Why work/Have a career?

Lifestyle Relationships
1

I mean why do we really need to study and learn and work 80 hour weeks? Its not like we can not make a decent living otherwise? And if you were single then you can easily have a very decent living without having such a career.

That leads me to think that a lot of us do all we can just because of family (meaning once we have sort of achieved our educational pursuits and a certain earning power, we are no longer doing it for ourselves). And that derives primarly from the the societial culture and expectations. Hence why are we then surprised (like some people prefer to claim here) when everything leads towards a family structure that there is so much pressure for people to get married/cohabit etc.

2

To some extent commitments/responsibilities and expectations etc may be driving your efforts, but it still is impacted by your aspirations and interests. If you are pursuiong a career mostly, or simply for responsiobilities sake, then you are not being honestto yourself.

3

You study and work hard to acheive the goals you have set for yourself. In most cases the driving factor is to make more money.

4

all human beings are born with a want for betterment, i think that without something stable in ure life, at least one thing u know you can always improve and achieve more of, then your life would be considerably meaningless and you would lose interest

:konfused: thats my opinion anyway

5

[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by Fraudz: *
To some extent commitments/responsibilities and expectations etc may be driving your efforts, but it still is impacted by your aspirations and interests. If you are pursuiong a career mostly, or simply for responsiobilities sake, then you are not being honestto yourself.
[/QUOTE]

Ok then tell me what the aspirations are? Make the most amount of money? Make a name for ourselves? Leave a name behind? (All btw way are some sort of societal recognitions). Other then truely enjoying the work you do I have not been able to figure out an alternate to the family/societal expectations thinking.

Think of it this way, if you suddenly did not have any family (no relatives, no spouse etc), and you didnt care what society thought about you, what would you be doing? Would you still be working hard to save that money for the kids, wife, would you buy life insurance or deal with retirement plans? I think if people really suddenly said, if there was no family around me how much of my motivation would be due to them, they would truely realize how much it drives our whole lifes. Personally I feel 90% or more of my motivation comes entirely from the family/societal norms thing.

6

[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by sky: *
You study and work hard to acheive the goals you have set for yourself. In most cases the driving factor is to make more money.
[/QUOTE]

Why money? what does it get you? Fame ? Which again is a societal factor? Why do we desire to have fame? perhaps for the same reasons girls try so hard to become docs in Pakistan and then become housewifes once they get married :). It again for most purposes boils down to the family thing.

7

Which just goes to prove my point. Btw with half the people splitting up in the west, I am not sure family is stable. The notion might but not the actual family unit.

8

Welcome to the Real World. ..finally hmcq has started thinking.. :)

that's the master plan of the bankers.. keep you involved in the money game.. . shove 'family' in your face wherever you go. it's in the movies.. it's on TV.. it's in high tax rates for singles.. it's around you.. u just cannot escape that pressure to procreate and become more of a slave than you were when on your own..

Human beings have this inherent tendency to 'want more' .. the smartest amongst us exploit it.. .. that's what took us from the caves to the highrises.. that and the fact that we prolly couldn't afford one of our own in a good neighborhood away from the predators anyway..

9

I don't think...well ok let me think about this and ramble a bit...

I want a career that i love and feel challenged in, have successes in and am able to feel and show that i have learned and advanced...this career path not only offers me emotional benefits but I would also want a certain amount of financial benefit. This is all a personal indivdual thought process...

HOWEVER, I did not choose certain fields even though the financial benefit was high because the emotional issues were also high...because I thought of being involved in a family and what if and what would happen....

another example would be that i would love to do international public health work but won't because i have a spouse and want to think about him..NOW yes..i do think that way because i am married BUT i also thought that way before i got married/knew him...because i knew i would marry and wanted to pick a career path that would help that...

hmmm don't know if i answered your questions hmcq

10

hmcq,
this stuff often bothers me too and makes me wonder if the way we live our lives is sane at all...?
everything we do today is due to the way we are 'supposed' to be, the way our society or culture wants us to be or the way we have to be to be accepted...it's pathetic really. if you get down to it, who wants to spend every beautiful morning of his life at a desk in an office in some buliding away from home or personal passions. ppl drain themselves all thei lives for what...? money...and money drives everything, you have the money, you have the beutiful young wife, you have good children, you are accepted and looked upon with respect in society, nobody gives a damn how you make your dough youre a smuggler nobody cares, but if you dont have a huge bank a/c youre the filthiest creature and you dont deserve a good wife, nor a life nor a family, nor settling down nor having kids...and if you somehown endup making money by the time youre 40 and get accepted it's still too late to start a family in the perfetc manner...this society of ours drives us insane, we are turning into machines.
i for one admit here, that if i didnt have standards to meet, or didnt have responsibilities or didnt have goals to achieve, by choice or by default, i would have been a diff person, in a diff career living a diff and perhaps happy life. i would have been a traveller, an explorer, i would climb the mountains and see what this world has in store which we are never going to see locked up in our class rooms or office desks.
i wonder how it feels to be on top of everest and breathe the unpolluted fresh and freezing air, how it feels to drive through the sahara, how it feels to trek in the amazon forests...

