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Fasting has plenty of health benefits too. The digestive system has a chance to repair and heal itself. Lower blood pressure. It boosts metabolism so you can lose weight. The immune system gets to regenerate itself.
Not just a spiritual benefit. That’s probably why non Muslims do it sometime.
And if your nephew is agnostic then he’s not Muslim so it’s probably best that he doesn’t marry a Muslim girl.
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He is getting proposed by a lot of girls, he is just picky. My other nephew is agnostic also and this beautiful Syrian girl just moved in with him. She had a problem with his beliefs but is now come to terms with it. Her mother was against her moving in with him but now loves him to pieces. Life is about compromises.
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So they are not Muslim and the girls they end up with will not be Muslim either. Life is about compromise that’s true but for a Muslim there is no compromise when it comes to Allah. So I’m sorry but your nephews aren’t Muslims. I’m.not sure why I’m apologising I mean obviously that’s their decision. It’s just the truth. And if he’s going on romantic weekend trips with the banker girl then why does he need any other proposals at all? He’s obviously committed to her and will probably marry her. He’s made his decision.
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He called me regarding her grilling him for money and has grave concerns about that. Getaway maybe is for getting to know each other better. I would rather prefer for him to be with a good person regardless of how they classify themselves religiously. There can be various degrees of narrowmindedness many extremists think that all Muslims in the west are non-Muslims. As people start getting older their standards start to change, my wife had inquired about this really nice girl and they refused because of the social drinking issue, 3 yrs later they called to say they are now willing to consider but now he is with a really beautiful Syrian Muslim girl.
It seems like people who greatly limit their choice may end up not finding anyone.
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Limiting choice on whether someone is a Muslim or not? There are 1.6 billion Muslims in the world. If you are a practicing Muslim there is no need to settle for a non Muslim. And if he isn’t a Muslim then really he shouldn’t be marrying a Muslim woman. And Allah knows best.
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In north America only 0.1 percent of the population is Pakistani so if you limit your pool to that then good luck finding a mate. The Syrian girl chose my nephew as she had witnessed many girls in her community get slapped around, she wanted a man who respects women
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Ok. Peace.
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Refusing someone for the reason they drink, does not come under “Greatly limiting your choice”.
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I would still appreciate this girl as she has clearly stated out what she is looking for in a partner. At least she is not wearing a mask. You would find both girls and guys who would just act like a saint before marriage and then starts to show their true colors afterwards. This girls has shown her concern about the social drinking issue and has talked about money thing and as everyone has their own benchmark/criteria for getting married, so does this girl. you might dislike her because she’s being materialistic but you need to see if your nephew minds this or he is okay with this. And if he is okay with her approach, then i think you should stay out of it and let him decide for himself.
On the part that she is okay with sleeping before marriage but not okay with him drinking, i would say that most of us pick things from religion as they suit us. If we don’t make a hue n cry for a Muslim doing a lot of charity on one hand, but not taking out the time to take care of own parents, then why do we make it such a big deal for this girl.
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Actually it would have made her a hypocrite if she drank socially but saw it as a problem in your nephew @Bobby1 uncle. I really don’t see why she should be ok with drinking just because she indulges in physical relationship before marriage… Two completely different things, not everyone is perfect when it comes to religion. Also, her being upfront about what kind of lifestyle she wants is actually quite commendable because she is not deceiving your nephew. And if he is ok with all that then I don’t see what the problem is. Weren’t you the one who said you can’t force someone to love you? So how exactly is trying to set him up with girls he is not interested in, doing anyone a favor?
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So Pakistanis are 0.1 percent of the population and then further limit to shias and sunnis, then further to punjabi sindhi etc, then further to gora kala and then further to lamba chotta then further to darhi molvi, not darhi molvi but religious, then further to religious but not misogynist…how many lifetimes is it gonna take till we find the right one. Three of my nephews are getting married next year one to a Vietnamese girl, one to a hindu and one to a Syrian. The one who is a good Muslim boy 6-2 engineer/mba good job is the one having the hardest time finding a match.
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I don’t believe in right and wrong but in different, he is not money oriented. The land developers good looking girl comes from a background of hundreds of millions and that didn’t even play in the equation for him. His portion of inheritance will be a few million so money is not the issue it is the priorities that are, thankfully he didn’t tell the gold digger that. He is a CPA and has a really great business. His humility and not driving a fancy car is misleading. The girl should marry someone like herself, she did marry a superficial guy before who cheated on her. I think boys get attracted to the attitude, the nakhra etc but get tired of it shortly and it is just the pursuit that is exciting. That doctor girl was so right for him never asked a word about money just who he is as a person.
