all wrong?
what do you do for correcting perceptions of you in the eyes of others?
does it matter?
why does it matter?
and what is the end gain to both sides?
shae your thoughts if you like.
best,
Dushwari
Re: WHEN PEOPLE GET YOU...
If they care to listen, clarify their doubts with "Hikmah" (wisdom)
If they are "not VERY" dear to you & don't care to listen to you. No problem!
If they are "VERY" close to you & don't listen to you. Force them to listen to you at least once.
If after all explanations they keep misunderstanding you. Relax, Allah (swt) knows your intention. Remain quiet till they cool down and re-consider your explanation.
p.s. Before talking to them do recite Bismillah,...and the dua of speech.
“Rabbishrahli sadri ve yassirli amri. Vahlul ukdatan min lisani yefkahu kawli”
Re: WHEN PEOPLE GET YOU...
It never mattered to me much - UNTIL I had my boys. Then it became a very different story. When people hear "stay-at-home mom" they make all kinds of assumptions, mostly negative ones. And this can have a huge impact. For instance, at the doctor's office, the docs will tend to think the mom knows nothing and will dismiss concerns outright since they tend to think the mom knows nothing so it must be that the mom is doing something wrong. I could tell some real horror stories about that. As time goes on, I get tougher and meaner about the whole thing - I mean sometimes you have to get in their faces to make them understand so that your concerns are addressed properly. They only start to listen when you start quoting out of medical journals and this INFURIATES me.
and others...like friends and acquaintances who like to offer "free advice". They used to really piss me off at times. But now, I just tell them with a giggle and a smile that I get ALL kinds of free advice and the policy of the house is to place it in the container in the kitchen. (Its a garbage pail).
Re: WHEN PEOPLE GET YOU...
**Autonomy
**High scorer: Is self-determining and independent; able to resist social
pressures to think and act in certain ways; regulates social pressures to think
and act in certain ways; regulates behavior from within; evaluates self by
personal standards
Low scorer: Is concerned about the expectations and evaluations of others;
relies on judgments of others to make important decisions; conforms to
social pressures to think and act in certain ways
Ref:KNOW THYSELF AND BECOME WHAT YOU ARE:
A EUDAIMONIC APPROACH TO PSYCHOLOGICAL
WELL-BEING
CAROL D. RYFF and BURTON H. SINGER
Journal of Happiness Studies (2008)
Re: WHEN PEOPLE GET YOU...
No , i don't believe in correcting my perceptions . i think it's their problem that they were never unable to judge me - and approx. ninety - five percent of the people around me misjudge me .
Re: WHEN PEOPLE GET YOU...
Depends on who the person is...for general people i dont care...for close friends who may have a misunderstanding you try and clarify things...its about whether you value thats persons view of you...