why flower instead bag in hand of asian brides?

Lifestyle Wedding, Fashion & Beauty
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o my God
i dont know whenevre i see an indian or pakistan bride whom take a bunch of flower in her hand instead a traditional bag i feel so nerveous!

why they follow west tradtion mixing with their own?
if they like west tradtion so why they dont go for a simple white gown to handle flower but realy wearing an asian dress with full of shining colors & works & stones & etc on dress wont match with a colorful bunch of flower!
why they cant feel flowers will destroy their dress look or their dress look like an over work with flowers in hand!

i dont know wat u all feel but i feel so bad when someone doing same!if u dont like bags atleast leave it dont take flower instead its look like u try to do anything by any cost!
like a pakistani girl wore a under skirt under her lehenga & i was mad why does she?!

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Re: why flower instead bag in hand of asian brides?

Ummm, well most of us are born and brought up abroad, and well we have a mix cultural background so its kinda nice if we take some elements to show our diversity. personally i probably will have flowers but not clashing with my dress, some combinations have been really ugly like bright dress and bright flowers looks kinda tacky but u can do it very elegantly aswell.

:)

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Re: why flower instead bag in hand of asian brides?

First of all, why are you getting all worked up at what other people are wearing at their weddings?? It's their day and they can get married in whatever they wish.
Furthermore, not everyone has to fit into a neat little pile of what YOU personally like. No one asked your opinion on it, and to someone else, your choices could be really tacky as well. Why criticize someone else for a choice THEY make for THEMSELVES on THEIR wedding day?

Not all Pakistanis follow strict codes of how to dress/how not to and if they want to hold a bunch of friggin flowers on their big day, then NO ONE should tell them that they can't.

I'm so tired of this conformist mentality, anyway, rant over.

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Re: why flower instead bag in hand of asian brides?

P.S. I think you should really get a life if you get mad at someone wearing an underskirt under a lehnga!!

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Re: why flower instead bag in hand of asian brides?

Waisey, what's inside the bag? She definitely doesn't need makeup or a cell phone. What's with the bag? bags go with evening wear when you go to a party as you are carrying some teeny things and instead of carrying a casual big black bag you have during the daytime, you carry a pretty little evening bag. But why at a wedding?

Flowers are symbolic during weddings...hence the gajras and phoolon key haar and throwing petals on the brides way....

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Re: why flower instead bag in hand of asian brides?

I only recall one desi bride who held flowers in her hand when she made her entrance into the hall. I don't recall that she ever threw the bouquet of flowers.....the tradition where the catcher is next one to be married. Don't think she did that.

I never thought of it as copying a Western tradition. Niksik is right in that we desis also use flowers in our wedding celebrations....we use them in our hall decor as well. Live and let live. It's their wedding......a once in a life time event.....and they're going to do whatever they want to make it special and memorable for them. You arrange your wedding the way you want to. Live and let live.

I personally would prefer the bag instead of holding the flowers...just I like that look better.

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Re: why flower instead bag in hand of asian brides?

i prefer flowers in the hand...then again i'm half paki and was born and raised in the west so maybe that's why. also the white bridal trend is because of western influences...so do girls taht chose white on their valima day annoy you too bc culturally white is a color for widows

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Re: why flower instead bag in hand of asian brides?

If someone grows up in the west, obviously they are going to be influenced by the west. You can't force someone who was raised in the west and may have never visited India/Pakistan to have a 100% desi wedding. They are going to add concepts that they know of.

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Re: why flower instead bag in hand of asian brides?

I dont think flowers look tacky, I think they do make the bride look fresh. Just make sure you have a nice bouquet (not too heave/full) with neutral colors to enhance the color of the dress.

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Re: why flower instead bag in hand of asian brides?

why some ppl start fighting when they see anything against their idea on GS?
i asked why cuz i felt its realy looks too much not asking an individula bride why u do ,u shouldnt do?u should go as i say! i just feel bad so i asked why they do cuz still majority of pakistanies handle bags...thats all so when u post here write ur idea like some other ppl did & explian no need to fight that im enemy of anyone cuz i dont like that thing!

wat i was asking to why, the reason wasnt my own idea the reason is a abt art-fashion rules(real formal dress up not on fashion show ramps to do anything to actch eyes!)....in matching first important thing is that u shouldnt do something that eyes wont see the main thing...
in wedding dress up surely dress is main not wat u handle in ur hand(if u r disagree that main is ur hand then thats else opinion)...so when u worked these much stones & etc on ur dress then a flower in hand make ur dress looks too much or same color flower(thats the worst) realy doesnt let see ur dress beauty...

i know thoes who handle flowers doing this cuz they effected by west but i meant to ask why they dont follow something that will match their culture i didnt mean if u go according west u r this that!
i know pakistanies use many flowers on stage on passage & etc & its nice realy but in their hand it seem too much....bags r optional u want go or not cuz atleast no harm nor use...
but still wish to know have anyone felt flowers r too much with dress or may u dont feel....or any other reason than effected by west?

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Re: why flower instead bag in hand of asian brides?