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Read my post again. I am not referring to all these. i said refusing someone on basis that he/she drinks does not come under greatly limiting!
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Lol..this hit’s close to home…but being 6’2 your nephew should still be getting tons of proposals, just probably not attracted to the women. Which I find is my issue as well…, but you can also greatly increase the chances by adding Canada and U.K into the mix, and if you’re really despo go back home and look in Pak. But honestly, you shouldn’t limit your self to pak, their are also good Indian-muslims out there and bengali’s as well.
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There is a weird thing going on here with really weird expectations. One girl rejected him because he purchased clothes from Walmart, one family rejected him when he was making 60K at Bell Canada and then came after him after he started making 125K for Bank Of America. He was engaged to a girl who wanted him to support her thru further education and he suggested a few courses and she said who the eff does he think he is trying to tell her what to do. Another girl he was serious about but then he saw her half naked pictures with guys on social media.
His parents are meat n potatoes kind of people and aren’t good at Rishta hunting. I don’t think kids born here have a chance to gel with girls raised back home. Parents should teach their kids to attract women
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Wow, rejecting someone because they buy clothes from Walmart is a little extreme.
Finding the one is a process. You’ll meet tons of people and as you learn about others, what’s more important is how much you will learn about yourself. What you like/dislike. How you want to live your life and who you want to spend it with. You’ll make mistakes and that’s okay. I think your nephew is on the right track and it’s a journey he needs to go through. I think you’ve advised him well, as someone who is older, more mature and a wisher for him but you need to let him figure things out himself. He is entitled to his preferences and so is the other person.
Sometimes you have to go through the ups and downs and meet a few bad apples and then when you do finally meet the right person you’re more appreciative of them. Sometimes we think a person might not be the best for another but marriage is very special and allows us to change and adapt into the person we are supposed to be for our spouse. We all come with our own pasts and baggage and if your nephew is willing to look past it and if the other person is as well I think it’ll work and if not then they are both free to move on.
Let’s let this guy figure things out on his own for a while and see how everything unravels.
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LOL, what really?!!
Who rejects someone cause of walmart clothes?..and ya money is always an issue these days with most girls I find. A friend of mine who made 6 figures working at cisco in toronto, got rejected cause he wasn’t making more than 200K (which the girls brothers were both doing). Girls and parents want a guy who can provide and can give them a certain lifestyle. I got rejected plenty of times cause of money as well, which I guess is fair…, My yearly income is well under 6 figures, but I’m good at playing the stock market so I don’t tell them my networth, but i’ve been saving money for 10 years and re-investing it, compounding is the 8th wonder of the world of course. Either way, there are days I wonder if I should tell them, but its better not too.
But hey, at least he’s tall, I’ve got shut down alot of times for being short as well..5’7 aint no 6’0+…
And wow, he was engaged and things broke off cause of a few courses? I highly doubt that was just the reason, probably more underlying issues there. And with social media…OMG don’t get me started, thats a whole nother issue I’ve also dealt with…
I’ve seen girls tell me something about not smoking and partying, and then you scroll through their instagram and back in the day you see their partying days or clubbing days. The sad thing is, even if you ignore this stuff it still doesn’t end up working out for other reasons. I’ve also talked to a girl who said she had sexted naked pics to a guy before and I had to end it there (at least she was honest).
Any ways, my parents are the same…, some days I wish I should have just dated when girls asked me out when I was younger, (80% of my friends did) and just ignore my religion, but I couldn’t get my self to do it. 
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Bobby pai didnt you say earlier that you would leave your wife if she buys you gift from Walmart?? 
Now you are saying your nephew bought clothes from walmart for his girl and she rejected him??
So technically you are taking notes from that girl!!!
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You got me good, I was facetiously speaking my friend…I left the entire family and community for her, I would never ever leave her.
He didnt buy clothes for her from WMT he used to wear WMT clothes, dude’s got no game. I taught my wife’s nephew game and he gets a lot of girls. My brother taught him books but not street smarts,
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I do think she is a hypocrite, as both zina and drinking can be considered major sins. It doesn’t really matter that they are different sins. You could perhaps even argue that comitting zina is worse than drinking.