Ok so my debate with agnostics isn’t trying to proove religion is great or to prove to an athiest there is a god. But, I’d like to know what type of life will your children have? What faith to help them through rough times, what sense of community and responsibility?
When you have children….
What are the morals you wish to raise them with?
How do you want them to live their life?
How do you see them celebrating their holidays? Even having holidays?
very nice question KGirl, maybe I'll sound really immature here, because I'm only 19 and haven't really given much thought to a matter involving "my" kids. First priority, get someone who'll bear me kids ;)
Ok. jokes aside, Let me hazard a serious reply.
My kids shall lead a normal life, I'll surely try to teach them the basic essence of all religions, which is love all creatures, not to be selfish, help your neighbour, etc etc, these are themes that don't need the aid of any concept of God to frighten the kid by saying God'll fry you in hell if you don't obey and such nonsense.
I'll protect them from the evil influences of fundamentalist priests. I would want them to appreciate the concept of tolerance for other's beliefs.
I liked this question a lot.
What faith to help them through rough times<
Faith in themselves , confidence to suceed against any odds.
We ask such a question only because we have been taught by over parents to leave matters to God when they are beyond our reach, and I personally feel that this does make us, quite a good deal, cowardly and irresponsible, ever ready to blame God and fate.what sense of community and responsibility?<
The Indian community, surely religion doesn't play much of a role, unless you are bent upon turning to it for each and every thing.How do you see them celebrating their holidays? Even having holidays?<
Holidays can always be state holidays, there can always be non-religious festivals like the ones for harvest season, starting of monsoon,...a helluva lot of them.
Having religions just for holidays, hehehe, not a bad idea ;)
sorry if my views seem half baked, i just can't seem to imagine having kids of my own, atleast not yet.
I think as a muslim it is incumbent upon me to try to instill the love of prophet Mohammad and Allah in them through the initial phases of their life. The ideas that are taught at a very young age tend to shape how a person will view things when he or she grows up. I will most definately, Inshallah, teach my children the character of prophet Mohammad and why he was sent in this world and what are our responsibilities being muslims especially in a foriegn country.
As Allah says in the Quran that we have the best example in the life of our beloved Mohammad (peace be upon him). On the similar note, I will teach my daughters to imitate the example of the wives of our beloved prophet.
Islam has a culture of its own that provides the Ummat with our own holidays to commemorate such as Eid-ul-Fitr. I would not teach them to participate in christian or pagan customs of halloween and such since they stand in stark contrast to what our religion teaches. I can recall a prophetic saying to the effect that whosoever imitates a nation is from among them.
Allah is the final judge of our actions and intentions.
I would certainly not impose my morals on the children. such is not allowed by my religion.
my job will be to advise them of taking the moral system i believe in, just thru logic, and at every stage of their life, will freely let them choose between my moral system, or any moral system else, which seems attractive to them.
i certainly would like them to lead a life of their own choice, whether they accept or reject my beliefs.
If my beleifs are logical enough, i will be able to compell them to accept them.
imposed religion is of no use, and no gain.
jewels....i can only hope to do the same.
Queer…I'm having a hard time piecing together all that I want to say…
So this will be a bit rough in flow. I apologize…
I find people often choose to do things in their youth…. when they age and have children they choose a different path. I wondered, if you had thought about it.
I guess finding someone first to have them with is important. :)but no matter who she is…what you say and do....you have your own influence.
No I don't think holidays are reason enough to raise a child with religion but I remember how exciting eid was, memorial day or independence day doesn't hold the same wonder. The sense of excitement, community and affirmation of religious beliefs is still there.
The other comment I wanted to make. I work with many elderly and sick people…what I've found is that those with the strongest faith seem to deal best with illness, life and loss.
I met a 98 year old gentlemen who lives independently and still can mow the lawn and drive to the store (safely). I asked him what is the secret to long life…"well I walk with the lord". This comment has been said to me many times by others. In addition, I've heard of scientific studies where people with a stronger sense of religion in their lives had higher rates of survival from illness.
For me….having no religion seems to hold a certain emptiness of soul…..Almost a dissociation from society and life. Don't take this the wrong way…but that is how I feel.
I would like to raise my children with morals and values, a sense of accountability …not just to answer to god…but the ability to justify their own actions, to themselves. I like, jewels would hope they understand the logic and can stand for what they believe in….and independently make decisions. I also want them to have a sense of faith and the ability to feel there is something out there while they are traveling the storm called life. Their creator will always be there, can never fail them ….unlike everything else in this world.
[This message has been edited by kashmirigirl (edited June 06, 1999).]
** To guide and to teach is the act of God. Chasing too much, insisting beyond limit on every little matter, and to stop the children on every single thing, shows as if we are the ones who own the power to guide, and that we can force them to follow the true guidance.
Such is a hidden form of * shirk *. Our community should keep away from such deeds.
We pray for our children, and make them follow our rules and laws at the minimum. Not more than that. After that we trust Allah, the most high.
Whatever seed of piousness exists in a child, will nourish and grow on proper time. **
Interesting questions and equally interesting responses! I am still a little baffled as to what do morals, or a sense of belonging to a community, have to do with religion.
I am not religious, and my kids will learn their moral values from watching us (their parents), and from society at large. There is a basic concept of good or bad, and that can come outwith religion. The community we live in has people from all faiths ranging from Jews to Muslims, Zen to Catholics, and despite significant religious differences, everyone feels like a full member of the community. When there are block parties, etc, no one is asked to put a David's Start on their sleeves. Muslims attend Jewish funerals, and Hindus attend Christian weddings.
There are non-religious holidays where we live, such as Thanksgiving, or Martin Luther King's day. In fact, there is no official religious holiday (with the exception of christmas) in the United States. When you have no religion, you are free to celebrate all religious holidays equally. My kids celebrate Chanuka with their Jewish friends, as well as Eid with their grandparents. So, more fun for the agnostics!
I whole heartedly agree with iqadeer, masha'Allaah. I could not have expressed myself any better.
The importance of bringing up children with the right characteristics, tolerance, and manners can only be taken from an example, namely that of Muhammad (salallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam) and his wives (radhi'allaahhu unhum).
"And verily, you (O Muhammad SAW) are on an exalted standard of character."[Al-Qalam 68:4]