When did it become ok for other ppl in family to hold, feed,
rock your baby? I mean like mil, fil, random aunties that
visit etc. I am ridiculously over protective abt my son n last night
hubs n i had our first fight ever EVER because
he kept putting pacifier in babys mouth while hes sleeping.
Im scared cuz my Mil is flying in next week n she is not
the type to give a crap abt what info i got from hosp nurses
or babycenter on dealing wit a baby. Shes gonna do it her way.
Is a fight kinda unavoidable?
Re: When was it ok?
P.s. Baby was born reallllyyy premature so he really does have
special needs. He needs to be held a diff way when feeding and
his feedings must be every 3 hrs in exact quantities day n night until
he reaches his due date. How can i make sure all this happens
without pissing ppl off?
Re: When was it ok?
P.s. Baby was born reallllyyy premature so he really does have
special needs. He needs to be held a diff way when feeding and
his feedings must be every 3 hrs in exact quantities day n night until
he reaches his due date. How can i make sure all this happens
without pissing ppl off?
Re: When was it ok?
As a mother it's your right to piss people off if it means taking care of your baby the way you have to. If she really is the type to not care what doctors say, well tough cookies for her.
Re: When was it ok?
Im not even preg yet or have any kids and i think this all the time lol...i just know i am going to be so over protective when my child comes...even though I dont want to lol...i can understand how u feel..best way is to just explain ur feelings 2 ur husband and make him realise that u dont want to be but cant help it...with time i think u will get better...but ur allowed to be like this...baby was part of ur body... :)
Re: When was it ok?
it is your right to decide, but honestly you're making your life harder by not training some help. mine came five weeks early via csection, and I couldn't have managed without hubby, ammi, and mil.
Re: When was it ok?
i agree with sahar...
communication is the key
my son had horrible reflux meaning he had to be held a certain way and fed with a certain bottle with a certain kinda formula so he woldnt throw up... that had to be mixed in a certain kinda way too! i didnt let that stop other ppl from holding him or feeding him.... cmon .. family has some right over your kid too...
all i had to do was explain the procedure to whoever was feeding my son and that was all.. they did it how i told them to ... it taught my son that its ok to be held by everyone rather than just mommy....
i couldnt have done it all by myself... no way!
Re: When was it ok?
Grandparents cannot be denied their rights to hold, feed and take care of their grandchildren. I would say that clear up your emotions so that they don't reflect in your dealings with your MIL otherwise something that can be resolved peacefully will take a bad shape.
If your child has special needs, just talk to your MIL while handing over your son, saying something like, "ammiji, he was premature so the doctors recommended we do this or that..." and say it like you'd say to your mother. It's make her feel respected.
MIL isn't "other people." Grandchildren are the pride and joy of our parents. Now, random aunties, well, that's another issue.
Re: When was it ok?
pkgirl part of me totally understands how u feel but part of me think u shud not b over protective and appreciate lil bit of help that comes ur way. i was a bit like u. i didnt want my daughter to spend alot of time with my MIL and i was overprotective ... felt strange if she was loved alot and all.. but my case was different i had a difficult labour which resultd in c section and i couldnt bond with my daughter for some days becus of that. after delivery in hospital i despised and felt jealous of my mil holdin my daughter and all. i felt incapable cus i was in alot of pain down in the stitiches area. felt practically paralysed. but dun think from ur heart.. use ur brain cus u WILL need a break here and there... for some chores.. if u wanna go out or anything. motherhood is EXHAUSTING so lil bit help is only gonna give YOU some peace of mind. i wudnt advise u to let ur MIL or FIL and others rock her or feed her all the time... but once in a blue moon when ure tired or wanna sleep or just bz doin somethin else just give it to ur MIL.. but dun give u to any relative thaz wot i feel. its upto how u feel abt it really. at the end of the day she/he is YOUR baby and u have the rite to feed her rock her and everything but grandparents have rights too.. to play with her and all. chill out and try to control ur emotions.
Re: When was it ok?
When did it become ok for other ppl in family to hold, feed, rock your baby?
My guess is when Habeel was born.
Re: When was it ok?
pkgrl....I had a premie too a year back and I know what you are feeling and I can understand your worries and concern.
See regarding the feeding schedule that is required to be followed strictly there is no other way round. I don't know about your MIL but MIL talked rubbish about the feeding tube in my baby's mouth. Don't get pressurised if the baby needs to be fed by tube thats the way it is. Explain to her why your baby needs a schedule and why things are the way they are ! Your baby needs to gain weight at this moment more than anything .
Explain to her that premature babies are prone to get infections and they need to be dealt with very very carefully esp till the due date. Tell her that she should not touch him without washing her hands.
You will have to communicate with her I am sure she will understand and Insha Allah she will turn out to be a good dadi ama and will help you. Don't think negative I am sure your baby is very important for her too.
Re: When was it ok?
understandble, although mil is not random aunties....
i went to a party the other day and this random aunty told me to put my baby in the corner out the way, i had brought fatima in the car seat.....i was politly rude....how dare she tell me to shove my 6 week old into a corner....where id be farr from her....i ignored her she said it few times, just told her to buggerr off..;]
Re: When was it ok?
My guess is when Habeel was born.
lol, i finally got your joke :D