^Nobody is fighting, Paliz. But look at your post..and read it again. You're using words such as "I feel so bad"...."I feel so nervous".........as if it's a very very very serious issue. It almost gives the vibe that "Haai Allah....phool pakar kar aa rahi hai dulhan....ab kya hoga....haai haai....poora look kharab ho gaya....ghazab ho gaya....satyaa naas ho gaya." Now of course....that is not what you said....but that's the kind of vibe that your post gives when you say that you feel "nervous." Nervous is a rather strong reaction.

Ab koi bag pakray ya phool.......tumhari shaadi to nahin hai......aur na tum ne shadi ki arrangements par paisay kharach karnay hain........to itni tension lenay ki/nervous honay ki/blood pressure ko raise karnay ki kya zaroorat hai?

There are soooooooooo many choices in fashion. I absolutely love this bridal dress by Karma that is tiffany blue and red. Now that is not a common color combination and some people think it is too bold/loud and even unattractive. But I LOVE it. Fashion can be flexible with rules sometimes. Ab tum yeh sochti ho k sab kuch matching hona chahiye. Zaroori to nahin hai k aisa ho. In fact......bahut ziyada matchy matchy hona....is not encouraged in the fashion world. A few bold colors add an area of interest and make the overall look pop....if done correctly.

Fashion can be a blend of east and west. For example the fishtail or mermaid lehnga....that's more western. Or wearing a kurta over jeans....that's a combo of east and west. So many choices and ways to go about doing things. It's only a bouquet of flowers. One little thing doesn't make a whole wedding seem western. And there are some western brides who might not decide to carry flowers. The beauty of a wedding is the choices and options one has.

And there are many options and colors in flowers....a bride can pick flowers that compliment her clothing as well....or that go along with the color scheme of the decor, etc. And even if she doesn't pick something that matches..........it doesn't matter.....her wedding. Drink a cool glass of water to calm yourself down.....have fun at the wedding....eat the dinner....go home....and live and let live.

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Re: why flower instead bag in hand of asian brides?

^
ok ok ill drink glass...
realy i feel bad so i said my own feelings i didnt went & catch that brides who does for fighting...lol
anyway i know all may do so diffrent & ppl have diffrent choices but in designs it can be dress/decor/home/city or anything there r some rules according human nature emotion & psycology & mind peace(that manytimes thoes who call themselves designers even doesnt care it).
so going according designs rules never make anyone feel nerveous! specially when u r not into these rules u may not feel....
personal choice is something else, u see & u choose but according designs laws u shouldnt expect wat u choose is nice but Always if wat u choosed will follow main rules of designs then no one feel bad abt it(rather u find an extera ordinary) cuz human nature is same beyond all culture!

let me give u an example for a bedroom one girl wanted choose a red-black theme & may many of u will feel o so nice imagin how it will turn out romantic or ooooooooo so qute & fashion or any good idea....but as a designer even if i imagin it , ill feel nervous realy nervous cuz i know how red will make tension especially in a bedroom! & that girl doesnt know this so she will go to such a decor & hiddenly that decor will effect her rather u may say its her own choice! i dont say its not her own choice but its wrong even if she likes & many will praise rather she says its not wrong to have bad effect on her mentality!even that effect may not seem visible for her but according pscology it will effect her!

for a dress & flower its a one day so no way to hurt or harm just doesnt match & overlook , even if she loves it or did as fashion or etc...rather she will be so caring in color set....that only one pakistani bride i saw was matching a nice flower that realy didnt bother eyes & so nice but all other ppl i can say same...feeling so bad...

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Re: why flower instead bag in hand of asian brides?

wow.....i dont even know what else to add Paliz except that you do not make any sense and plenty of girls have already taken the words out of my mouth and written them.

A girl should do whatever she wants to make her happy on her big day. And if it makes her happy to carry a bouquet of flowers... who cares about what everyone (including you) thinks??? Because at the end of the day..it was her choice...and she made that decision for a reason and is content and happy about it.

To you it might be mismatched... but to the bride it might be the perfect compliment to her outfit. The finishing touch on a masterpiece. Everyone has their own opinions ...in regards to everything ...and especially fashion and things having to do with their wedding. Others have to learn to respect this.

Your example of bedroom decor and a bride holding flowers on her wedding day makes no sense to me. Things do not have to be matchy matchy and "the norm". People are allowed to do whatever they please if they think it is right to them and if they like it. This applies also to things like bedroom decor.

There is no reason for you to feel bad for anyone..... there is no reason for you to feel nervous about anything but your own life and own decisions.....

And I say this as a girl who will choose not to carry a bouquet on her wedding ......

