I’m not sure what you mean by not getting shaitan involved. However, when it comes to marriage with converts, there are two types I have seen: 1) he converts to marry you 2)you somehow get one who has converted prior to you being in the picture. In the first case, there’s nothing much to be done but it probably involved shaitan at some point (i.e. getting him interested in marrying you). In the second case, it’s about networking. From what I’ve seen, these ones like practicing women. I know a handful of white converts, and the women they’re married to are quite practicing. Their wives are at least hijabi and some are even niqabi.
I’ve seen white men lay down the law before their women in public several times. Though my observations have been mostly with Canadians, not Americans. What do you really know about marrying a non-Pakistani? Why don’t you just discuss your concerns with your parents?
Exactly! And also, other than Pakistanis, it’s not like there aren’t any Muslims around, no? So why would you talk about making an American white boy embrace Islam to marry you, or marry a white American convert.
well honsetly speaking i will not advice u too marry a american boy becoz of many reasons nthng personl to any 1 but i think they dont take marriage and relation as pakistani men well not all are same but still did u ready for marriage its not just u dont like pak men u marrying american boy its not like that marriage is not just we like or love so get married its involve 2 persons plus their families and in future kids .. if he accept islam BUT PURELY FROM HEART AND HIS CHOICE then its good but still u have to think alot before any decision and dont mind u just be sure that whom u marrying know the meaning of marriage he should respect u yur family knows what marriage in islam …
as far as prons and cons of any 1 we cant decide whose rite or who is wrong its only ALLAH knows we just pray that u will get very nice ,reiligious husband who care u and love u and always remain faithful with u BEST OF LUCK and yes last but not the least Parents choice is much better than us becoz they know very well what is their kids nature…
Again sorry if hurt any1
I kinda agree where you’re coming from. I don’t think it’s all about the fact that desi guys/men are bad or indecent etc, it’s more about the mentality that comes from the cultural upbringing. The mentality that men are superior in one way or another, at first everything is great and then the family drama and everything starts kicking in. And I do agree that not everyone is like that but majority definitely are.
Men from Pakistan especially those that come here (abroad) and think they’ve become all that, and can do whatever they like because their goal has been accomplished. Aside from that they’re mentality is completely different and not comprehensible by those brought up here. They lack understanding. And those from here ( some, not all) are too emerged in the western culture and appear to be wannabes. Aside from that their families play a huge role in their decision making, who to marry, how to spend their married life and all that. It’s very unappealing.
The thing with whit guys is that just like desi guys not all of them are cheating-drinking losers or sophisticated men. But there are those that seem more desirable than most desi guys. The converts have a respect for religion, manners and know their stuff. And although they do want a person who is practicing like them, at least the’re not disrespecting. It’s not like the appearing maulana’s that beat up their wives and talk about religion when they know nothing.
These people actually know what they’re talking about, love, care and are not conservative. This is coming from my own interactions.
And I do agree if you marry a guy converting after you meet him (unless he proves to be) might not be muslim for the right reasons. And DESPITE MANY PEOPLE GETTING MARRIED IN THIS WAY, it’s still a huge taboo among many desi families/parents
My best advice is whoever you marry look at his fear of God first, if he fears God, he’ll definitely respect you and love you for the right reasons. And he doesn’t have to be an extremist or conservative to do so.
Pros (American Husband)
-He MIGHT be a good guy. You’ll have to talk to him long enough to get to know him.
-You might not have that many in law issues interfering in your lives. But again you never know.
-He’ll already be Muslim and know Islam.
**
Cons (American Husband)**
-He MIGHT be a bad guy. You’ll have to talk to him long enough to get to know him.
You might have to deal with many in law issues, which may or may not be as intense as Pakistani in law issues. But again you never know. (Watch Dr. Phil to get more in sight).
You’ll have to watch Dr. Phil to get more insight into American in laws.
-He wont know or initially even understand everything else in your culture aside from Islam.
-You’ll have to teach it all to him. How to be a Pakistani.
-But he could be an extremist.
I can’t think of anymore. I dont know who we are talking about.
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**
Pros (Pakistani Husband)**
-He MIGHT be a good guy. You’ll have to talk to him long enough to get to know him.
-You might not have that many in law issues interfering in your lives. But again you never know.
-He’ll already be Muslim and know Islam.
-He’ll already know your culture.
-You won’t have to watch Dr. Phil.
Cons (Pakistani Husband)
-He MIGHT be a bad guy. You’ll have to talk to him long enough to get to know him.
-You might have to deal with many in law issues, but again you never know.
-He could be an extremist.
I can’t think of anymore. I don’t know who we are talking about.
