~! Why men should lower their gazes, (Sick!)

Lifestyle Relationships
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Re: ~! Why men should lower their gazes, (Sick!)

People judge other people, whoever doesnt understand this is either too naive or just plain stupid. Saying that even if the girl dresses provocatively the guys should lower their gaze is hypocritical. Not all guys pass comments and not all girls dress provocatively. However the chances of catcalls do increase if you are dressed in a certain way. And it is not just a desi thing.

Go ahead kill me now.

Afia Siddiqui
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Re: ~! Why men should lower their gazes, (Sick!)

girls talk about it, why cant we?

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Re: ~! Why men should lower their gazes, (Sick!)

So TRUE!! :clap: :salute:

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Re: ~! Why men should lower their gazes, (Sick!)

believe it or not... i've heard some desi guy saying that he finds girls in hijab extremely sexy! lolz
now i can safely say its all abt how clean/dirty a person's mind is.
sometimes u juz cant help not lowering ur gazes when u see silly galz making a fool out of themselves tryin to look sexy or wateva, exposing unnecessarily blah blah blah....
its ok to have fun and a gud laff over jokes when ur with ur bunch of friends but as respectable ppl we shud always maintain a limit. and we shud mind our jokes when we're in da company of ppl we dun really know who might get offended with our not so modest jokes :D otherwise.... wats da harm in some fun and laughter? its not like we gonna remember any of those galz or da jokes da next morning.

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Re: ~! Why men should lower their gazes, (Sick!)

That's fine Ashley, but people should just not justify their behaviour by saying, Islam tells women to cover up and they deserve it if they don't. Islam does not allow or encourage men to act like chichoray either and harrass women because of how she may be dressed.

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Re: ~! Why men should lower their gazes, (Sick!)

My PERSONAL opinion is that SOME women are to blame for this. If they are going to dress VERY provocatively then they should expect some comments, suggestions, stares etc...i know it's not nice, not fair but it's true.

The other day i was on my way to work and i saw a woman walking in front of me she was wearing a see through dress and you could clearly see her thong and bum through it. There were a few guys walking by all in suits going to work...none of them made any comments but every single one of them looked at her ass....i saw a couple of guys whisper at each other too.

I really don't think it was my fault or the guys walking past...if she didn't want us to see then she shoulddn't have put it there in front of us...we have eyes too see...we can't walk to work with our eyes fixed on to the ground!

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Re: ~! Why men should lower their gazes, (Sick!)

In the western world women like to dress attractively. Personal taste varies widely and some women take it too far but the idea of covering up just doesnt work in the west.

Also in the west, "girl watching" is a most popular sport for the guys and is also widely accepted - within limits. Ie., keep rude comments to yourself, look but dont touch and dont get too lewd with the ogling.

Muslim culture doesnt allow this at all and is obviously at odds with the west in this. But its simply a cultural difference.

If you are to fit in in western society, its something that you have to accept but not necessarily agree with. The guys in the example were obviously taking things too far....but say you're a muslim working in a white-collar profession....your boss and/or your colleagues may be attractive and "attractively" dressed women - ie, short sleeves, button-down blouse, skirt, high heels. You'll just have to deal with it....i mean are you going to keep your eyes downcast on an interview or in an important meeting? You wouldnt be taken seriously.

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Re: ~! Why men should lower their gazes, (Sick!)

moral- some people are full of shhit, and sad but true that there is pretty much nothing one can do about it

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Re: ~! Why men should lower their gazes, (Sick!)

Just like you are not justifying slutty dressing by siding with women who dress provocatively, I am not justifying lewd remarks by men. hope you understand where I am coming from.

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Re: ~! Why men should lower their gazes, (Sick!)

Afridi, you obviously have double standards. You go around preaching islam as if you were born with a beard but then you go around justifying this cheap behaviour by guys like YOU. You're saying it's OK to act disrespectful and say disgusting things to and about women who don't live up to YOUR standard. You put a big fat '786' in your name and it's OBVIOUS you don't know the FIRST thing about Islam which says lower your gaze regardless. People like YOU have hijacked Islam with your double standards, hypocricy, and plain stupidity.

HOW DARE YOU go around acting like you're the perfect muslim in other threads and have the GALL to say something as IDIOTIC as what you did about it being justifiable to treat girls, albeit scantily dressed girls, the way these guys in crescent's story did. Dude, you have lost ALL credibility when it comes to theological debate based on your comments. What you call 'all in good fun' is repulsive behaviour according to Islam.

I would recommend that you go home, take the Quran from the top shelf in your closet, it's probably wrapped up in some cloth. I suggest that you read this book, not just walk under it and kiss it when you're going on a long trip, there's a lot of good stuff in this book, I promise you. And there's absolutely NO nonsense in this book that will justify your attitude.

Good effing day!

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Re: ~! Why men should lower their gazes, (Sick!)

