Re: What's a good reason
I didn't think her reasons were frivolous at all. Privacy and space are really important. Islamically it's recommended to live away from inlaws (unless they're ill or can't manage on their own obviously) cos it is understood that a woman needs to feel comfortable in her surroundings and feel 'at home', and wouldn't that be pretty hard when ur living out of one little bedroom in ur inlaws house. Someone mentioned not being able to cuddle on the sofa as not being a big deal cos when u have kids, work etc. u won't be able to do much anyway but I think it's a shame that intimacy is not regarded as so important for newlyweds in our culture. I would not accept living with inlaws in their house except on a very short term basis (one month max). Funny some people think it's 'western influence' that a couple lives seperately and the evil demanding DIL is the one at fault but practically every other ethnicity of Muslim man moves out of parental home and still manage to look out for parents, what is it about desi men that means they can't/won't?
Dunno y the leaving home thing is such a big deal for us desis, moving out does not mean abandonment, the couple could live on the same street or just round the corner if MIL (it is usually mother who seems to make the fuss about son moving out) can't seem to cut the apron strings or have parents move in with kids (how practical is it to have a young couple with baby or kids living out of one or two bedrooms in inlaws house anyway, doesn't it make more sense the other way round??) or like I've seen in some families the grandparents spend time living with **each **of their children in turn, that way they get to see the grandkids loads and not too much pressure (hopefully) on each of the daughter-in-laws.