11

[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by PakistaniAbroad: *
Welcome to the Real World. ..finally hmcq has started thinking.. :)

that's the master plan of the bankers.. keep you involved in the money game.. . shove 'family' in your face wherever you go. it's in the movies.. it's on TV.. it's in high tax rates for singles.. it's around you.. u just cannot escape that pressure to procreate and become more of a slave than you were when on your own..

Human beings have this inherent tendency to 'want more' .. the smartest amongst us exploit it.. .. that's what took us from the caves to the highrises.. that and the fact that we prolly couldn't afford one of our own in a good neighborhood away from the predators anyway..
[/QUOTE]

huh??? I have been real for a long time PA. The fact that its posted here just means I had time to write it out :). But more seriously, what I said applied to everyone not just non-bankers. Its sort of a draw upon Darwins theory that we are there to spread our genes in the genepool. And hence everything we do rotates around it. And in the final summation, it all comes down to family/procreation.

12

[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by amelie: *
because I thought of being involved in a family and what if and what would happen....

..NOW yes..i do think that way because i am married BUT i also thought that way before i got married/knew him...because i knew i would marry and wanted to pick a career path that would help that...
[/QUOTE]

First let me say: Is there a point to my thread... probably not...just a philosophical point of view to consider.

Amelie: The above only points to the fact that you did all you did in your career cause your family rather then something else.

13

I thought i did it because of the lifestyle i wanted with my family?

14

thats what I was saying...to a large extent our careers and everything else we do is based on our family. So its almost like you are born grow up and then you start working to ensure that your kids or your parents or anyone else related to you gets things/etc in their lifes. Other then, what really is the reason for us to alive at say 30,40,50,70yrs old? Are there really any other end goals? Do we really just live to be 50yrs old to better humanity? Perhaps the the question I ask in a different set of words is what is the meaning of life and from all I can tell its family or furthering your share of the genepool or somehow else getting yourself remembered.

15

*Originally posted by hmcq: *

**Ok then tell me what the aspirations are? {/B]

List your aspirations, when you were a kid and wanted to do something, was it due to interest and aspiration or was it because you knew you will be supporting a wife, 2 kids, a mistress and a drug habit 25 years later?

Other then truely enjoying the work you do I have not been able to figure out an alternate to the family/societal expectations thinking.

And I hope that people are dping what they truly enjoy, or are in pursuit of it.

*Think of it this way, if you suddenly did not have any family (no relatives, no spouse etc), and you didnt care what society thought about you, what would you be doing? *

So by your viewpoint, a bachelor with no family can just watch on his bum, scratching his balls while collecting welfare checks?

You will still be doing something that you enjoy..maybe you will have more freedom to be able to take chances than someone who has responsibilities. but thats about it.. Motivation should come from within, you should not feel forced to work, but be motivated to excel in what you do and reach your potential.

*Would you still be working hard to save that money for the kids, wife, would you buy life insurance or deal with retirement plans? *

Motivation is not the same thing as fulfilling responsibility.

** Personally I feel 90% or more of my motivation comes entirely from the family/societal norms thing. **

Then we are on the opposite ends of the spectrum..my motivation comes from doing what I like to do, working hard at it, learnign more, improving my skills etc. The fact that it pays the bill is a good thing too, but i have alwayshad the option to quit all this work business and open a gas station and still be able to meet my financial obligations.

Whereas it would be easier for me to try out radically different things if I did not have responsibilities, I would still be trying to do the best I could and reach my potential in whatever I was doing.

16

Think about it this way, if u had billions of dollars, u could choose to just sit and chill or do something, anything that is of interest and try to do it to your best..the responsibilities dont factor in then, cuz resource limitations are not an issue. aside from some spoilt oil sheikhs, I dont think anyone would just sit idle and not pursue something.

17

Fraudia: We do a lot of saving up of resourses in our lifetime. Why? Take out the family factor and you dont have a lot of reasons to do that. May be that explains why certain stereotypes exist about people who havent had a strong family bond when growing up in terms of what they end up doing.

18

saving for a rainy day perhaps?

19

just for yourself or for all the family? now take out the family and figure out how much you would really just save for yourself? And would you ever need life insurance in that case?