there’s been a few threads opened in regards to people being abused and harrassed cus of their ethnicity or their religion.. and mostly the perpetrators (sp?) happen to be desis… its really sad ya know..
but whose to blame? whose to blame for the way these people think? is it the circle they’ve been brought up in? if they had grown up in maybe lets say a different region… would their thinking be any different? Or is it the people ur surrounded with… how does one stop this never ending cycle of ignorance?
its the parents, and the way there raised.
so heres and example, the parents hate jews, n whenever they see a jewish person on tv etc they diss them. well guess what so will the kids. and whats wrong w/ jewish people?? ( yah i bet im gonna get hate mail over this) but i dont care about another persons religion / sexual orientation (just please dont hit on me, if your a girl) ... i mean its someone else;s life.. all religions think their religion is the right one ...
desis are hella racist.. and i guess so am i, but its mostly towards other desis.. i cant stand most of my pakistani friends anymore (we used to be good friends) and i've never hung out with the desi crew at school, cus i see too many desis at home/ family friend partys and relatives.
personally i really dont like the way desi folks think, and their "politics" ..
You know I've been wondering that lately... Why I am the way I am. Upbringing does have a LOT to do with the way you are. But then I feel guilty for using the upbringing excuse, because that would be like admitting my parents did something wrong. I love my parents more than anything, and they did the best they could under the circumstances. I dunno, sometimes I feel that if i were to say that I was a certain way coz of the way I was raised it would be equal to badmouthing them...
sara_zzz, true... but lets say, if ur attitude towards desis rubs onto ur kids, wont that be a bad thing too? shouldnt u be careful in the way u project ur views... thats going by u saying that its the parents fault
i dunno if its upbringing.. i guess it is that too to an extent.
I think it could be to do with how much interaction you have with other people, outside of ur own circle that is. If u spend day in day out with the same people, with the same thoughts, the same sort of ideologies.. one would never be able to break out of the loop... they will have to somehow see the other side of the coin to realise whether what they've been taught or heard is right or wrong..
for example, my mum grew up in a very conservtive household where girls didnt do much except for cook, clean and talk about clothes and gossip and stuff.. whereas dad grew up moving around from masjid to masjid.. after getting married.. they moved away from fam to the US (the location doesnt matter).. but the point is.. they moved out of that circle.. and im thinking, is that what it takes for people to change.. for people to be a more tolerant of others? hmm i duno
parents have got nothing to do with it. atleast not in the way it has been mentioned in the replies given above.
many children disagree with wat their parents hold dear.it depends upon the intellect of the child.wether he thinks on his own or not.some people just learn wen their parents tell them fire is dangerous(intelligent people???),some learn wen they see others damaged.and some want to check out on their own.if the child has got no mind,character of his own,only then wud the parents views rub onto him/her.
ur also ignoring one major basic factor...ego.many disagree coz they like to.want to feel noticed.then retaliate wen they r proven wrong.its the me me me thing.
^ oohh most desi people ive meet have got a huge ego, they think there right all the time..
NW- yah im scared ill make my kids anti-desi, but ive got tons of time,
im not talking about doing the wrong thing… :halo: u can discuss that in my other thread hehe… what im referring to is the way people think.. in regards to their views on other ethnicities.. or like the way girls are brought upto hate their mother in law/sis in law and stuff…
sara_zzz.. not all desis are bad im sure uve met a few on here that are nice.. however little the number.. it does make a difference though, doesnt it?
it's definitely the parents..and it not.. it may also be the people a person chooses to associate him or herself with. we're all born ignorant ya..about pretty much everything...but we're not born judgmental..racist..ethnocentric...it's something we develop from either the people around us..or our own insecurites..and from that..the cycle moves foward and lives on.
yah ive meet nice desi's, a couple cousins, and my moumani and khalas ( but i wouldnt wanna be thier daughter)
and i have a couple nice desi friends,
but most of my desi expirances arent that great, so i dont try to hard to make new desi friends.
i think stuff like thier view on other ethnicities is taught to them when their lil, and it could be genetics... i remember in sunday school, they would always make other religions sound horrible, and they would tell us not to associate w/ them ( our teach gave us an example of how a muslim guy w/ christian friends went to a party and they gave him spiked punch)
well that kid needs to find the right crowd, my friends arent like that.
they werent anti other ethnicities, because it was kinda mixed but mostly pakistani.
and i guess hatred towards other races comes from relatives in pakistan mostly. my older cousins would diss other races.
i think its something thats gonna stay a desi thing.
^ sara_zzz actually my christian/anglican friends were taught similar things about muslims.. how we were bad people... one of my really good friends was taught that.. and when we were 13-14 she tried her best to convert me to an anglican cus she didnt want me to go to hell... but i think the more we spoke to each other and found similarities.. the ignorance about one anothers religion and culture vanished...
its not genetics.. its the way we are thought to think.. if somenoe is feeding u stuff and not showing u the other side of the coin.. how will that individual ever know of the other side?
^ i think the sad thing is that some kids never learn the other side, and they grow up with just one image and it stays with them forever. i bet it happens here too, but i think it could be more common in paksitan, cus if they dont leave pakistan there gonna be around other people with the same views and will never see the other side of it ( the anti- americans there)
my friends never tried to convert me, but they would ask questions, and a couple of my friends are mormons, and there are alot of similarties between mormonisn n islam (like their moral beliefs, no sex before marriage, no drinkin, ) but i noticed that my mormon friends and their other other mormon friends that i met where alot more religious and stuck more with their beliefs than some of the muslim kids ive meet in my life. like the kids in pakistan, who go 'clubbin' n drink n knock up their fobby gfs.. its sad.
i once read somewhere....personality is a combination of nature n nurture....that is heredity n environment
i used to think that too.....but not anymore .....i donät think we can point out a few things which mould us in a certain character .....there r way too many things which come to contribute
u see even siblings can be quite opposite personality wise......they grow up in same home .....by sam,e parents ......etc. but still they can be different in their approach ....
as a parent , i would say ....give lots n lots of love to your children ...n show them you care......its the lack of desirable attention in many cases ...which causes a havoc afterwards....
rest is all our fate....n in Allah´s hands.....milions of prayers for that!!!
im sure uve met a few on here that are nice.. however little the number.. it does make a difference though, doesnt it?