Why is his mother against the her?

[schmeardo]

Re: Why is his mother against the her?

I totally agree… the problem is that she is not getting to pick a wife for her son, a wife who (as you said) “would do anything his mother asked and then some.”

This is what happened to me, too. In my case, my MIL got to pick the girl she liked. She started our rishta process and once my husband and I got to know each other, we said yes. However, I still ended up having problems with her for the past couple of years because her expectations are abnormal and I’m not the kind of girl who would do anything she asks and then some.

@terebina786

HA! This is my current status right now. I’ve been with fiance for 7 years and his mother has outright REFUSED to meet me because I’m Paki (he’s Bengali). She’s disrespected my family on several occasions and left my fiance apologizing for her actions. Her latest thing is that the poor dear thinks I’m too fat (uh ok?) and for my health’s sake (which has NO idea about.. btw my health is PERFECT) I should lose weight and only then will she approve of me. So yeah, basically we’re going ahead and getting married and she can do whatever she wants. I’m really beginning to think she has a few screws loose.

I’m pretty sure her problem is, and always has been, that she wanted to pick her son’s wife, a wife that would do anything his mother asked and then some. I think when mothers aren’t accepting of their son’s wife, fiance, girlfriend, etc it’s because she’s lost control to a woman that SHE did not pick and they feel like they’re “losing” their son. What they don’t realise is that they’re driving their son away by behaving this way.

I agree with everyone else who said if the guy has a father/brother/cousin.. anyone really, who is ok with it, get the process started with them. That’s what we did so my lovely future MIL has two choices - show up and look presentable or sit at home and stew in her own stupidity.