Mama, I agree with what you say. The “lower your gaze” is as much allegorical as literal. In fact, Islam actually recognizes that men will appreciate a woman’s beauty. Here’s a verse from the Quran:

[33:52] Beyond the categories described to you, you are enjoined from marrying any other women, nor can you substitute a new wife (from the prohibited categories), no matter how much you ADMIRE THEIR BEAUTY. You must be content with those already made lawful to you. GOD is watchful over all things.

This means that the Quran recognizes that men and women both will admire beauty in other men and women. Period. You can look at a beautiful person and admire their beauty. In fact, the minute you attribute their beauty to God, that turns into a form of worship, e.g. “Wow, that woman is stunning, God be glorified”.

Hotel room
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Re: ~! Why men should lower their gazes, (Sick!)

Bhai saab thanda paani

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Re: ~! Why men should lower their gazes, (Sick!)

..."In fact, the minute you attribute their beauty to God, that turns into a form of worship, e.g. "Wow, that woman is stunning, God be glorified"...."

Mr A, thats a wonderful way of looking at this situation and also allowing for cultural differences to co-exist when "east meets west".

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Re: ~! Why men should lower their gazes, (Sick!)

It's a good thing that ignorant attracts the ignorant and the sleazy attract the sleazy...

It's also a good thing if guys like these honk and make catcalls at ladies like these because, for obvious reasons, they like that and wish to be treated as such...

Why do we dress formally when going to a meeting? Because the impression we want to give is of someone who is proper and prim. Why do we dress down at a casual event? Because we wantr to portray the image that we are relaxed and at ease...

So when ladies wear these types of clothes, isn't it obvious they want catcalls coming their way? And the more catcalls they get, the better they feel about themselves...

Why does a prostitute dress provocatively the way she does? It's to attract the kind of people she is looking for...And only those who are attracted know how to treat these women...

And it's a good thing these guys made catcalls...Otherwise girls like their mentality if they don't get enough catcalls, they'll probably start dressing even more sluttishly...

So, it's a good thing that birds of a feather stick together...The girls dressed to get attention from certain type of people, those certain type of people got attracted, catcalls exchanged, the guys got what they wanted, the girls got what they wanted and that's that...

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Re: ~! Why men should lower their gazes, (Sick!)

:k:
i always like reading your posts:)

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Re: ~! Why men should lower their gazes, (Sick!)

me too, very amusing!

Allow me to expound....

"...So when ladies wear these types of clothes, isn't it obvious they want catcalls coming their way? And the more catcalls they get, the better they feel ...."

We were talking about "Western Ladies' Business Attire", not micro-mini-skirts and spike heels here.

Mr Lajo I DO respect your "severely" (for lack of a better word) Muslim outlook on this topic and it fits in very nicely in a Muslim society. It does not however, fit in all too comfortably in the western world.

Once again....my point was that western women try to wear attractive WESTERN business attire. Men admire. Not a big deal to either the men or the women unless its taken too far but its only the "lowlifes" that DO take it too far. If a Muslim man downcasts his eyes in a western professional capacity on the fact that there is an attractive western woman present, well then the Muslim man will never advance or be taken seriously. So if that is your way of thinking then you will do better to stay away from the west.

"...if they don't get enough catcalls, they'll probably start dressing even more sluttishly..."

I have NEVER seen this in practice and have lived in the West all my life. Perhaps you hang out in the wrong places (or the RIGHT ones...depending on your point of view?!!)

Last but not least, its a cultural difference, one that is very difficult to accept, overcome or understand - on EITHER side of the issue.

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Re: ~! Why men should lower their gazes, (Sick!)

Lajjo: why do you always offend people from your responses. Why O Why?

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Re: ~! Why men should lower their gazes, (Sick!)

Thats what I was trying to get at here Mr AQ.....

Mr L's views are just fine in Pak....a woman wearing a typical women's business suit and heels over there would get a pretty nasty response....but in the west, its the thing to do.

So what we need to do is accept cultural differences yeah? I mean when I'm "over there", I cover myself etc etc and would expect lewd stares and comments from men if I wore western clothing. Even so, I got some crotch-grabbing and lewd comments from men just because. There are dirtbags to be found where ever you may go on the planet.

Over here tho, I wear western clothing and do not expect lewd stares and comments. An appreciative look is ok, and actually makes me feel good, like I'm an attractive person but that does not make me a slut or anything close to it. Theres a huge difference between an "appreciative look" and a "lewd ogle" if you can understand. I think perhaps you have to live in western society for a while to be able to understand the culture...thats the important thing though. Understand and accept that there are people different from you, respect them for what and who they are .... and they will be so much more likely to accept YOU for what YOU are.

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Re: ~! Why men should lower their gazes, (Sick!)

Mamma! :eek: don’t ya know! this concept of “accept this culture and be respectful of it, as I respect yours” only applies to goras in muslim lands, never vice versa :slight_smile:

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Re: ~! Why men should lower their gazes, (Sick!)

Ofcourse afridi. U pretty much reduce guys to the level of animals with such statements. Do they not have any decency or self-control themselves? Is the onus not on them in the above mentioned scenario too?