: widows gettin married
widows being married again isnt as big of a deal than a divorced women (with kids). Men generally tend to believe that it was all the woman's fault for being divorced the first time and then they hesitate to marry them the second time.
Re: widows gettin married
^ some people can think the same for a widow........
Re: widows gettin married
^ that she is unlucky or something. yes it's ridiulous isn't it? it goes the same for a divorced woman :o
Re: widows gettin married
well, I believe God is still "the Boss" pulling all the strings.
No need to curse poor girl.
It is sad indeed.
Re: widows gettin married
My point is, it's silly to think that a widow is unlucky and thats' why she should never coem near a bride( someone posted that above).
It's also silly to think that a divorced woman will never remarry cz most guys think they were always at fault. Noone ever thinks of a divorced/widowed man in that way, and it's time these stupid thinkings stop for women as well.
Re: widows gettin married
Very sad.
When a wife dies - everyone encourages the man to re-marry as quickly as possible even if it is two weeks after her death.
When a husband dies, the wife is encouraged to grieve for him forever!
This has been happening in my family for years. Very sad.
A widow has the right to marry if she wants. To my knowledge, Islam doesn't prohibit her from remarrying. The idea that a widow should drape herself in white and mourn her husband's death till eternity is a hindu practice just like women being pressured to bring jahez/dowry for the groom and his family. Pakistan and India used to be one country and many of the superstitions (widows being unlucky, for example) and traditions intermingled. The importance is to verify the ideas through Islam.
I know that even young women (in their 20s) who are divorced are shunned in Pakistan. I've even been told that if a rishta happens to come for the poor girl, the neighbors rush to the prospective family and tell them to stay away from the "divorced girl". I've also heard aunties ACTUALLY discouraging their daughters from getting a Master's Degree for fear that it might hinder her rishta prospects, as she shouldn't appear smarter than the guy.
I know this thread is about whether or not widows should get married. But some of the narrow-minded views in Desi culture are UNBELIEVABLY RIDICULOUS! They have no place in Islam. And it seems that people have intermingled culture and religion together so much that there are many misconceptions.
It's EVEN SADDER to see WOMEN putting FELLOW WOMEN down with these ABSURD BELIEFS. Women are an integral part of society just like men. The two genders compliment one another. How is desi society supposed to move forward and progress as a whole, if the women are criticized and discouraged from achieving basic rights (remarriage, for example)......and that too by OTHER WOMEN????!!!!!!!!!
YIKES, that is so sad!
Re: widows gettin married
do you know there are some people who
talk, talk, talk, their lives away
Don’t even hesitate
Walking on down to the burial ground
It’s a very old dance with a merry old sound