Key word: "choose"

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Re: why flower instead bag in hand of asian brides?

i said i know she choose & i didnt mean she shouldnt choose why u fight...only i said its not matching & accoding main rules of designs its wrong...if she feels happy i didnt stop her....

i realy dont know wats so hard for u all? i said she shouldnt choose? i said why she choose? some said cuz they effected by west & some other said cuz choice....but i said something eles slef choice doesnt mean it match ur human nature...many ppl do manythings in their life good-bad same in choice many have good-or bad i meant every self choice doesnt mean being nice & for definition of Good i said it should be according human nature to seem good rather than that all have diffrent choice its else but there is good & bad choice that u cant deny it...

manythhings illl never choose for my own nor i feel its bad means im not into that style but that style is matching natura rather i like or not but somethings r bad thats why it makes bad feelings...

flower by own doesnt have problem but matching is pro in many cases i saw....
again i say dont say its personal choice i didnt say make a uniform but i said atleast they can go according designs rules for their health also...even its not big issue for wedding day but for home's decor ur home is as important as ur food is...u have never accept to eat bad foods rather u have to do so why u will be this much ignoring abt ur decor which feed ur soul cuz u think wat u choose is best?....its from psycology issues that u dont feel but it effect ...
its better we learn new things rather thinking wat we think is best cuz we dont see with our eyes...cuz all r not proffessional in decor & designs like all r not dr & im not saying i can cure my own....

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Re: why flower instead bag in hand of asian brides?

reading this made me so angry because this is what I have been facing lately. I wanted to wear a matha patti but everyone in my family (cousins and all) keep telling me how it's paindu and bla bla bla! I dont get how anyone else is to tell you what you can and cannot wear on YOUR wedding. I mean I understand if I was insisting on going in with a belly top and mini skirt (as that is not accepted in my family/culture) but simple things like flowers, colours, decore all that is MY choice. as will be my house
Everyone likes to think that they some sort of fashion designer because they do much research and know the best styles, but please keep in mind that at the end of the day, its a person's choice (ESPECIALLY on their wedding).

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Re: why flower instead bag in hand of asian brides?

I wore a matha patti and rocked it! Go for it girl!

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Re: why flower instead bag in hand of asian brides?

No ‘rules of design’ says one can’t match either clutch or flowers, infact there are no ‘rules of design’ except that the bride makes all the rules! :wink:

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Re: why flower instead bag in hand of asian brides?

BLOODY HELL LADIES!!!! talk about blowing it out of proportion!!

whether the bride is holding a bag or flowers it doesnt make a difference to the style whatsoever. naturally if the bride has (for example) chosen a red wedding dress, red shoes, matching red and gold jewlerry - she is not going to be stupid and hold yellow sunflowers while walking doen the hall is she? thats just stupid. however, if she was to hold a nice bouqet of red roses with a nice gold ribbon to contrast witht he dress and match the jewellery that would look good.

as for the bag, i think the bag routine was so gthat when people give salaami - the bride would fill up her purse and then give a small share of that to her dewar when he sits in her lap. so, if your a money grabbing kinda person... GO FOR THE BAG!!! lmao (am joking by the way.)

someone mentioned why are we incorporating western culture with asian tradition....:-?
correct me if im wrong but the way we do weddins now is COMPLETELY under western influence.

olden days it used to be NIKAH and WALIMA on the same day. the food at the walima was simple food (i.e. chaval and roti) girls side gives boys side dowry, girl go home BISH BASH BOSH end of!

nowadays we have mehndi, baraat, walima (which i may add is copied form western "RECEPTION"), the food is soooo elaborate (tikkeh, seekh kebabs, pakoras, choosa, gosht, sazi, chaval, salad, chutney, naan, roti, kheer, gajrela, drinks) and its gone sooooo out of control that we asians living in the west seem we have to compete with the lieks of western asian weddings (or even western wedding full stop) to have a sense of any fullfillment that the wedding way was good.

i agree with it though! why have a boring wedding?

apologies for offending anyone.

taaaaaaaaaaa

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Re: why flower instead bag in hand of asian brides?

^^^ thanks God someone get my point rather defending its their choice!

& if u dont know abt rules of designs doesnt mean there is no rules! even there r courses for ppl who wish to learn that...design doesnt mean self-choice...

anyway wat i meant is same this girl said match should be there always anyone's choice it wanna be , wearing a dress full of work with a bonquet full of flowers is over! white dress is simple so nice with a flower but a heavy dress with a heavy bunch doesnt match even any girl may wear As she choosed for sure i didnt choose for her but that doesnt mean nice!

if i said why cuz naturaly pakistani dress r heavy full of works & except a pic i saw that a bride had a dress with flower was matching mostly they r out of match....
but abt why they mix culture cuz i see among many countries in world asian r more traditional which is + point & with copying west little by little u will be near them without u feel it...

any way dont fight Go for UR own choice i just asked here in general WHY i didnt stop any of u nor i catched anyone who did it be4 that she shouldnt do!
its her own choice wedding/home or etc thats true but doesnt mean her choice is so nice & atleast i said i feel bad or it seem unmatch cuz may she doenst know the rules of designs,i dont call wat i dont like as pando(or such a thing) that manytimes i read in posts on wedding forum & that place no one defend its her own choice!

...for my own if i know abt anything ill do it but if im not sure or i know someone who knows more than me ill be happy to ask for guidance rather sticking my choice is best in world! my choice can be wrong as im not a designer or knowing all abt how to decor my home according soul needs! cuz i know this much that we r not only body but soul & only we dont need dr or food we need pscologist/islamic schoolar/ & etc for our soul....& real designs rules match according human psycology which i Mind & ill go for it & dont be worry u dont have to go if u dont want to do...